Book Reviews DNF Books

A Tale of Two DNFs: Book Discussion and Giveaway of Night’s Rose by Annaliese Evans

And now for something different: this is the first ever book that both Ana and Thea Did Not Finish. Instead of a proper joint review we will discuss the book and why it did not work for either of us. And in the end, we throw a dare at YOU.

WARNING: This post contains spoilers

Title: Night’s Rose

Author: Annaliese Evans

Genre: Fantasy/ Paranormal Romance

Publisher: Tor
Publishing Date: March 31, 2009
Paperback: 384 pages

Stand Alone or series: first in a series

Summary: Beauty was not awakened by a kiss.

For nearly one hundred years, Rosemarie Edenberg has worked tirelessly to wipe the dreaded ogre tribe from the earth. Now the tribe has gathered in London to work a spell that will destroy the scourge of their kind, the woman they call the Briar Rose.

Two magnetic men will unite to aid Rose–her mysterious Fey advisor, Ambrose, and the vampire, Lord Shenley, an Earl of scandalous reputation and even more scandalous appetites. One will save her, one will betray her, and both will challenge her to face the past that haunts her.

Once upon a time, she was ensnared in the mists of enchantment, cursed to sleep one hundred years. But this beauty wasn’t awakened with a kiss, and has never known happily ever after.

With the help of her handsome allies, Rose may yet find it.

Why did we read the book: This book is marketed as a Fantasy book which is a retelling of the Sleepy Beauty tale. Since we are both suckers for retellings and fairy tales it was a no brainer that we would read this. We find the cover really beautiful. Then it got really good reviews around the internet. THEN we both got review copies: one from Katiebabs and another one from Tor. It was meant to be.

ONCE AGAIN, WARNING. THIS POST CONTAINS SPOILERS! Read on after the break, if you dare…

Discussion

Ana: Words that have been used to describe this book include: Dark, Bleak, Twisted. And at first glance it may well be so. The opening chapter was amazing and kicks-ass. Rose is a killer, a trained assassin of the Tribe aka, the Ogres. She is known as the Scourge. She has a Fairy-Sword, she knows how to fight , she is a warrior. It starts: she kills an Ogre then she is attacked by a few more and she dispatches them quite swiftly. There is a hint to the fact that she is cursed, that she has connections with the Dark Fey, that she was the Sleeping Beauty of the fable, but that she woke up 20 years too soon to find herself in the middle of childbirth, because she was raped by an Ogre.

So yeah, twisted and dark. And awesome as a premise. Just the way I hoped it to be. At least for the first few pages I was a happy camper.

Then she is joined in the middle of the fight by this vampire whom she is training, Gareth. He is, dashing, attractive, rakish. He is witty, he taunts Rose. He is hot. So hot, Rose forgets they are in the middle of a fight and starts to feel her traitorous body responding to his beauty. Her nipples harden, she is breathless and I am like WTF?

Really? Is this how the book is going to go? I go on because The Premise!The Reviews! Are so.good. Not a few pages later she meets with Ambrose, the Dark Fey that is her mentor. She is in love with him. He is big, dashing, dark, hot. Her nipples harden because she is so aware of him. She has loved him for ages you see. She is torn between the two. She loves Ambrose yet she lusts after Gareth, NO wait, she loves Gareth now but still lusts and possibly love Ambrose EVEN THOUGH HE WAS PRESENT WHEN SHE WAS RAPED BY THE OGRE AND DID NOT STOP IT. That my friends, would have made me KILL Ambrose and not go on whining about how horrible he is. She can’t trust either man.

Oh yeah, they are doing all this, back and forth between the two men whilst the Ogres are trying to fulfill a prophesy that may well bring the end of the world.

Thea: Dark? Twisted? I feel like I must have received a different book. Night’s Rose is like freaking Kresley Cole, A Hunger Like No Other, ALL OVER AGAIN. Except…worse.

I have to agree, Ana. I had seen the stellar reviews, read the blurb, and was intrigued by the premise. Heck, I’m the one that actively sought this book out! And I agree, the book starts out strong with Briar Rose tearing up some Ogre ass (ogres who look like extremely fat people, as their disguise to sidle up to folks in the ton only to seduce and then eat them), and she’s pretty awesome. But then – wouldn’t you know it? – a really sexy vampire whom Rose has been mentoring shows up and all of a sudden Rose’s nipples get all puckery and achy and her “sex” gets all wet and her womb is hungry. Seriously. Hungry wombs? Sounds like something out of a horror movie…oh wait, it is.

Vagina Dentata, baby

I digress.

Basically, Rose finds herself totally into both her sexy vampire, Gareth, and her brooding dark fey mentor (whom she has loved forever) Ambrose. And…Rose is reduced to a simpering ninny. She’s a badass with a blade but she cannot control her diamond hard budding nipples (SERIOUSLY WHAT IS IT WITH ALL THE NIPPLES?!?!?!?!) whenever she’s around Ambrose or Gareth. COME ON LADY.

The story is secondary in this book to the sex, plain and simple – which is a shame because the premise sounded like it had something going for it. Even worse, the characters are mind-numbingly stupid. Rose is a moron. Gareth is every stereotype of a sexy vampire rake that has ever been written, and Ambrose is something else (he sat idly by, while Rose was raped repeatedly) entirely. Furthermore, all of the characters spoke like folks from the 21st century pretending to be in 1750 England (which didn’t feel like 1750 England in the slightest). The world building was pale and incomplete, the characters alternately boring and laughable.

What exacerbates the situation further is the fact that the sex isn’t even good! I mentioned Kresley Cole earlier, and while I think her stories are wafer thin and ludicrous, at least the sex is good. Not so with Night’s Rose. For example:

Rose shifted restlessly beneath him, legs churning against the soft sheets and the rougher flesh of his thighs. The purely masculine feel of that rock hard furred skin against hers was almost as breathtaking as the mouth teasing back and forth between her breasts.

Or:

He sucked her bud into that wet cavern

Emphasis my own. Churning legs? Is she making butter? Furred skin and wet caverns…yeaaaaah, not my thing.

Ana: I have two big problems with this book: one stems from reader’s expectation. I did not expect it to be so erotic, to have so much sex/sex-related stuff on it. It surprised me because I wasn’t expecting it. Had I known, I would NOT have picked up the book. I wanted to read a retelling of the Sleeping Beauty tale within a Fantasy context NOT an Erotic one. I have no problems with sex in my books (hello. Romance reader here.) but I do have a problem with books where the characters are motivated, moved, characterised by sex or their sexual encounters. This is not my cup of tea at all. I was led to believe that this book would be something else. Rose starts the book as her own woman. A Fighter with a dark, horrible past but soon it becomes clear that is a sham. She is only a wishy-washy lady that needs to be protected by one man and guided by the other.

The princesses in Shrek 3 were far more entertaining – and loyal – than this Briar Rose

Thea: Word. Had I known that aching nipples would be on every page, I would not have read this book. I’ve read some excellent paranormal romance (Nalini Singh’s Angels’ Blood comes to mind), but overall it’s a genre that usually doesn’t do it for me. I’m not really a romance reader, I have a juvenile sense of humor and Night’s Rose is like the perfect storm of badness for me. Word to the wise: Night’s Rose is described by the author and publisher as “historical urban fantasy”….um, no. As Ana astutely pointed out in an email, a whole lot of this book takes place in rural England.

I thought this was a retelling of Sleeping Beauty in the context of a fantasy setting, as Ana did, with a secondary romance plot. Night’s Rose was definitely NOT what I signed up for. I don’t appreciate being blindsided by renegade aching boobies and dripping wet hoohas in my books.

Ana: My second problem with the book is the language. Especially the purple prose when it came to the sex: cream going doing thighs; womb that hurts because Rose was so excited; womanly regrets; traitorous womanly parts – I hate those. I freaking hate those. Firstly, cream going down thighs should make one see a doctor; second, painful womb reminds me of period pains and there is nothing I loathe more than a traitorous womanly body – how dare someone’s nether parts behave in such a way?

The point where I nearly reached my limit was the first sex scene between Gareth and Rose. It starts with Rose wanting to interrogate Gareth so see if she can trust him. This epitome of stupid ties him to the wall with manacles to two seconds later think this is not a good plan because all she wants to do is to shag him. Please. She then realises, with the Gareth’s expert guidance that she is wait, for this: a submissive, he is a dom, together they will know many pleasures starting with her learning how to be an obedient wife, because all that she ever wanted was to be a mother and to have beautiful children.

It is a sign of how much I can endure that I did not quit right then and there. I did reach my limit when a few pages later, he reached for the hair brush and spanked her. This was SO not what I signed up for.

As a reader I prefer not to read about S/M relationships (not my cup of tea, although I have no problems with it, when it is well written. I have in mind a recent read of mine: A Hint of Wicked) but because it came out of the blue with cartoonish characters, stupid language and because it all happens as the POSSIBLE END OF THE WORLD AND ROSE’S DEATH APPROACHES, it felt so out there in a book that was supposed to be a Fantasy novel. Plus, the kick-ass character that appears at first, coupled with the promise of a “dark” read created an expectation that came crumbling down when it was showed and explained to me that all that Rose really wanted was to be an obedient wife (at least in the bedroom).

Thea: YES, exactly Ana! The hungry aching womb freaked me out. The creamy discharge (ewwwwwwwww) along with furred hard parts, moist caverns, etc etc etc. Those damn traitorous womanly parts! Betraying good sense and being so deceptive and…womanly. *gags* That’s just offensive.

The brush spanking scene, in contrast, was flat out hilarious.

There, he fisted his hand into her unbound hair, wringing a gasp from Rose. “Perhaps I should continue to put this brush to better use.”

Gareth’s grip on her hair grew even tighter, holding her in place as he brought the flat of the brush down on her bottom. Once, twice, three times, until a moan burst from her lips. To her surprise, it was not a sound of protest or pain, but an invitation for her husband to continue his rough treatment. Her sex already ached, damp with excitement, her body eager to feel Gareth’s cock shoving inside her from behind.

Seriously.

I’m no prude (Jacqueline Carey’s Kushiel’s Legacy series is one of my favorite series’ of all time), so long as it is written well and in the context of the story. And Ms. Evans’s Night’s Rose is no Kushiel’s Dart. Um, HELL no.

I’m not even going to bother delving into the themes and the characterizations because they weren’t developed at all in this book. Suffice to say that the whole good wifey being disciplined by her hubby storyline? Not my thing at all.

One last gripe – HOW is this bastardization anything resembling the Sleeping Beauty fairy tale? The actual amount of time spent on the myth is negligible at best. Talk about false advertising.

So are we missing the point? Do you disagree with our views on this book? Wanna know for yourself? We are giving away our ARC copy of this AND AN ARC OF THE UPCOMING SEQUEL, The Prince of Frogs.

Just leave a comment on this post and let us know why you want to read the books – but there is a catch; the winner must write a review (agreeing or disagreeing with us) to be posted here by the end of August. The contest will run until Saturday at midnight (PST), and we will announce the winner in the weekly stash. Good luck!

——————–

Other Reviews: (Wildly different than ours, if you want a different perspective)
Romance Book Wyrm
Renee’s Book Addiction
Babbling About Books, and More!

61 Comments

  • heidenkind
    June 10, 2009 at 12:38 am

    What?!?!? This book does sound anything like what I was expecting based on the other reviews. Before, it sounded like it had a snowball’s chance in hell of being good. Now it sounds like a train wreck. And full of lulz.

    I have to admit, though, you have me intrigued enough to wonder just how bad it is….

  • heidenkind
    June 10, 2009 at 12:39 am

    Does NOT is what I meant to type. *sigh*

  • Jessica
    June 10, 2009 at 1:43 am

    Insomniac chiming in: This does sound awful, but your complaints about the descriptions of the heroine’s body (the nipples, the womb) make me wonder how much romance you have been reading lately (you especially Ana). I find that kind of language all over the place, from historicals to contemporaries to paranormal. If I refused to read romances that gave nipples their own personalities and featured wombs that could effectively send morse code with their pulsing, I would be done with the genre. I don’t like it either, but I view it as a “take the bad with the good” kind of tradeoff.

  • Bridget Locke
    June 10, 2009 at 2:01 am

    I read this book & spent 90% of the time laughing & the other 10% wanting to cry. I thought the premise was very promising only to have it turn into some sort of farce. And then finding out that he watched while she was raped and his justification of it all just pissed me off. Please do NOT putting me in the running. I have nightmares about this book. Eesh!

  • Ana
    June 10, 2009 at 2:05 am

    Jessica: that’s a good question. I don’t know if you noticed but I have been reading much less romance lately and I find myself gravitating towards those that have less sex scenes OR the sex scenes are organic and not there for the sake of it. I am growing increasingly tired of the “toomuchness” in some books. I don’t know what that has to say about my reading habits but they are changing, that’s for sure. Don’t get me wrong, I love me my romance novels and I love heated sex scenes, they just need to work. When they do work, I don’t care about nippleage or wombage (ok, I care, but I am able to let it pass just like you do) . Bottom line: the sex simply did not work in this book.

  • Wendy
    June 10, 2009 at 3:03 am

    Gah! I’m not reading this book, it certainly doesn’t sound like something I would enjoy, with the hungry wombs and such. Nooo, thanks!

    Loved the review, though! 😀

  • Gerd Duerner
    June 10, 2009 at 5:01 am

    First off, do not enter me in the draw because neither would I read it nor do I know anybody that would possibly enjoy it.

    Reading some other reviews about the book I must say that peoples idea of ‘erotic’ varies a lot, but it takes all kinds of people, right? Anyways, after reading that the author stems from the Ellora’s Cave family I was less surprised regarding the main ‘quality’ of the book.
    I guess it would be fairplay to put something on the cover like “From Ellora’s Cave author bla bla”
    Now ‘twisted’ seems not to be the worst choice of descriptive words for the book, ‘kinky’ comes to mind too, and after reading the excerpt for the sequel on her site I can even believe ‘bleak’, for other reasons though.

    I agree on the cover, it’s a lovely picture that gives a completly false impression of the book, it looks definitively YA. Makes you wonder what the Marketing people had on their mind, they probably only read the blurb, or they wanted to give the kink readers something innocent looking that you can walk around in the open with, other than with those mostly innocent Urbans that use daring covers to lure you in.
    ’tis crazy. 🙂

  • katiebabs
    June 10, 2009 at 5:23 am

    Vagina Dentata?? OMFG!! You two crack me up. I will be the minority voice and say yes, I enjoyed this book. Loved it. Loved the creamy aching womb Rose had for Gareth even though Gareth does come across as a bit of a slimy fop. As for Ambrose, I wanted the orges to eat him.
    Give me The Prince of Frogs! I need to know more of Gareth and Rose’s marriage and all their creamy aching goodness.

  • katiebabs
    June 10, 2009 at 5:24 am

    One last point, I think the publisher is being very sneaky because I was lead to believe this was a YA novel also. But again I enjoyed the book. What can I say? *ninja KB out*

  • KMont
    June 10, 2009 at 5:29 am

    But.. BUT the book was billed as a fantasy. Mainstream fantasy. “historical urban fantasy”????

    Ahhhhhh!!!!!!!! Nooooooooooooooo. No.

    I’ve been enjoying some awesome fantasy right now witha kick but heroine who has a love interest and the sex isn’t leaping off the pages to try to devour me for gosh sakes. The only thing pebbling in that series is, well, pebbles.

    Holy crap fest on whole wheat toast, I had no clue from previous reviews what this book was really all about. I’m honestly just stunned. I fully expected, from the back blurb to all the hype, that this was a fantasy novel. Is this another clear case of genre mislabeling? I mean, besides the attempt to whip out that “historical urban fantasy” one?

    Best review/discussion I’ve read all month, ladies. And you threw in my man, Picard – I freaking howled!

    Sorry, but you couldn’t pay me to read this book (sort of like how yall won’t touch the BDB teehee). Dare or no dare, it’s not working, I’ve got the fingers in the ears and everything and am drowning it out.

  • KMont
    June 10, 2009 at 5:36 am

    The thing is, too, if this was meant to be written as a ROMANCE, it should have been called that from the starting gate. That’s why things like creamy, dreamy thighs and other oozing orfices will throw some readers for a loop. Who the heck is going to expect that from the cover blurb? The fact that two men are mentioned. Pffffttt. Plenty of fantasy has love interests in them, but they don’t try to eat the book with their sexual appetites.

    And I’m a romance reader, too, but that doesn’t mean every single aching hooha and pebbling turgid nipple is going to work in a story.

    It really all is about the context and it sounds like this one just needed a big ‘ole re-labeling.

  • AAJ
    June 10, 2009 at 5:54 am

    I’d be really curious to read it. I like books that prompt discussions, even if that discussion involves the ups and downs of creamy thighs.

    But seriously, you make it sound so bad I can’t help but want to read it.

    And I do like dark and twisted…

  • azteclady
    June 10, 2009 at 6:17 am

    For the love of all that’s holy, DO NOT ENTER ME in the drawing, thankyou.

    I had to comment, though: this was marketed as YA fantasy???

  • Stacy ~
    June 10, 2009 at 6:27 am

    Wow. It’s like a trainwreck I shouldn’t be gaping at but cannot look away. Please do NOT enter me in the contest, even though I shamefully almost want to read it just to confirm how bad it is on so many levels, but no. I will refrain. Shudder.

  • Lynne Connolly
    June 10, 2009 at 6:30 am

    The 1750’s was a wonderful time, and I’ve been in love with it for ever.
    So thanks for the warning. I thought, from the cover, that it was a medieval fantasy based book, because dude, swords were foils and epees by then, not those huge battle things, and ladies never wore their hair loose. They did fence, but I’m not sure that’s what she meant. The clothes are all wrong. And how did she fight in a hooped skirt?
    Not sure Horace Walpole and ogres compute. Lady Mary Wortley Montagu would have scared any ogre rigid.
    Not sure I want to know.

  • Jeff
    June 10, 2009 at 6:31 am

    I’m tossing my hat into the ring basically just to see if I can finish the things without ripping the books in half and burning the neighborhood down. It’s a win/win: if I can’t, you get property destruction, and if I can, you get to read my excoriatingly snarky reviews of the things.

  • Pam S
    June 10, 2009 at 7:31 am

    Okay I am curious about this book (well books to inc Prince’s Frog). It has actually been on my wishlist for a few weeks but just hadn’t made it around to purchasing.

    After reading how bad you thought it was I am at a cross roads to even both picking it up. The furred part didn’t sound like to much of a turn on for sure …

    Please enter me. I’d like to see if it/they are as bad as you find them.

  • Elyane
    June 10, 2009 at 7:48 am

    You made me laugh so hard with your comments, that I now want to read the books. Like Bridget said “I read this book & spent 90% of the time laughing”, maybe it’s worth the read just to have a laugh.

    I’m ready to give it a try if you pick me.

  • Cybercliper
    June 10, 2009 at 8:06 am

    Ok guys, I’ll stick my neck out here, but I read Night’s Rose and liked it. Really liked it. Like someone said earlier the sex stuff is pretty typical of what’s in a lot of the romance genre, and to be honest it’s actually quite tame compared to some others.

    I would LOVE to win the PRINCE OF FROGS. Someone on another board suggested that the author might be going to take the storyline to a Gareth, Rose, and Ambrose three-way – I hope not because then I’ll definitely be off this authors work.

  • AnimeJune
    June 10, 2009 at 8:08 am

    OH GOD. DO NOT ENTER ME IN THIS CONTEST.

    Ew ew ew ew! I LOVE your review, but it really hammered it home that this is NOT a book I want to read. This is actually the reason I’ve kinda stopped reading Lisa Kleypas’ stuff – I HATE romances where the heroine can be led around by her clitoris, where she’ll have objections or inhibitions or IMPORTANT WORLD SAVING STUFF TO DO, but oh, one heated glance towards her (according to this review) magical reproductive dairyfarm of a nether cavern and she’s a total slave. Ugh.

    Prince of Frogs is the next book? Oh god – let me guess: is there going to toad-licking to get high in this story? Frog sex? Are we going to have to deal with membranes and fertilized eggs and webbed toes here????

  • Jessica
    June 10, 2009 at 8:08 am

    Thanks, Ana, for explaining. My suspicion was (semi) correct! FWIW, I was noticing in the last Sherry Thomas I read that she seemed much more restrained on that score than others I have been reading lately.

    Oh, and I did not see this was a contest. No need to enter my name. Got plenty in the TBR pile.

  • Ana
    June 10, 2009 at 8:15 am

    Cybercliper – Fair enough. With regards to the menage though, I think she is totally going to go there. I didn’t fdinish the book , but I read the last page and Rose does muse about having one with the two guys. I wouldn’t be surprised if she did.

    AnimeJune: “magical reproductive dairyfarm of a nether cavern”? 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆

  • Jacqueline L.
    June 10, 2009 at 8:17 am

    First off, DON’T count this as an entry to the giveaway.

    Wow. I did NOT see that kinda story coming. That isn’t the genre it was marketed as and certainly not what I was expecting. I wouldn’t like surprises like that either.

    Lynne Connolly –

    Horace Walpole and ogres

    Okay, that boggles the mind. 😯

  • katiebabs
    June 10, 2009 at 8:18 am

    OH NO! Please no threesome with that asswipe Ambrose! If that happened, I would throw the book against the wall.

  • Jacqueline L.
    June 10, 2009 at 8:20 am

    Oh, forgot to say how much I love your pic of Picard!

    No, this isn’t an entry to the giveaway either. 😀

  • Ana
    June 10, 2009 at 8:23 am

    Aztec Lady – NO, it was not marketed as YA – it was marketed as Fantasy. I also saw some reference as to it being URBAN Fantasy (although a lot of it is set in rural England and Europe) .

    Some readers thought it was YA because of the cover.

  • Diana Peterfreund
    June 10, 2009 at 8:25 am

    Jessica and Ana, I read a *ton* of romance, and I only rarely come across mentions of “cream” and “wombs” (outside of the context of pregnancy) — that stuff totally turns me off, too. Perhaps I’m lucky? Or maybe I just gravitate to the ones who write different kinds of sex scenes.

    Also, in defense of the hundreds of EC authors, you can pretty much find any kind of prose you want in their erotic romance — purple, crude, understated — name your flavor.

  • Doug Knipe [SciFiGuy]
    June 10, 2009 at 8:42 am

    Oh dear and I have this book sitting in my TBR pile because of all those same positive reviews. Not sure if I want to spend the time reading this now just to confirm what I a sure are very accurate observations.

  • azteclady
    June 10, 2009 at 9:18 am

    Okay so it wasn’t marketed as YA, but there was enough confusion in the marketing that most people didn’t realize its high erotic content, did I get that right?

    [and, I repeat, do NOT enter me in the drawing]

  • Renee
    June 10, 2009 at 9:19 am

    Yes, I am one of those who love Night’s Rose! 😳

    However, I think you are right in it’s misleading genre tag. Erotic historical urban fantasy would have been much more correct, and for many people who come to it from a uf or traditional fantasy mindset, or even a mainstream romance mindset, for that matter, “erotic” would/should have been the most prominent.

    I’m not crazy about certain phrases or words (“cream” is one of them,) but when I read erotic romance I tend to shrug when I see them.

    I guess since my reading tastes are all over the place, I didn’t really think about it when writing my review. I see how important it is to be really clear (for me as a reviewer) about issues like this. Especially, as more and more books are hybrid sub genre types of books.

    Tho’ I’m bummed you guys hated it, I appreciated the post for some good food for thought.

    And, PLEASE enter me in the drawing. I gave my copy of Night’s Rose away, and am dying to read The Prince of Frogs. 😆

  • MaryK
    June 10, 2009 at 9:44 am

    I’m sorry to hear this! I’m also a fan of fairytale retellings and haven’t come across many good ones. Considering the review, I don’t really want to read the book, but I am curious enough to want to see how well our tastes match.

  • Adrienne
    June 10, 2009 at 11:05 am

    Ugh, that sucks… I love the Sleeping Beauty story. I got to tell you I laughed so hard when you had Capt. John-Luk and the WTF. Holy cow that was really great! And seriously, are they having sex or applying yeast infection cream? Cream running down legs?? Come on, are we in high school. Another point, do you think it was written by two different people, one mail and female? That would possible explain the different voice from the begining to the middle? Just a thought

  • AmyC
    June 10, 2009 at 11:08 am

    Thanks for linking to my review of this book. I don’t really know what to say about your joint review! I thought the book was pretty darn good :). Funny, how we can feel so differently about the same book!

    I would love to win The Prince of Frogs!! LOL

  • Anna
    June 10, 2009 at 11:22 am

    Wow! That was some review you guys. I too enjoyed reading Night’s Rose. It isn’t the best book out there, but I still thought it was a good story. I would love the chance to win book two.

  • Sandy M
    June 10, 2009 at 11:42 am

    Well, after all that I’m just plain curious! I want to read them now just to make up my own mind.

  • Terri W.
    June 10, 2009 at 11:55 am

    You guys crack me up with your review of this book and now I definately would love to win a copy of “Night’s Rose and “The Prince of Frogs”.

    Please enter me in the contest!

    Thanks!

  • Danielle
    June 10, 2009 at 1:24 pm

    Why do I want to read it…?

    Well, I’m always up for a good laugh…

    Also, I have this thing where I must constantly prove people wrong, no matter how simply right they are. For instance, if you were to tell me a movie was HORRIBLE I would watch it several times just to find something good about it (even if it is horrible) and rub in your face. If my argument makes no sense whatsoever, then I will gladly bow down to your feet and admit you are THE BOSS when if somes to opinons. Or soemthing.

    Or, you know, just the laugh thing.

  • orannia
    June 10, 2009 at 1:32 pm

    Vagina Dentata, baby

    You two crack me up – the use of ‘Vagina Dentata’ and Jean-Luc Picard was inspiring to say the least 🙂

    I’m still stuck on the fact that Ambrose stood and watched while Rose was raped (and did I read the word repeatedly?) and did NOTHING…and she STILL loved him? WTF? If I was Rose I would take that big shiny sword and *censored*

    I don’t think it is fair to inflict postage fees on you on top of your having to survive reading the book, so please don’t enter me in your contest (although I’ve very grateful). Hmmmm. My library has ordered a copy, so I can always try it…

    And I agree with the labelling issue. It has obvious been mislabelled.

  • dag888888
    June 10, 2009 at 3:03 pm

    If I win this, I will give this to my teen! Thanks!

  • Bridget Locke
    June 10, 2009 at 3:13 pm

    Had to add…I don’t mind heroines who are kick-butt, but are also attracted to hero (thinking heroines from Nalini Singh here), but there’s such a thing as turning into a broodmare. I like my heroines tough, even if they’re supposed to be society misses. Milquetoast and boring DO NOT work for me at all.

    Also, being led around by the clitoris is not only dangerous, but painful as well. 😛

  • chris swan
    June 10, 2009 at 5:22 pm

    Sounds like an interesting laugh. I would love to see if I could make it thru it.

  • jennygirl
    June 10, 2009 at 5:26 pm

    lol! No thank you. Just wanted to say this post cracked me up. Oh wait, are my nipples are hard now too? ha-ha
    And the Jean Luc Picard pic is priceless 🙂

  • Kristen
    June 10, 2009 at 5:44 pm

    Please don’t enter me in the contest since this does not at all sound like my cup of tea. I just had to say great review and you two crack me up. It’s too bad since I love fairy tale retellings also, and at the beginning of your review I was very intrigued. A story featuring the heroine’s nipples so much that they’re practically their own character fails to appeal, though…

  • Samantha
    June 10, 2009 at 6:00 pm

    Haha! 😆
    I read this awhile ago because I liked the cover and thought the premise sounded interesting. I was totally surprised (and not in a good way). It was a DNF for me, too.

    I think this book is a victim of poor marketing. And heck, if you like it, more power to you! I just couldn’t get past the constant TMI feeling. 😯

  • FD
    June 10, 2009 at 7:09 pm

    Ok – Please don’t count this as a contest entry, even though I had intended to read it, being as I love books that revisit myths.

    Samantha said:I think this book is a victim of poor marketing.
    I’ve been noting this a lot lately.
    A distressing amount of UF/historical fantasy being produced has taken elements of the fantasy genre but missed understanding that the plot-drivers for a fantasy or sf novel are entirely different to the plot drivers for romance or erotica. Doesn’t mean you can’t crossover successfully, but it does mean that the author needs to understand that the relationship aspect of the book must to be superseded by the external plot. Otherwise anyone who is coming from a fantasy/sf background is going to throw the book at the wall. Which is what sounds like happened here.

  • Tiah
    June 10, 2009 at 8:11 pm

    Wow. This book sounds like some of the naughty ebooks I buy when my hubby is working late. 😉

  • KMont
    June 11, 2009 at 6:22 am

    FD, you hit it on the head. Well said. I’d only add that the publisher, or those working with the author specifically, need to understand that “the relationship aspect of the book must to be superseded by the external plot”, if they are indeed wanting to label the book a fantasy of any kind.

  • Meghan
    June 11, 2009 at 6:27 am

    Yikes. I do read romance, but I prefer ones with less sex or at least sex that advances the plot and is tastefully written. I don’t like when it’s all about the erotic tension. Sounds like this is not a book for me, so please don’t enter me – great joint DNF review though!

  • Anonymous
    June 11, 2009 at 6:46 am

    Your horror at the unstoppable torrent of nipples in this book amused the hell out of me, so sign me up.

    (Excessive amounts of lame attempts at sexiness wind me up, but I feel masochistic and I have to admit I’m curious.)

    Glorious use of Picard, by the way.

  • KT
    June 11, 2009 at 6:47 am

    Oh, and comment 49 is me, I’m just apparently a muppet today who forgets your comment form doesn’t automatically require a name and email address to post. XD

  • JenB
    June 11, 2009 at 9:27 am

    Wow. 😯 I think this may be my favorite review on your blog so far! 😀 The vagina dentata thing made me snort out loud.

    And now I’m curious, too. Go ahead and put my name in the hat if I’m not too late. I might have to give this one a whirl.

  • Roxy
    June 11, 2009 at 9:32 am

    Wow, I can’t tell you guys how many times I burst out laughing at this review. You guys are hysterical! This book sounds absolutely horrible. Thanks for the review!

  • Missy
    June 11, 2009 at 10:18 am

    In all fairness, the book was published by Tor as part of their Fantasy ROMANCE line. That really should be a tip-off, I think.

    I really enjoyed the book. I thought Rose was a great character, mature and with depth. While I agree not all the sex scenes were exactly my cup of tea, on the whole I liked it. To each their own. 🙂

  • Ana
    June 11, 2009 at 11:12 am

    Missy: I have an ARC of the book and along with it, a promotional leaflet from Tor (a very pretty leaflet by the way) that clearly says:

    “Though multi-published in other genres, Annaliese is thrilled to be writing historical urban fantasy for Tor/Forge. Her “Night’s Rose” series is set in the 18th century and features the real Sleeping Beauty, ogre slayer Rosemarie Edenburg.”

    How is that not false advertsiment. How could I NOT have certain expectation about what I would find? ❓

  • Maria
    June 13, 2009 at 1:58 pm

    Your review is HILARIOUS. Enjoyed it thoroughly. For retold fairy tales you might try Jim Hines Stepsister Scheme. It’s not romance (there’s a small romantic element, but it covers Cinderella–after the marriage!) –it’s fantasy and deals with three separate fairy tales (there’s an emphasis on retelling–filling in the holes and what-ifs) It’s very much adventure.

    I reviewed the first in the series over at BSCreview — I think you might like the series. (I haven’t looked to see if you have already read it–you’ve read an enormous amount of books!!!)

    Jim has an excerpt on his site:
    http://www.jimchines.com/

    The second is…either out or about to come out in a couple of months.

    Maria

  • Maria
    June 13, 2009 at 4:02 pm

    Oh–I didn’t know there was a contest going on (or finished) for the book–no need to enter me if it is ongoing!

    Thanks!

  • Genre Labels and Why I’m Their Fan Girl «
    July 20, 2009 at 5:35 am

    […] short while back, The Book Smugglers reviewed Night’s Rose by Annaliese Evans, a retelling of Sleeping Beauty complete with goblins. Amazon.com labels it as a […]

  • Genre Labels and Why I’m Their Fan Girl, Part Deux «
    July 21, 2009 at 10:36 am

    […] it paranormal romance. The publisher (according to an official promotional leaflet provided to The Book Smugglers for review) called it historical urban fantasy. Finally, upon reviewing it, The Book Smugglers […]

  • Acredula » The border between our world, another world and AU
    November 17, 2009 at 4:04 pm

    […] Rose by Annaliese Evans is one of those books in my opinion. The Booksmugglers posted a review of the book and I’m inclined to agree with them when Thea says; Furthermore, all of the […]

  • Seahn
    January 7, 2010 at 5:18 am

    I was going to buy this one but wanted to know more so searched for reviews. I came across this one and realized immediately that Night’s Rose was not what I expected nor wanted,I have nothing against erotica just found this really weird.
    The disturbing thing is that at a local bookstore it is in the romantic general section (there isn’t much to the store) where younger teens frequent and (where anyone) could purchase unaware of it’s content and be traumatized.

  • Katie
    February 1, 2011 at 11:29 am

    Um yeah I never made it past chapter 1.

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