Lost Recap: 05 x 08 LaFleur

Are you ready for this? Because, ladies and gentlemen, this week it is FINALLY Sawyer’s turn after I don’t know how many episodes, the Man, the Legend, my Favorite character out of Lost gets an episode.

The paragraph above should have prepared you for what is to come but in case it is not clear, DISCLAIMER: This is a Sawyer episode. There will be: drooling; squeeing; ranting; exploding ovaries; tears; laughs; more drooling and a LOT of beautiful, pretty photos.

Lost: Season 5 – Episode 8 , LaFleur

So, the episode opens and there is the moment when Locke falls down the well and turns the Wheel of Time and we learn what happens with the people that stayed behind. They shift in time and go back to a point when there was a FREAKING EGYPTIAN STATUE???!!! Before it can sink in, they shift again and I am like WAIT! WHAT? WAAIT.

People. Was the island Egyptian at some point? Because if you recall, there are hieroglyphs all over the place. At the temple. In the Hatch. AND Richard wears EYELINER and lives forever – I think that settles it: I always thought Richard was some sort of God of Hawt – now it has been proven. But back to the point at hand which is….

They have shifted back to a point and they realise that this time something is different.

They are not bleeding, for starters (thank God!)

So they realise that whatever it is that Locke is doing, it must have worked. “Now what” Juliet Asks. “Now we wait for them to come back”  Sawyer says dramatically

“For how long?” “As long as it takes”

oh the DRAMA, the DRAMA it’s too much – because we cue to:

3 years later and some unknown individuals are having a parteeee at one of the Dharma stations

Then they see someone in one of the screens and they are like, ooo we need to get LaFleur (not that I understand what they are saying mind you….I think they say: we need to get the “floor” and I am like, ha?)

They run and we see they are in Othersville

They knock at LaFleur’s door and he answers and they explain they have a breach of security and Horace seems to be drunk and LaFleur speaks and I recognise the voice (because I would know this voice ANYWHERE)

And it’s Sawyer’s! And HE is LaFleur! And he works for the Dharma Initiative and lives in Othersville! AND he has shaved and looks amazing.  And he says “Son of a bitch” awwwwwwww, my baby.

Then he goes and get his uniform and he is HEAD OF SECURITY – WTF?!

He is then joined by Miles in the Dharma van and and they drive to get Horace who is their leader…..he got drunk and is playing with some dynamite or some other kind of explosive, not that care about that because I want to looooook at Sawyer’s pretty face again.

Oh, here he is again, carrying his boss to his lady wife , Amy who is

Michelle! from 24! Tony Almeida’s wife (Tony Almeida is NOT dead by the way, I KNEW it). Ahem. I digress.

Michelle from 24 is pregnant.

And decides that now is a good time to have the baby. Sawyer helps her and then….flashback to 3 years ago

They leave the well behind and find Daniel who is babbling, “I won’t do it, I am not gonna do it. ” Sheesh kebab, the guy wasn’t very right in his mind, I guess he has gone cuckoo now.

They ask about Charlotte. He says she is dead. That when there was the light she moved on and they stayed.

Sawyer is like. Wait, is it over? And Dan is like:

“Of course it’s over. Wherever we are now — whenever we are now — we’re here for good.”

Ok then. WHEN is now?

So they decide to go back to the beach, or Sawyer decides. Miles is all like,oooo who has made you leader?

and he is like: “Or maybe when we get there, you’ll… you’ll wanna go back to the Orchid again. And then when that gets boring, we can head back to the beach. It’s the only two plans you people have”. Oh, I see. Now that Sawyer is all good and heroic they need someone to be the anti-hero and to get all the snarky lines….but I am sorry folks, Miles is no Sawyer.

Hummm this cap really has no use here but he looks so pretty.

Anyways they decide to go to the beach. Sawyer thanks Juliet for getting his back and she says that she thinks the plan is stupid too but better to have a stupid plan than no plan at all.

They are all flirty and light and I DON’T LIKE WHERE THIS IS GOING OKAY?

But right then they hear some shots and screaming and they run and they see a couple and a woman being captured by Others and Miles doesn’t want to get inv0lved because Faraday says they can’t change the past so why bother but Sawyer, my hero, wants to helps and asks Juliet to get his back and she is like ALWAYS and I like ooooooooo I don’t like where this is going….

And Juliet saves him because one of the guys was going to shoot him and they kill the man and rescue

the woman who is

Michelle from 24!

and the man, her husband Paul, is dead. They bury the Others because she mumbles something about a truce, then she asks who they are and Sawyer comes up with a story about how they were on a boat and there was an accident and they were looking for their friends.

She takes them to Othersville, Jin helps carrying her husband. On the way there, Sawyer tells everyone that he will do the talking, because he used to lie for a living and he is very good at it.

They stop at the sonic fence and they know what it is , but they can’t tell Michelle from 24 and they asks her to disconnect the thing and she does it, they cross over and

and fall down in pain.

She just pretended, the sneaky biatch. She had ear plugs.

Back to the future, Michelle from 24 is having her baby

And the doctor doesn’t know what to do. What kind of doctor is that anyway?

So Sawyer runs and…

gets the mechanic???

Who is Juliet!

and asks her to help the Amy and the baby. Juliet , if you recall , was brought to the island to find out why babies were dying so this is probably before that – and I wonder if something thay they do now is not the true cause. Faraday says that “whatever happened, happened” but now they are LIVING in the past – by the way, it’s 1977!!! – so surely, anything they do can and will matter right? Consequences and everything.

Anyways, she goes and she is all like, ooo I don’t know if I can do this.

And Sawyer is all like, I know you can. You are awesome. etc etc.

AND I DON’T LIKE WHERE THIS IS GOING. AT ALL.

Outside Sawyer is like the baby’s father, he is so nervous.It’s really cute.

Then Jin comes and his English is pretty good now and asks how is everything and there is no news

Then they talk how Jin has been looking for their friends and didn’t find anyone today again. No sign of their people and how long will they look for them. And Sawyer says for as long as it takes.

Then Juliet steps outside and she is all happy because the baby? the baby is OK.

And DEAR LORD can this man be more adorable? Seriously, look at him. It is a good thing I kicked Dear Partner out of the room because I need to replay this scene. You know, solely for research purposes. So that I can get the scene right for the recap.

Moving on.

3 years ago, Sawyer is passed out.

Then Horace, with the horrible 70s hair-do  asks who they are. Sawyer spins this amazing story how they are in this expedition looking for an old ship, the Black Rock and their boat wrecked and they are looking for their friends and his names is Jim LaFleur.

Horace buys the tale but tells them they need to leave the next day on the submarine. Sawyer is desperate, they need to stay on the island if they want to go back to their own time!

Outside, the others wait for the outcome of Sawyer and Horace’s convo. Juliet tells everybody that she used to live there.

Faraday is all looney tunes and then he sees…

little Charlotte. And this does not bode well.

Then the alarm signal goes crazy and they are made to run inside the houses

Because the Others are coming!! the Others are coming!

It’s Eyeliner Richard!!

Horace goes to talk to him and Richard is not very happy that there are two of his men missing. What about the truce. What does Horace have to say about it?

Then Sawyer is all like, let me deal with it.

And Juliet is all like. What are you going to do? And he is like, I will figure out something.

Then the God of Cool walks to the God of Hawt and says: Hello, Richard. I am the guy who killed your men.” He tells the story , how he heard gunshots, how the guys were attacking the couple, how they attacked him first. he had no choice

He was defending himself. (whoa ,mamma, look at him)

Richard is all like, why are you telling me all this? What do your people say? They are not my people, hoss. So if you go some sort of truce it ain’t broken. Sawyer says like an escapee from a western . (whoa,mamma look at him)

Ay, ovaries about to explode, ovaries about to explode.

Then Sawyer says “Did you bury the bomb?” ooooooooo. Richard looks at him like HE is da bomb. And he is, cause he is all like: a few years ago a bald man walked into your camp and told you he was your leader and then disappeared. “That man’s name is John Locke and I am waiting for him to come back. “Just like that, all cool and collected.

And we, folks, need to pause here and analyse this moment in history. This is a man who has come a long, long way from season 1, when he didn’t care for nothing and no-one to being a man who cares about people and knows how to take care of them. Most importantly, someone who is able and capable to respond aptly, camly and responsibly in times of trouble.

Now, let’s compare to the man who is supposed to be the hero of the show shall we? one Jack Shephard? In the same situation, I BET he would be 1) crying 2) yelling and 3)accomplishing nothing in the process.

(no it doesn’t matter that they are both fictional characters that do only what the writers tell them to do!)

In any case, Sawyer pacifies Richard who “only” wants to take Paul’s body with him and they say yes. They really have no choice.

Then Sawyer goes to meet Juliet and Juliet is all like. I want to leave. I don’t want to stay here. I am going with the sub and I am like gogogogogogogo

because I so don’t like where this is going.

and she is like, I have tried to leave for 3 years now it is my chance. And even though I want her to go , I am also like YO STUPID it’s 1977, what are you going to do?

Which is exactly what Sawyer tells her. Then he is like…CUTE and ADORABLE again and he says: you are going to leave me here aaaaaaaaaaall by myself with the crazy scientist, the I- speak-to-dead-people-guy and Jin who speaks only Korean?

And then the final blow: “who is going to get my back” followed by a throw of his hair and a to die for smile. Really what would any woman in sane conscience do? Undress and throw herself at his feet. Wait. No, that’s not the right answer, is it? Sorry:

Stay, of course.

3 years later: Sawyer is picking flowers and smelling them. KILL ME NOW. BECAUSE I KNOW WHERE THIS IS GOING.

A TABLE PREPARED FOR TWO.

JULIET IS COOKING.

HE OFFERS HER THE FLOWER. OMG what is this?

It is me smiling. Because he looks so happy. And really, I have rooted for his character for so long, it does my soul heaps of good to see him like this. Even if it is with Juliet and not with Kate.

She is gorgeous, by the way, there is no denying. And I thought it would NEVER work between them…but it does.   He tells her how awesome she was with Michelle from 24 and the baby

They hug

They laugh

They kiss.

She says I love you.

And he says I love you too. And really, it’s cute and it’s clear they are so happy and they are FRIENDS which is so important. I am happy for them , truly, I am.

Next, Sawyer is reading next to a sleeping Horace. He has new glasses.

Horace wakes up and Sawyer says he has bad news and good news:

Good news: You are a daddy (look at his face, can this man be more handsome?)  Bad news: you missed it.

Then Horace says he got drunk because he found Paul’s necklace in Amy’s drawer and he asks Sawyer if 3 years was enough to forget someone.

Then he says: “I had a thing for a girl once. And I had a shot at her…” “But I didn’t take it. For a little while, I’d lay in bed every night, wondering if it was a mistake, wondering if I’d ever stop thinking about her. And now I can barely remember what she looks like.” “And her face… it’s… She’s just gone, and she ain’t never coming back. So, is three years long enough to get over someone?”

“Absolutely.”

Do you know what is this sound you hear my dear friends: my heart breaking. For 5 years I have shipped Sawyer and Kate. I have rooted for them to be together. I have followed this man and his love for THAT woman and how he changed because of his love for her. And it’s now another woman who will see the fruits of his change. I guess it’s ok, because in all honesty, I can’t stand Kate, but it is a very strange feeling.

Day time. Juliet and Sawyer are spooning. The woman is clever , I will give you that.

Then Sawyer gets a phone call from Jin and we all know what is coming, right? Be still my heart! Reunion! How are they going to play that?

For starters, Sawyer does NOT tell Juliet what is going on….hummm..

Then he drives to meet….

Them…..

First Hurley comes out of the van…

Then Jack who gives one of his half-assed smiles

Then……*insert amazing powerful song here*

……

…….

……

……

…..

….

….

And we KNOW, we just KNOW that Sawyer could not, would not, never, in a million years FORGET Freckles, this woman who was his first love. And although it is clear that there is friendship and love between Sawyer and Juliet  there is more passion and wanting in this one smoldering look at Kate than in any scene between Sawyer and Juliet. And with that my heart is pieced back together, I cry a little bit but end up torn and ranting about how TPTB are stupid SOBs who created yet ANOTHER stupid love triangle. Man. One thing though: Kate needs to step up and go through HER redemption  because now she is the one who needs to deserve Sawyer. And Juliet better fight for her man .

LOST.

I love this show.

All caps courtesy of Lost-Media