Happy Saturday, everyone!

Courtesy of ABC Family, we have an awesome giveaway for two TV Shows that also happen to be books – The Secret Life of An American Teenager and Pretty Little Liars.

The Secret Life of the American Teenager

About the Show: Just about every teenager at one time or another feels like an outsider, as if nobody in the world understands them, especially their parents. The Secret Life of the American Teenager focuses on the complex relationships between teenagers and their families, as well as dealing with the issue of teen pregnancy and the fallout among the teens and their friends.

About the Book: The Secret Diary of Ashley Juergens is a new book inspired by Secret Life that goes on sale June 15, 2010.

I got called into Principal Miller’s office again. She handed me a notebook. This notebook. She told me keeping a journal is an excellent way to express oneself. So I have to write in this stupid thing and turn it in at the end of each month.

Little does she know what she’s in for. With everything that’s been going on—Amy’s band camp pregnancy, my parents’ divorce, a secret wedding—it’s practically one- stop shopping for all your Grant High gossip needs.

Property of Ashley Juergens. Read at your own risk (especially you, Amy).

All new episodes of The Secret Life Of The American Teenager air on ABC Family’s Mondays at 8/7c. You can read more about the show (and check out a ton of extras) online at the official website HERE.

Pretty Little Liars

About the Show: Pretty Little Liars is the newest original ABC Family series airing Tuesday nights at 8/7c, and stars Lucy Hale [Privileged], Troian Bellisario [NCIS], Shay Mitchell, Ashley Benson [Eastwick, Days Of Our Lives], Laura Leighton [Melrose Place], and Chad Lowe [24].

Rosewood is a perfect little town. So quiet and pristine, you’d never guess it holds so many secrets. Some of the ugliest ones belong to the prettiest girls in town — Aria, Spencer, Hanna and Emily, four estranged friends whose darkest secrets are about to unravel.

One year ago, Alison, the Queen Bee of their group, disappeared and the girls swore they’d never tell what really happened that night. They thought their secrets would bond them together, but just the opposite is true. Then again, who’s to say what the truth is in Rosewood. It seems everyone in town is lying about something.

Now, as the mystery surrounding Alison’s disappearance resurfaces, the girls begin getting messages from “A,” saying – and threatening – things only Alison would know. But it couldn’t be Alison. Could it? Whoever it is, they seem to know all the girls’ secrets, and seem to be watching their every move. The girls are friends again, but will they be there for each other if their dark secrets come to light?

About the Book: Pretty Little Liars is a young adult novel by Sara Shepard, and has been reissued with a new cover.

Everyone has something to hide—especially high school juniors spencer, aria, emily, and hanna.

Spencer covets her sister’s boyfriend. Aria’s fantasizing about her English teacher. Emily’s crushing on the new girl at school. Hanna uses some ugly tricks to stay beautiful.

But they’ve all kept an even bigger secret since their friend Alison vanished.

How do I know? Because I know everything about the bad girls they were, the naughty girls they are, and all the dirty secrets they’ve kept. And guess what? I’m telling.

You can read more about the show at its official website HERE, and more about the series of books at the author’s official site HERE.

THE GIVEAWAY

Courtesy of ABC Family, we are giving away a ton of awesome Pretty Little Liars and The Secret Life of the American Teenager swag. We’ve got two prize packs up for grabs.

PRIZE 1: SECRET LIFE

• One copy of The Secret Diary of Ashley Juergens, a brand new book available June 15 from Hyperion Books
• The Secret Life Of The American Teenager Volume 1 on DVD
• The Secret Life Of The American Teenager Volume 2 on DVD

PRIZE 2: PRETTY LITTLE LIARS

• Pretty Little Liars tote bag
• A newly re-released copy of Pretty Little Liars by Sara Shepard featuring the ABC Family show’s key art on the cover

The giveaway is open to residents of the United States, and will run until tonight at 11:59 PM (PST). Only ONE entry per person (that means I.P. address too), please! ALL Multiple entries (even if it is just for clarification) will be automatically disqualified. To enter, simply leave a comment here telling us which show you watch and why (or which show you’d like to watch and why). Good luck!

As you may have heard, this past weekend the LA Times Festival of Books took place at my alma mater, UCLA.

Over the weekend of April 24th – 25th, thousands of book lovers, authors, book sellers, publishers and other industry folks made their way to Westwood. And I’m happy to report that I was one of the throng, thoroughly enjoying the (basically) free panels, stages, author signings, book tents, and other assorted bibliophile paraphernalia. I’ve been going to the LA Times Festival of Books since I was a wee baby froshling, but this is the first time I’ve gone with the intent and capacity to blog about it – so it’s kinda cool. And new. And different.

Here are my adventures in the wild hills of Westwood (the 2010 edition):

Day 1: Saturday, April 24, 2010

After dragging the poor, reluctant boyfriend (who is soooooo not a reader) with me to the festival (hereafter LATFOB), finding a place to park, and hiking our sorry asses to campus (we’re both UCLA grads, so it was something of an eerie experience), we finally got situated and mapped out what areas we needed to hit immediately. First on the list was…

Mark Waid in conversation with Jonah Weiland – Saturday 1PM, Etc. stage

It’s no surprise that we Smugglers are a fan of Mark Waid’s – Ana’s recently given rave reviews for his Boom! Studios original “superhero” comic, Irredeemable (Vol 1 & 2), and of course we are both fans of his multiple Eisner Award-winning Kingdom Come, of his 52, and other remarkable works. The fact that Jonah Weiland, executive producer of the always excellent Comic Book Resources was the interviewer? Well, that just added icing to the cake. As a relatively newbie to the comic scene and someone that hasn’t been to many author events in the past, it was quite a treat to see these two in conversation!

Amongst the topics Mr. Weiland and Mr. Waid covered were the idea of comic books and their rise to fame, especially on the Hollywood front. Comics adapted to movies are increasingly popular, as major studios in film and television push out multiple adaptations a year, when there used to be only one every few years. Both men remarked that they do not think the bubble is going to burst any time soon, and that it will take more than a few box office duds (hello The Spirit, Ghostrider, Superman Returns) to staunch the flow. I found it kinda funny and really cool that Mark Waid admitted that when he heard that Iron Man was going to be adapted to the big screen, he (and other industry pros) kind of laughed and did a, “good luck with that.” If it weren’t for Robert Downey Jr.’s perfection as Tony Stark, Iron Man would not be the phenomenon that it now is – and I tend to side with Mr. Waid on that front. On the movie note as well, both men have high hopes for Green Lantern…

Also discussed were the digital application of comics in the form of Motion Comics, which neither Jonah nor Mark seemed to be very enthusiastic about (if you’ve seen the Watchmen motion comic with its weirdo voiceovers, you’d totally get why). But both were supportive of the move to digital media for actual comics themselves, via the iPad, and other webcomics.

Unfortunately, not a single mention, not even a passing throwout of female superheroes was made during the full hour.

Other observations and musings:

- Apparently, though Batman is the fan favorite (according to a good majority of the audience, myself included), Mark Waid says we are ALL wrong and Supe’ is where it’s at.

- Mark Waid thinks of himself as an incurable optimist – with the overarching theme of “hope” running through all his books. Which is pretty uplifting, given that a lot of books (comic and prose alike) tend to take the more jaded, cynical approach.

- Of all his work, Waid’s favorite, most notable accomplishment is his first issue of Fantastic Four.

- WIll Waid do 52 again in the future? Only if the dream team reunites.

In terms of future projects, Mark Waid talked about Boom! – he hopes that his Irredeemable universe will continue to grow over the next few years (also, Waid wearing a sweet Irredeemable hat). In the pipeline is a Stan Lee collaborative project which sounds really gorram cool – Stan is starting a line with Boom to create an ENTIRELY NEW universe of superheroes. How freakin’ awesome is that?

Overall, I was really, super impressed by both Jonah and Mark. They seemed like nice, sharp, funny guys – and I got my own copies of Irredeemable (volumes 1 & 2) signed by Mark Waid after the panel, after only a few name misspelling issues.

Then, it was on to…

Blood, Fangs, and Temptation: Everything Vampire with Richelle Mead, Rachel Caine, Heather Brewer, & Melissa de la Cruz
Moderated by Aaron Hartzier

I only stopped by this stage pretty quickly to listen to Rachel Caine (one of my favorite contemporary UF authors) and Richelle Mead – and both ladies were undeniably cool. Everyone read an excerpt from their latest book, talked a bit about vampires in fiction and their own particular series’. I tried to stick around to get books signed at the end of the event, but holy CRAP was the line long. The stage itself was super crowded, and considering this was the first year the LATFOB had a YA stage, it was pretty impressive – and indicative of the popularity of YA fiction overall. For while there were many eager, fangirl teens at the event, there were also some equally eager mothers and older readers (like myself), eating up what each of these talented authors had to say.

The Bloggers…

After a long, sun-drenched day of squirming my way through crowds (SERIOUSLY, the crowds were so thick and muggy that it was like how I imagine being born feels), I made my back to Westwood to meet with a delightful group of bloggers. Even though we don’t necessarily read the same books, these were some sweet ladies (and gentleman) – so a huge thank you to Lisa (Books on the Brain), Florinda (3R’s Blog), Ti (Book Chatter), Amy (My Friend Amy), Danielle Smith (There’s a Book), Trish (Hey, Lady!), Jen (Jen’s Book Thoughts), Jill (Fizzy Thoughts), Leah Hasenoehrl (Amused by Books), and Ashley (Ashley’s Library).

Day 2: Sunday, April 25, 2010

Day 2 of the LATFOB proved even more action packed than the first – this was the day I explored every tent on campus (multiple times for some), and ended up buying a few books (gaaaaaaaaaah).

Books Purchased include Feed by Mira Grant (YESSSS!!!! Love Seanan McGuire!) and Boy Proof by the remarkable Cecil Castelucci (every geek girl’s hero). Also walking around I stumbled upon VMK Fewings, author of A Stone Master’s Reckoning, which I reviewed last year. Vanessa had her very own (very coolly decorated!) booth, and even remembered who I was and gave me a free copy of her new book. SQUEE!

As for the day’s panels…

Comic Books: Indie and Beyond with Ed Brubaker, Simon Oliver & Mike Mignola
Moderator: Geoff Boucher

When I saw that Mike Mignola was on a panel, it was an autobuy for me. You may have noticed that we Smugglers love Hellboy. And with another big name in Ed Brubaker (Captain America writer, at the moment) and Simon Oliver, I was sold. This panel was interesting, especially in comparison to Mark Waid’s interview the day before – while Waid was funny and more softspoken, this crew was more boisterous. Less interested in superheroes, and moregenerally chatty. After seeing how hopeful/non-cynical Mark Waid was, it was funny to hear Ed Brubaker, who is a wryly cynical as they come (but not necessarily in a bad way). Ed Brubaker was late to the panel.

Mike Mignola is awesome, incredibly humble and wonderful, and he kinda looks like a friendly Tom Colicchio. He talked a bit about what he’s working on – he just came back from a 10 day stint in New Zealand helping with a segment of Guillermo del Toro’s The Hobbit, and hopefully his work will make the final cut. SImon Oliver (of The Exterminators fame) was kind of marginalized, but funny and interesting when he did speak.

On new projects – Brubaker talked about how he lost a pilot he wrote specifically and originally for TV; but has Secret Avengers out later this year (and a follow up to Incognito – which is awesome – later too). I’m super stoked for Mignola’s new chapter in Hellboy/BPRD (as Hellboy has quit, and apparently we can expect LOTS of changes). Simon Oliver has a new crime noir book out at somepoint soon, but can’t remember the artist’s name (a huge LOL moment).

Following the panel, I got to meet up with Kris, awesome book blogger behind Voracious YAppetite – who shares a LOT of the same YA interests as Ana and I. We met briefly at the YA Stage (after I mistakenly harassed a girl that fit Kris’s clothes description – whoops), and talked about our book plans before bullying an innocent bystander into taking a picture of us. All in all, a fun time!

After that, it was time for my last panel of the event – and the most entertaining one, at that.

Book: New Media Meets Publishing with Pablo Defendini, Dana Goodyear & Wil Wheaton
Moderated by Carolyn Kellogg

For pretty obvious reasons, I was most looking forward to this panel addressing New Media and publishing, especially since I (kind of) know one of the panelists. Pablo Defendini is someone Ana and I knew from Tor.com. Recently (as in, one month ago) he left the MacMillan imprint to join Open Road Integrated Media (the new, e-book company brainchild of Jane Friedman, former CEO of HarperCollins). And, in person, (well, from my audience seat) Pablo is freakin’ AWESOME. He even used headdesking in a sentence. Come on now. (And, I might mention, in a festival FULL of mystery/crime/thrillers and literary fiction, it was cool to hear from a fellow SF/F geek – name droppin’ Scalzi, Gaiman, Elliot and others!)

Wil Wheaton, actor, blogger, self-published author is adorable and really, *really* goddamn funny. Like, integrating LOLCAT speech funny. Poking fun at stuck-in-the-1900s-publishers funny. He had a lot to say about self publishing that doubtless helped many aspiring authors in the audience.

Dana Goodyear had a lot to say too about her work – she’s a regular contributor to the New Yorker and founder of Figment, a new mobile platform for readers and writers of young-adult fiction, based on the bestselling Japanese form of cell-phone novels. Figment sounds pretty cool – although I’m not sure how well it will work out in its early days here in the United States (especially considering Japan’s very…different culture of cellphones), but it’s an intriguing, forward thinking concept. And we’ll be keeping our eye on Figment, which launches this summer.

Of all the panelists, Pablo was the most enlightening. One of the most interesting things he talked about was how when they launched Tor.com (which I remember like it was yesterday!), the site offered free e-books – the first book in assorted SF/F series’ (i.e. Scalzi’s Old Man’s War, Kate Elliot’s Spirit Gate) – which panelist Carolyn Kellogg likened to the pusher mentality of “the first hit’s free” (hilarious). Pablo then talked about how after that first hit DID the job, at Tor he started getting desperate requests from readers that WANTED to pay money for the ebook version of the rest of the books in the series – but were for, whatever reason *cough*MacMillan*cough* unavailable in e-book format. Pablo described this as the most headdesking moment evah.

Other tidbits of note:

- PDFs suck for e-books (duh). Mobi should be taken out back and shot, placed in a shallow grave. EPUB is sooooo where it’s at.

- Thieves will always be thieves; but people WILL buy e-books and print copies too. Whether it is a print “souvenir” (as Dana Goodman says of Japanese readers that purchased the prose versions of the cellphone novels they participated in) or to just have a concrete copy of a book, or if it’s a Scott Sigler type of deal (who changes his story with each iteration of a book – and his books are awesome by the way. Start out with Earthcore).

- A lot of people are driven to illegal downloads because they have no other alternative! This especially applies to international readers…which is something, as an international blog, we can relate to.

- They touched on pricing of ebooks – how people do not want to pay these expensive dollar amounts for books. Inherently, people know that spending the same amount of money on a print book as an e-book just doesn’t make any sense. (And on that note, the moderator kind of misses the point by suggesting that people who have already spent hundreds on a reader should be able to afford to give authors a few more bucks…yeaaaaah, that’s not quite the issue at hand. If I’ve paid hundreds of dollars for an e-reader, you damn well better bet that I want MORE bang for my buck, and I am not going to be complacent paying ridiculously inflated costs for an electronic version of a book that should by virtue of common sense be cheaper than its printed counterpart.)

The coolest thing about this panel? I saw Trish of Hey Lady! walking in, and we grabbed a seat together. Which made for a fun panel, especially with some of the…colorful characters in attendance.

Gripes about the Festival:

This was a great, fun weekend, no doubt about it. I was SO stoked to see a YA stage and YA section this year 0 and holy crap it was crowded all weekend long!

My only gripe, however, was that there was shockingly ZERO representation for Speculative Fiction (that is SF/F/H). I love that comics are becoming a bigger part of the festival, even earning their own graphic novel award this year, but….come on dudes. SF/F/H is a HUGE market too, with tons of die hard fans. Don’t we deserve a little reppin’ too?

On that note, there was ZERO Romance either! As Ana is a romance reader, and as I have many blogging buds that are dedicated romance readers and reviewers, and considering that romance is the best selling genre of fiction, period, this strikes me as a bit bizarre. There’s something wrong with this picture.

Hopefully next year, we’ll see some better representation. And who knows? Maybe even a panel about blogging or something of the like!

Overall, a successful, lovely weekend. Next stop – BEA!

Last year, it was the glorious What’s Your Scott and Jean event – in which several geeky bloggers got together to talk about their geek sacred cow. Now, the good folks at Alert Nerd are back with another Mega-Blog Crossover Event. And this year, the theme is…..True Geek Confessions:

The Background: Unpopular opinions: we all have them. Sometimes you stand alone in loving a super niche-y run of a popular comic book series (like Sarah and her Tefe Holland thing). Sometimes you’re the only person on the entire planet to ’ship a certain ’ship. Sometimes you simply Do Not Get a movie the rest of your geeky brethren is falling all over themselves about. And because a lot of fandom is about sharing loves and hates and communing with your fellow geeks, this can feel awfully lonely. But perhaps if we confess our most unpopular opinions for all the internet to see…well, we’ll feel just a little bit better.

Here’s what you do: On February 17, write up a blog post with your own True Geek Confession. Send your link to sarah AT alertnerd DOT com. We will add you to our master list blog post and you can link back to said post. It will be exciting and wonderful and will hopefully not provoke too many “die in a fire” type arguments.

Of course, we Smugglers could not let the opportunity pass for another geek-out session in which we are to share our deepest, darkest, geekiest secrets ever. It is not going to be pretty, but with the Powers of Greyskull guiding us, we shall bare our souls to you! **NOTE: We are posting our entry a day early because of a scheduling conflict! So all you folks have an extra day to come up with your own Geek Confessions, should the mood strike!**

Ana

I will just go ahead and say it:

There. I said it. And I will not be ashamed of it.

I loved the Ewoks for years before I came to love Star Wars and, I didn’t even know this was an unpopular opinion until a few years ago when I finally watched the movies. Come to think of it, maybe my True Geek Confession should have been: I didn’t watch the original Start Wars trilogy until 1999 when I decided to get ready for the Phantom Menace ( I have no reason, no excuse for that I am afraid. I was lame, that is all. I hang my head in shame, please do not revoke my geek card?).

But anyways. Ewoks. I grew up watching the dudes. One of my favorite movies when I was a child was Caravan of Courage – that movie with the family stranded in Endor with the cute little sister befriending the Ewoks and the Ewoks helping them retuning with their parents?

It seemed to be on TV all the time and I watched it every single time. It is one of my fondest childhood memories and I can’t think of it without having a severe case of the sniffles.

I haven’t watched the movie in ages and I am not sure it will stand the test of times. But I am not sure I even want to know.

But then there was also the cartoon which was one of my favorites.

It was on in the mornings in the same children’s program that aired Dungeons and Dragons and Thundercats. Whenever I was able to stay home from school or when on holidays, I always tried to watch these!

So to me the Ewoks evoke childhood, the memories of watching television in the afternoon after doing homework, drinking milk with cookies. I associate it with good things, always. So when I finally watched The Return of the Jedi in a special session at the movies (pre Phantom Menace) with a bunch of friends who were Star Wars fanatics and I saw the Ewoks and I was like, “OMG the Ewoks, I love them” and my friends looked at me positively horrified and tried to explain to the newbie how the Ewoks destroyed the Return of the Jedi with their cuteness or some such bullshit I was just like “Yeah, yeah, whatever, talk to the hand.”

I love the Ewoks. That is my True Geek Confession. Who else is with me?

Thea:

First off, Ana, I am with you. I first saw Star Wars when I was a young girl of six, and I immediately loved Jawas, all the different droids, and, yeah, Ewoks. I still have my DVD of Caravan of Courage. *pumps fist in the air with Ana*

But that’s not my True Geek Confession.

My Official Confession is…

Seriously, I adore this movie. Why, you ask? It’s a Geek’s Wet Dream. Let me count the ways.

1. Sky High is essentially a young superhero story, in a sort of New Mutants/Teen Titans sensibility. You’ve got a universe where superheroes are commonly known and accepted, and kids with superpowers attend Sky High – a high school in the sky (that constantly moves location for the kids’ safety from super villains and the like). The movie follows Will Stronghold, son of superstar superheroes The Commander (gifted with super strength and invulnerability, played by Kurt Russell) and Jetstream (gifted with the power of flight, played by Kelley Preston), on his first day as a freshman at Sky High. All the freshman have to go through “Power Placement” – that is, they show Coach Boomer (a hilarious Bruce Campbell – who, incidentally, is the perfect I-take-myself-waaaaaaay-too-seriously Gym Coach) their superpower, and he determines whether they go on the Hero track, or the Sidekick track. That is, depending on how badass the kid’s superpower, he or she is relegated to a life of High School popularity and career prosperity….or nerdy mediocrity. Will has a LOT to live up to, as the son of two very famous superheroes, and he’s got a big problem: his superpower hasn’t manifested yet. It might not manifest at all. And he, along with his friends, are relegated to sidekick duty.

Of course, there’s a diabolical plan from an unlikely super villain (recruiting other young villains, world domination, etc). AND even better, romance, high school drama, best friends, the whole gamut. What is NOT to love about this awesome geekiness?

2. CASTING. Where else are you going to see Lynda Carter (aka Wonder Woman), Bruce Campbell (aka Ash), Kurt Russell (aka Snake, aka R.J. MacReady, aka Captain freakin’ Ron), Dave Foley (hey, Kids in the the Hall!), Kevin McDonald (hey, Kids in the Hall again!), Cloris Leachman (aka Phillys Lindstrom), and Kevin Hefferman (aka Farva) together in cheesy abandon?

And these are just the adults! The kids are fantastic too – I love the guy that plays hero Will, Michael Angarano (whom you may recently have seen in Gentlemen Broncos or The Forbidden Kingdom). Layla, played by Danielle Panabaker (of the crappy Friday the 13th remake) is awesome, as is Steven Strait (10,000 B.C., The Covenant, Stop-Loss). Made of WIN.

3. The kitschy names: Will Stronghold. Warren Peace. Gwen Greyson (for Gwen Stacy of Spidey fame and Dick Grayson of Batman fame). Principal Powers. Mr. Boy. Mr. Medulla. Royal Pain. You get the idea.

4. Little touches like the costumes/wardrobe and music. Each character has a specific color scheme: Will (and his mom and dad) only wears red, white, and blue. Layla, the hippie-ish girl with Poison Ivy caliber super powers over plants, only wears green. Magenta, surly girl that shapeshifts into a guinea pig, purple. Gwen Grayson, smart, popular, class president, wears pink. Etc, etc, etc.

All the boys in the film wear converse all stars for the entire film, in the color of their wardrobe (an homage to The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes, a Disney film from the 1960s starring Kurt Russell).

All the music is from the ’80s but recorded by new artists. It’s the little things that really stick out and make Sky High so much fun.

5. The high school movie awesomeness. There’s an unrequited love story, the pressure of living up to your parents’ legacy, the ever-present dichotomy between “cool kids” and “geeks,” high school nemeses, bullies, crazy teachers…you name it.

So there you have it. My love affair with Sky High is one that I am no longer ashamed to share! Yeah, it’s cheesy, yeah it’s Disney – but damn, it’s good. I watched it in the theater with my baby sister when it first came out and was hooked.

So there you have it! Our very own True Geek Confessions. Anyone that wants to make something of it, or share your own confession, we invite you to comment away. Remember, you can join in the posting fun – just write up your own True Geek Confession post and then shoot the link over to Alert Nerd.

As for us, we’ll be around. Now, excuse us while we watch our Caravan of Courage and Sky High dvds…

Lost will be back this Tuesday with a two-hour premiere starting its sixth and final season. There will be another 16 episodes and then ALL WILL BE OVER.

Excuse us while we have a moment.

Ok, we are back. After 5 seasons of mind blowing happenings, twists and turns, ghosts, psychics, physics, pseudo-physics, religious overtures, polar bears and boars and horses, time travel, deaths, births, The (ZOMBIE) Love Quadrangle of Doom (that nearly drove us insane), numbers, coincidences, fate, mumble jumble, whispers, hatches, Others, other others, villains, double crossings, WTfuckery and whatnots, we repeat: All Will Be Over.

Needless to say, we, as die-hard fans of the show since its inception, have high expectations for this last season. And there are a few things that we would like to see happening in our little screen in order to make us happy:

1) A Grand Unified Theory of Everything.

Physics geeks FTW! Darlton (that’s the ’ship name for writer/creators Damon Lindeloff and Carlton Cuse) have promised us a Lost GUT since the beginning, and we are going to be so incredibly pissed if it turns out to be any of the following: Snowglobe, Purgatory, Paradise Lost, All just a dream or whatever.

We’ll be even MORE PISSED if there is no Grand Unified Theory of Everything answer for everything that has happened so far.

We will be so mad if they give us nothing, or if they cop out with a Twilight Zone ending. If the writers simply say any of the following:

1. LOST island is just a weird island that moves around the south pacific because of electromagnetism
2. Jacob, Ghosts of People That Have Died, Smokey, et. al. are mere figments of the imagination brought on by electromagnetism
3. The whispers are completely forgotten (or are simply The Others)…or are sounds created by electromagnetism
4. Richard Alpert is just a lucky dude that has had a long life because he is on the island and can jump around because of…electromagnetism
5. The island heals people because….electromagnetism
6. Desmond can flash through time because….electromagnetism

TELL US WHAT THE POINT IS. No more pseudo “well, duh, it’s electromagnetism” crap! Is Lost Island an alien experiment that spawned all life and religion on earth? Is it Hell? You promised us a Grand Unified Theory DAMMIT, and you WILL DELIVER.

(Just so you know there are a grand total of 325 unanswered questions so far. You can read them all here)

That is really what we would like to see. Above all else. A measure of reasoning and sanity behind it all: the clear and unmistakable proof that there was a plan behind everything that we saw in this show. That we were not just jerked around for the sake of WTF!OMG!POLARBEAR moments. If we get ANSWERS, even if we don’t necessarily LIKE them, we will be happy campers indeed (ok maybe not happy campers per se, but you get our drift).

The rest will be icing on the cake, like:

2) A Measure of Happiness

These people have been through a lot. We mean, a lot. Yes, some of them do have reproachable pasts. Some of them did Really Bad Things. But the majority of the characters deserve at least, some measure of happiness. We are talking about Hurley, for example. If that dude, doesn’t get a happy ending, somehow, somewhere, we will be devastated.

Or Sun and Jin. Claire and Aaron. Locke. And Desmond. Speaking of which:

3 ) DESMOND

We would really like to know if Desmond is really as special as we think he is. All signs, in our opinion point to “Yes”. We have geeked out on a Grand Desmond Theory for years, ever since he first showed up in season 2. In season 5 he took a back seat (he hardly even showed up) that made us seriously doubt ourselves. And that cannot be. We are hoping he will come back with a bang in this last season and prove us right. Or the universe will collapse.

4) The End of the Quadrangle of DOOM once and for all.

The Love Quadrangle of Doom gave us stupid scenes like the one above. But we saw the end of it, when Sawyer found happiness with Juliet. They were cute together. They were in love. BUT at the end of season 5, Juliet fell to her death. That, coupled to the possible reset, prompted by the Hydrogen Bomb blowout may point out to a reset of the Quadrangle as well. We hope this is not the truth. (Although, deep in her heart of hearts, Ana still sort of hopes of a Sawyer-Kate ultimate hook-up) (And so does Thea. Even though she knows it’s not gonna happen).

5) Sawyer

He better have an heroic ending. No other character has had such an awesome arc as Sawyer. He went from a sleazy womaniser, self-absorbed con-man to a mature, responsible, leader that people could look up to. We would prefer he made it alive and well, but if he dies he better die a heroic death. No backtracking, please. We are just saying.

And one last thing: He Walks Amongst Us But Is Not One Of Us

(If you are sick and tired of us bitching and moaning about Jack, avert your eyes now!)

The ONE thing we are not prepared to see is for Jack to be the beginning and end of everything. If the Grand Unified Theory of Everything is …. Jack…..

…because he is the Incarnated Something from Somewhere (as his godforsaken tattoos from that scary Thai chick with the alien chest might signify) we actually think our collective brains will literally explode and our faith on TV shows will forever be tarnished by this blackness of profound lack of creativity. This can not happen. We don’t think we can ever recover after that.

And that is it! What about you, fellow Lost geeks? What do YOU want from the Final Season?

Last week we were left somewhat numbed and shocked by the unexpected news that Spider-Man 4 is no more, after both Sam Raimi and Tobey Maguire left the movie and that the franchise is going to be re-booted! *gasp* *shock* *hyperventilation*. Ok, so what that Spidey 3 sucked huge donkey balls? Tobey Maguire IS Spider Man/Peter Parker and we feel not a little bit sad that he will won’t be playing the superhero anymore.

SO, what better way to cheer ourselves up than to have a look at other Comic Book Superheroes/Heroes/Villains/Others that will be making their transition into the big screen this year?

Kick-Ass

Based on the comic book Kick-Ass by Mark Millar and John Romita, Jr about a teenage boy named Dave Lizewski (Aaron Johnson) who decides to become a (powerless) super-hero . The movie co-stars Nicholas Cage as a hilarious vigilante called Big Daddy and all trailers so far have been awesome. Premieres April 16th.

Jonah-Hex

Based on a DC Comics. Ok, so this one stars Josh Brolin and John Malkovich AND it is a Western about a horribly scarred, Civil War Veteran turned bounty hunter trying to stop an evil dude from raising an army of undead Confederates using voodoo. We are SO there. EVEN with Megan Fox as part of the cast. Premieres in June.

The Losers

Based on a Vertigo series which ran for 32 issues from 2003 to 2006, The Losers tells the story of a CIA Special Forces Team who were betrayed by their leader, left for dead and now set for revenge. The movie stars Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Chris Evans and Zoe Saldana. We are intrigued. Tentatively scheduled for June.

Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World

Based on the comic Scott Pilgrim it stars Michael Cera as a bass guitarrist who must fight the seven EVIL exes of his new girlfriend who is named, wait for it, Ramona Flowers. From the official website:

Scott Pilgrim has never had a problem getting a girlfriend. It’s getting rid of them that proves difficult. From the girl who kicked his heart’s ass — and now is back in town — to the teenage distraction he’s trying to shake when Ramona rollerblades into his world, love hasn’t been easy. He soon discovers, however, his new crush has the most unusual baggage of all: a nefarious league of exes control her love life and will do whatever it takes to eliminate him as a suitor.

As Scott gets closer to Ramona, he must face an increasingly vicious rogues’ gallery from her past, from infamous skateboarders to vegan rock stars and fearsomely identical twins. And if he hopes to win his true love, he must vanquish them all before it really is game over.

And finally, not really a newbie, but we had to include it:

Iron Man 2

We both loved the first movie and can’t wait for this sophomore effort. Not only does Robert Downey, Jr returns as Tony Stark but Don Cheadle plays what appears to be an awesome War Machine as teased in the trailer:

And hey Michey Roarke as Whiplash doesn’t look too shabby either!

May 2010 can not come soon enough!

This Saturday, and every Saturday for the duration of the TV season, we bring you On The Boob Tube with The Book Smugglers:

in which we talk about all those water cooler moments of the past week’s episodes, raving about the good, ranting about the bad.

Ana’s Favorites:

Dexter

Meh, this week didn’t do much for me. I was expecting a lot more after Dexter killed an innocent man last week. Even though the episode did deal with it, a la Dexter (by examining and comparing) , I still felt underwhelmed. I was surprised that Trinity tried to kill himself and the whole euphony he went through was WEIRD. And what about Deb’s find that Lundy’s killer can not be Trinity? WTF? Who was it then? Do we have a suspect? I have to admit, the first person I thought was the skanky journalist but I have no motive. And Rita. Rita, Rita, Rita do NOT DARE cheat on Dexter.

Castle

Another great, amusing episode. I liked this week’s case even though I guessed the killer from the start, but it was great seeing Castle being led by his nose in this one. I still can’t suspend my disbelief though with the NYPD walking around and including him in all of their interrogations and investigations. And can I ask a question? When does exactly he actually you know…WRITE?

Modern Family

OMG , I finally watched the first episode of Modern Family and I can’t believe how hilarious it was! How come I did not know that Al Bundy was in it. And Phil! – could that be? No, it can not be! But maybe? Surely not? The new Michael Scott? Cause all of his scenes were definitely cringe worthy. loved it and am adding it to the must-watch list!

Supernatural

Dudes. I am watching it but I am saving the snark-fest for this year’s Smugglivus’ Airing of Grievances.

V

LOVED the episode. Especially because there is now a Most Hawt Mysterious character for me to crush on! The infiltrated doctor, I am betting he is this John May! The twist with him killing the FBI guy and then blondie being Anna’s daughther was cool too. I am really digging this show.

House

I thought the whole episode was STUPID. House is back to manipulating people in the worst of ways. the whole thing with Thirteen (GOD I hate that woman) and Taub was ridiculous. I can’t believe Cameron left so easily and I can’t believe Chase didn’t leave with her! Come on! He was never THAT into the team anyways, now he wants to stay and the woman he loved for ages is finally THERE for him? COME ON. Gaah. Yeah, Cameron’s final speech was touching but too little too late in my opinion.

The Office:

One word: Re-Cyclops.

Thea’s Favorites:

Dexter

It’s really coming down to the wire now – you can feel the end of the season RAPIDLY approaching. Sob. I am going to miss you Dexter.

Well, this week was solid once again, although I’m more than a little annoyed with the implication that Rita’s going to sleep around on Dexter (next door neighbor douche – to quote Dex, “Do I see sheets of plastic in your future?”), and that someone other than Trinity shot Lundy and Deb. My money right now is on Quinn’s reporter girlfriend (aka Ms. No Top). Although I’m more than a little pissed that yet again, there’s another Batshit!Crazy! girlfriend on the show. Can we get some originality here? A non-clingy/bitchy/insane female character please? No? (on the flip side, someone about Deb’s height with motive for murder – it COULD be Dexter himself. He could be snapping – his murder of an innocent man last week proves this. Wouldn’t that be a helluva twist!?)

Quinn is also starting to remind me of Doakes in more than one way…I don’t really like the guy that much. I don’t know how much longer he may be with us…

House

GAAAAAAAAAAH. Thirteen is back. Whoopdeefuckingdoo. I think Jennifer Morrison leaving the show wasn’t really handled that well – they could have milked it a bit longer. As is, Cameron’s reasons for leaving the hospital (and the show) seem a little thin. I would have loved it if she had to grapple with Chase’s decision to kill the dictator, which didn’t affect her nearly so much as Chase being manipulated by House. Her final speech to House, admitting why she loved both him and Chase was touching, I’ll admit. I’ll really miss Cameron. She was a great character, a great moral center for the show. Sigh.

Castle

Not much to say, except, hee! I love Castle. His relationship with Alexis is so wonderful. I loved how worried he was that she was hiding something from him, and when it turns out she decides not to go overseas (at least for now), it’s sweet. Awwwww. That is all.

V

The plot thickens!!!! I *loved* the end, where Lisa (the cute blonde V) is Anna’s daughter! I am so looking forward to an Anna versus Erica showdown. I love how feisty Elizabeth Mitchell is, and I am definitely developing a soft spot for her and the priest. Now what exactly is “The Fifth Column” and who the hell is John May as their leader? I’m definitely getting LOST vibes from the show (hello, Jacob), but in a good way. I’m loving this.

Modern Family

How much do I love this show? It’s easily the funniest new show of the season, and it’s got so much potential. This week, the lovely, HILARIOUS Elizabeth Banks makes a cameo, as does Edward Freaking Norton! Talk about some solid actors! Elizabeth Banks as drunky McFun girl (who resents Lily for stealing her two gay best party buds) and Ed Norton as british bass player from the ’80s absolutely rock.

Glee

This episode was SO CRINGEWORTHY. Every other scene I would be ducking my head, embarrassed for each of the characters. Hilarious yes, but cringeworthy. Kurt and his plan to get Finn to quit girls entirely and sob into his shoulderpads – brilliant. Rachel’s inappropriate school girl crush on Will – awkwardly wonderful. SUSIE PEPPER! Effing awesome – she’s all Molly Shannon circa Superstar. With peppers. Also, mixed in with the cringeworthy hilarity, there’s a lot of heart too – Quinn being kicked out by her family was really sad stuff. I hate what she’s doing to both Puck and Finn (come on, Finn deserves to know the truth even though he’ll most likely still stay with her), but I feel sorry for her too. Looks like the cat’s out of the bag though – I’m pretty sure the baby daddy news will get back to Finn soon enough.

Community

Another really solid episode! Loved Jeff sucking up to Senor Chang (aka El Tigre), especially LOVED the An American Tail drops throughout. Somewhere, out there…beneath the *pale* moonlight….

The Office

HAHAHAHAHA! The shareholder meeting didn’t go so well. I love the timely message, and how Oscar chickens out when it comes time to speak to the executive board. Also, Recyclops? WIN.

It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia

The D.E.N.N.I.S. system. *facepalm* It seems like a lot of work just to get a good bang in, but whatever works I suppose! It’s such an evil, exploitative system….and it’s hilarious in how well the whole thing works. Also, Sweet Dee and her marine were pretty damn funny here too. Man, I love these assholes.

And that’s it from us! What about you? Any TV moments you care to share?

This Saturday, and every Saturday for the duration of the TV season, we bring you On The Boob Tube with The Book Smugglers:

in which we talk about all those water cooler moments of the past week’s episodes, raving about the good, ranting about the bad.

For the Week of November 7 to November 13

Ana’s Favourites

Mad Men

This season final was very good and wrapped up the season beautifully. Starting with what I expected would happen: that Don WOULD leave Sterling Cooper to start a new agency. What I did not see coming was Sterling and Cooper themselves joining him. It was great fun though to see their antics, their attempts to co-opt other people and to steal stationary stuff from the office! And I loved that they brought Peggy, Peter and Joan along too!

Now, on the Private Life of Din and Betty Draper: OMG can that woman be any more stupid??? I was ultra happy that she decided to go be happy with the dude and ask Don for divorce BUY BETTY HOW DO YOU LEAVE A HUSBAND ANT TAKE YOUR KIDS INTO A NEW MARRIAGE AND DOESN’T EVEN ASK FOR MONEY FOR YOUR OWN SECURITY? Because WOMAN! What if things don’t work out with the new guy? You barely know him! What will you do, moneyless? Will you go back to Don and ask for help? And you know what? I am pretty sure the guy will turn out to be a bully!

Now, we wait and see.

Dexter

What is up with Trinity??? He freaked me out this episode. The whole scene at the woods, was just….I don’t know. Does he suspect Dexter or is he going into another cycle….but so soon? Is he “broken”??? why? So many questions!

And Dexter! OMG he killed an innocent man, thus breaking his code. What will happen next? Will he realise that he is a true sociopath and perhaps not feel anything about it? Or is this “external” code stronger than his internal wiring? How will he deal with that – I think that this killing will mean a lot to the show, perhaps we are witnessing the beginning of the end : it is easier to forget and forgive him when he is killing other serial killers. But an innocent man? Not so much.

And poor Batista and Laguerta!!!

Castle

How do I adore this show? Not only the weekly mysteries are interesting/keep me guessing, I SO adore Castle. And Castle and his mom. And Castle and his cute daughter . oh and Castle and Beckett – oh the chemistry. It slays me. I am loving it!

House

Yay, House is back after a break! Once again, the relationship between House and Wilson proves to be the best one on this show – loved their interaction but there is no surprise here. THERE IS a surprise in finding out that Cuddy is all. …cuddly with the PI dude! wtf????????? And the ending when Chase tells Cameron about the dude he killed? I am worried. Can’t wait to see her reaction.

V

Didn’t think this one lived up to the pilot but thought it was pretty cool. From the opening sequence I just KNEW that the V!FBI dude would so come back. And I love the telltale sign of a V – the blinking eyes. I am pretty sure this will come into play bit time. I am not sure I like Erica’s son though – he is annoying me. A LOT. But I am still surprised that Scott Wolf doesn’t.

And who is already shipping Erica and the priest? *raises hand* (and yes. I know it’s wrong)

Glee

This episode was amazing. I cried I laughed, I CARED. Starting with the Artie storyline and the whole thing with the wheels. His solo of Dancing With Myself (my favourite Billy Idol song!) was awesome. Then Quinn being a complete bitch with poor Finn and Puck – so unfair – why does she think she can get away with it? Then, there is Sue and the most surprising info about her life and finally, Kurt and his dad. I LOVE his father, he is awesome. Their scenes were incredible. Loved this episode.

The Office

There is a reason why The Office is one of the best sitcoms ever and this episode was a brilliant example: the complete crazyness that this office is coupled with Michael being LAME yet LOVEABLE. I mean, how wrong is it in the face of possible ruin, he decides the answer is to play Murder? And yet, it turned out to be the right thing to do! Them everybody getting to play southern accents? Oscar’s was so funny! and OMG Creed thinking that it was for reals and then leaving the office and then finally, the stand -off of “double agents” Michael, Dwight, Andy and…..Pam! LOLOLOL. I was in stitches.

Thea’s Favorites

Dexter

Another crazy week on Dexter – I’m with Ana. I think Trinity is on Dexter’s game. Clearly, his ritual isn’t quite done yet, I think there’s one final murder that Lundy never was wise to…hence the crazy coffin. (On a funny note, last week in the comments Kristen said that Trinity’s a nice guy as long as you leave his ashes alone – and this week we can add “and as long as you don’t interrupt him while he’s sanding down his COFFIN” to the list)

And holy smokes, Dexter killed an innocent man. This is HUGE. This could be bad. That’s a line that Dexter cannot EVER afford to cross…I wonder how this will play out. Nail biting will ensue.

House

Yay, it’s back! Except…things are looking increasingly grim for the gang. Someone leaked that Jennifer Morrison will be leaving the show this season (I saw it on the TV Guide cover while waiting in line at the supermarket)…so, methinks Chase’s news is NOT going to go over well. (GODDAMMIT this means fucking Thirteen is back dammitDammitDAMMIT). Also, how adorable are House and Cuddy?

Castle

What Ana said – Castle is so much fun. This week’s episode was more of the same awesomeness – I love Castle’s quippy asides. And how does Beckett NOT know about the movie Quicksilver with Kevin Bacon and Paul Rodriguez?

V

Hell fucking yes, show 2 was pretty solid. V has promise, and I’m jumping on this train. Alan Tudyk is ALIVE! Aaaaa! I agree that Tyler is annoying, but I can understand why he’s such a lying jerk to his mom (I mean, he is a rebellious teenager). Once again, Elizabeth Mitchell is made of awesome, and holy crap Tori from BSG was in this episode! I automatically assume she’s a V too – Cylon, V, she’s never EVER to be trusted.

Glee

Yay, Glee’s back too! And this was a surprisingly touching episode – not only because of Wheels and how his teammates finally understand what he’s going through, but because of Sue’s hidden past, and because of Tina’s stutter story. AND ohmygod, Kurt and Rachel’s duet of Defying Gravity was….goosebump inducing.

AND while we’re on Glee – did you know that the kid that plays Wheels actually was in a bonafide boy band before the show? I looked him up and couldn’t stop laughing. Just watch the video HERE. He’s the first one singing. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Community

Another solid episode! I loved Abed’s future prediction powers – is a werewolf REALLY coming to campus? Oh god I hope so.

The Office

“Well I do decla-ah!” Bwahahahaha! Another solid episode, and I want this murder mystery game. It looks fun. And holy crapoly, Erin and Andy! *facepalm* They are adorable. And oh my god, Oscar’s accent was the WORST I have ever heard. EVER. Amazing.

It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia

Mac and Dennis really are a codependent couple, and their breakup was pretty funny stuff. But one of my favorite pairings is when Dee and Charlie hook up, and the cat-in-the-walls thing was again, hilarious.

AND that’s it from us this week! What have you been watching?

This Saturday, and every Saturday for the duration of the TV season, we bring you On The Boob Tube with The Book Smugglers:

in which we talk about all those water cooler moments of the past week’s episodes, raving about the good, ranting about the bad.

For the Week of November 1 to November 6

Ana’s Favourites

Mad Men

The last two episodes were everything I have been hoping for with regards to Don facing both his past and his present mistakes. Betty finally confronts him about what she found and he breaks down and tells her everything. It was a very good scene where I realised, not for the first time how good an actor he is. I was kinda sad for him at the same time that I was totally and completely HAPPY that he was getting what he deserves and that came in this week’s episode – when Betty tells him that she does not love him anymore. Awesome.

When this season first started and I learnt it was 1963, I knew that the JFK’s assassination would have to come into play at some point, and I was not disappointed. It was well expected to see how it touched all the characters and there was one scene in particular that left me really surprised only because I was not aware of the fact that Lee Oswald was shot , live on TV! Betty screaming at the TV was…whoa, man.

Next week, is the final episode of the season and I really want to see how all storylines will come together. Here is hoping that part of the team will leave Sterling Cooper for their own agency – that would be all kinds of awesome.

Dexter

Oh my word! Hhow freaky and yet totally cool is John Lithgow playing serial killer Trinity? One moment I think he is totally scary , the next he is as cuddly as a teddy bear. The moment that Dexter and us , viewers realise that Trinity leads a regular life with family, kids and he is a deacon at church was quite possibly one of the most memorable scenes in Dexter, ever. Then, of course, there is the hope that Dex feels that he too, can have it all, which is the theme of this season. And this is proven by how over and over again he gets away with things. Rita on the other hand is annoying me so.freaking.much.

But seriously, how awesome is Deb this season? I don’t think I ever liked her this much. The scene at the parking lot where she breaks down after Lundy’s murder was so raw and so sad. I honestly cried a lot in that scene. I am also really, really enjoying how Quinn is helping her and I yes, I am rooting for a future hook-up. What can I say? It is the shipper in me!

Castle

One word for you: Browncoat. The Halloween episode was all kinds of cool with Nathan Fillion donning his Firefly costume again and I was totally geeking out at it. Other than that, the show is so very pleasant – yes each week’s case is your usual police procedural but they manage to make it interesting; and of course the
chemistry between Castle and Becket is another one that pleases the shipper in me!

V

DUDES! THE PILOT WAS AWESOME! I loved every second of it, the acting, the special effects, the tension, the divided loyalties. I even liked Scott Wolf! V has so much potential. I won’t say anything else as we plan to write a post about it after the second episode (just in case this one was a fluke) because that’s how much we both loved it. After FlashforwardFail, this has restored my faith in this new season!

Thea’s Favorites – I’ve got two weeks to catch up on, so here goes…

Dexter

Deb’s heartbreaking loss and her scene was just…wow. I agree with Ana – Jennifer Carpenter is really awesome this season, and I think she deserves an award nod. That parking lot scene…just WOW. That said, I’m fed up with Quinn and I love how his journalist girlfriend is TOPLESS IN EVERY SCENE. How do you cast that? “Looking for hot chick who will be topless in every scene – prudes need not apply!” Heh. To be fair, she has some nice knockers.

John Lithgow and the revelation that he’s JUST.LIKE.DEXTER is awesome. He’s terrifying, and I’m enjoying learning more about what makes Trinity tick – why he kills. The scene with his wife in the bathtub….eeeeew! Creepy! I like that Dexter is trying to pick up tips from him, as wrong as it is. And is it wrong that I hate Darla – I mean Rita – so much? She’s getting annoying…but then I stop and think about it, and she’s just (finally) picking up on the fact that Dexter is not the standup guy he pretends to be. I wonder if she’ll ever learn about Dex’s “Dark Passenger”? Will she accept him? Interesting…

V

Holy smokes, I LOVED THIS PILOT! It had everything I could have wanted – great acting, solid plot setup, awesome special effects, promise for a season full of goodness. Why didn’t ABC pick this as their “LOST replacement” show? It’s certainly lightyears better than that gawdawful mess that is Flashforward! Also I should note that I haven’t seen the ’80s show, so I have no frame of reference for the pilot. But what I’ve seen, I’ve really, really liked. A list of the coolness that is the new V:

• Morena Baccarine (aka Inara) as “Anna” – she’s terrifying and so fitting. I’m not a huge fan of the hair, but it suits the character perfectly. She looks alien. And I love how she does that weird blinking thing that makes her look like a reptile in human skin.
• The fact that V pokes fun at its own recycled source material – “It’s like Independence Day –” “Which was a ripoff of any number of science fiction predecessors!” Yeeaaaaaah SF geeks, FTW!
• Seeing Morena Baccarine and Alan Tudyk in the same show again! Awwww. Even though they are completely different characters.



• My sweet, sweet Elizabeth “Juliet” Mitchell. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this before, but I have the HUGEST girl-crush on the lovely Elizabeth Mitchell – probably the biggest girl crush I’ve had since I fell in love with Dana Scully back in fifth grade. Her role here as Erica is smart, beautiful and – naturally – badass as a mom and an FBI agent. Me likey.
• The special effects – the CG was amazingly solid. Color me impressed!



• Scott Wolf doesn’t even bother me – and is it just me, or does he look more and more like Michael J. Fox as he gets older? Also, I love that his name is “Chad Decker.” That’s almost as cool as “Cole Trickle.”
• The awesome plotseed of Erica and her teenage son, the tension that is building as he’s falling under the V’s spell



• The underlying theme that the Vs are responsible for our world turmoil; the idea that there are V sleeper cells; the reptile skin under the human flesh



• Morris Chestnut – I love him as an actor, and I love that he’s going more mainstream in this tv show. AND I love the twist that he’s a V with a conscience! Oooo, how exciting!

Modern Family

This is probably the funniest show to premiere this season. I LOVED the race between the Happy Gilmore chick and Steve from Dawn of the Dead last week, and this week’s fencing match was hilarious. Manny really tore that little asian girl apart *facepalm*

Community

The Halloween episode was HILARIOUS. I think it’s the first time I’ve really laughed my ass off while watching this show! Pierce’s tripping out, his desk fort…and Abed’s ridiculously spot on Bale-Batman voice. I loved it. LOVED IT. This week’s episode isn’t nearly as winning, but still fun.

The Office

Three words: Male Prima Donna.

The music video rules (as does the Subtle Sexuality website). I love Erin sooooo much. Also, this week’s episode with Michael dumping Pam’s mom on her b-day, and then Pam’s slap….just, wow. Awesome.

It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia

KITTEN MITTENS! FINALLY! I have been laughing my ass off at these Charlie promos since they first aired, and finally, the Kitten Mittens episode is in the flesh. I mean, just look:

And I love any time that Charlie gets to use his Lawyerman Persona. He says the most random, ridiculous shit, and it’s amazing.

Also, last week’s episode with “Desert Rose,” the poking fun at Mickey Rourke’s The Wrestler, and OF COURSE, The Birds of War song…I have no words. Just watch.

AND that’s it from us this week! What have you been watching?

Disclaimer: Halloween is totally a Thea thing when she hijacks the blog and makes me watch and read all sorts of stuff that are way outside my comfort zone (I am SO NOT a horror/Halloween fan). Last year, it was The Evil Dead movies, which, wouldn’t you know, I ended up loving. This year, I was given another list of movies that I had to watch, one for ach day of the week. Ana’s Halloween Marathon is now an official part of our annual Halloween celebration. Let the torture fun begins! Also: there will be spoilers!

Ana’s Halloween TV/Movie Marathon: Day 3 – Alien/Aliens

Why These movies: Today is Sci-fi Horror day in our Halloween Week special and when Thea found out that I had never watched any of the Alien movies franchise, she added it to my Halloween Marathon list.

Trivia: I consider myself a movie buff. At the age of 12 when my parents first bought a VCR, I discovered this world of movies available to me at the video store. I went completely mental and started to rent all sorts of movies but gravitated towards old black and white Hollywood movies, the Epics, the French, comedies and dramas and completely avoided Horror and Scifi (unless there is “Star” in its title). To this date, I have yet to watch Blade Runner, something that I need to remedy and soon.

The Viewing Party:

I honestly can’t believe it took me this long to watch these movies. I know how important they are (Alien is in the AFI top 100 best science fiction movies) and how much they figure in the cultural background of our times: there are toys, games, video games, novels and several movies. Every time there is a television especial about “best movie moments”, “best 80s movies” and “best movie hero/heroine”, it is a sure thing that at least one of the Alien movies will figure in that. Heck, even though I never watched the movies before now, I knew quite a lot about them from hearsay and from those specials. I knew who Ripley is, what the Alien looks like and what is a “John Hurt Moment”. I also knew how much Thea loves them.

So, under the weight of those heavy expectations I bought the first two movies and started to watch them. And I can honestly say that I totally get it how this has such a lasting effect. I will not do my usual viewing marathon thing in which I write as I go along, mostly because I tried to do that and the notes I have consist of:

“aaaaaaaaaa”
“oh noes”
“no, John Hurt, don’t do that”
“listen to Ripley”
“listen to Ripley”
“OMG Ash NEEDS TO DIE”
“what a moron”
“no, you idiot”
“OMG!!!!!”
“gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah”
“Listen to Ripley you idiots!”
“I love Ripley!”
“Ripley forever!!!”

And

“I can’t believe it!”

And also

“Ripley rules!”

Not very helpful. So instead, I will just list the reasons why I loved the movies.

1) The special effects.

Colour me completely surprised. Since the first movie is from 1979 and the second one from1986, I was expecting them to be dated and well, lame. No such thing. I actually turned to Dear Partner and said: sometimes, I hate GCI. Why can’t more movies be like these ones? The spaceships look real enough, I love all light effects (like inside the computer room).and above all the creature, Alien itself is a thing of beauty: the epitome of what “alien” truly means ie “different”.

2) The story and how it unfolds.

From the opening sequence of Alien when the commercial spaceship’s lights turn on, the crew awakening to find out that they are not on their way home as they expected and instead are responding to a (presumed) SOS signal. It is a slow set-up in which things fall into place little by little. There is the requisite look at the daily life of the crew, the introduction to the characters (and a chance to see who is the one with the Level-head, the one that is careless, the one that is a moron, the one that is a hero and so on and so forth) and to the spaceship layout (one word: BIG. In other words: a lot of room for an Alien to HIDE); I just loved this slow progress into the story and its sense of impending doom. Like, when John Hurt slips when he is investigating the eggs inside the derelict alien ship they found and then decides it is a clever thing to poke the eggs. OF COURSE, something bad happens there. But never mind, because Ripley, the main character played by the awesome Sigourney Weaver KNOWS that they should put John Hurt in quarantine but do they listen to her? NOOOO.

Of course, things escalate to a point of no return as the tension and the horror build up and build up as the ONE Alien wipes out every single character. I guess it should come as no surprise that only one person survives. It did astonish me though and it was a HUGE A-ha! Moment when I realised that everything was on purpose: the trip, the capturing of the Alien and that Ash, aka the character I hated the most was actually an android. This is brilliant storytelling right there.

And then Aliens, beings and it is even more dramatic. I did not expect to find out that Ripley had been sleeping for 57 years and woke up to the fact that her daughter died a mere two years before. The drama, even though this is a sci-fi horror , it is very , very human. As human as it can, as Ripley suffers from horrible nightmares and decides to confront her fears by going back to that godforsaken planet. There, she finds a lost girl, the only survivors of a colony that is being used as incubators for the horrible Aliens and in the girl, Newt, the possibility of being there for her when she could not be there for her own daughter. The maternal instinct is I think, what drives both Ripley and the Queen Alien and the showdown between the two of them in the end, both female , both kick ass, is the stuff that great movies are made of.

3) The fact that we, as a race, are utter morons

I keep saying this to Thea but it bears repeating. Most Horror movies would not be possible if it wasn’t for the idiot character that pissed off the alien/ghost/demon or awaken the Evil Force or went traipsing in the abandoned/derelict/isolated building/house/cemetery/wood.

In both Alien and Aliens s a lot of things could have been avoided if people would only listen to Ripley, aka the Voice of Reason. If protocol had been followed, if precautions have been taken. In Aliens it is even worse as these people set out to a possibly alien-infested world with only a handful of marines and a limited amount of ammunition. Come on now.

The fact that these two movies manage to engage despite these obvious contrivances (especially in movie two. Movie one has a perfectly reasonable excuse in the A-HA moment)

4) The horror!

Oh yes. How positively horrific these movies are. Of the pulsating, increasingly gross variety, the kind that grabs one by the throat as one watches one by one, the characters being taken, chased like rabbits by a violent, horrible, threatening, motherfreaking ugly, nearly indestructible, unstoppable predator.

But the scenes that are the most horrific to me, were these ones: when we still didn’t know what the frak was happening, what the creatures were: this one at the beginning of Alien when John Hurt’s helmet was removed to reveal this the Facehugger:

And then the infamous John Hurt Moment , when the Chestburster er, burst out of his chest:

I think though that above all, the most terrifying thing that happened in the movie did not happen because of the Alien. It came with the utterly frustrating and outrageous realisation that this is all because some ambitious plan from a faceless The Company. It came when Ripley read that computer message that says that all crew was expendable, as long as one of the creatures was taken alive. Oh, the humanity.

5) Ripley

Dudes, words can not describe how much I love this character. How much I love that she, SHE alone saves herself and in Aliens saves three other people (ok two people and a robot) AND kills the Queen Alien. How ,in the face of adversity, she keeps her cool, how she is capable of making all the hard decisions when the other moronic male characters are frozen by their fear. She’s got pretty cool lines and pretty cool weapons. Plus the awesome kick-assness that makes her being the one carrying people to their safety, going back to save the child when there is almost no chance of survival because it is the right thing to do. This is a character that deserves respect and admiration and she gets both from me.

Get away from her, you bitch!

These are my reasons for loving Alien and Aliens – what about you? Like? Dislike?

Disclaimer: Halloween is totally a Thea thing when she hijacks the blog and makes me watch and read all sorts of stuff that are way outside my comfort zone (I am SO NOT a horror/Halloween fan). Last year, it was The Evil Dead movies, which, wouldn’t you know, I ended up loving. This year, I was given another list of movies that I had to watch, one for ach day of the week. Ana’s Halloween Marathon is now an official part of our annual Halloween celebration. Let the torture fun begins! Also: there will be spoilers!

Ana’s Halloween TV/Movie Marathon: Day 2 – Land of the Dead / Dawn of the Dead 2004

Why These movies: Thea is a major zombie fan and has managed to infect me with a certain enthusiasm for the critters. During our Zombie Appreciation Week earlier this year, I watched zombie movies: Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead and Night of the Living Dead – the Remake and I loved them. Especially the first one. Now, for our Halloween Week II, we decided I should watch 2 more zombie movies…

The viewing Party: This time I am psychologically prepared for the Zombie marathon. I also have zero comestibles (I learnt the hard way not to eat whilst watching zombie movies. Don’t ask) but I do have some beer. I start in chronological order, with Romero’s Land of the Dead.

It has been a while since the zombie-apocalypse , the world is infested with them and humans seem to have settled in the new world order. At least they seem better equipped to fight back. There are teams that use fireworks to distract the zombies whilst they go around scavenging for supplies. One leader is Riley (It’s Simon Baker, The Mentalist! Oh hello baby!) and he seems to have a beef with another team leader, Cholo (John Leguizamo). Devastation is everywhere – towns are empty of humans, taken over by zombies. Oh.

Oh. OOOOOOOOOOOOH. These zombies. They are different. They seem to TRY, purposely TRY to be human? Are they trying to communicate? Wait a minute. There is this big black zombie person….he finds a gun and he picks it up! Oh this does not bode well.

Meanwhile, the American Dream lives on in Fiddler’s Green where the rich and powerful have found heaven on earth whilst the rest of the populace lives on quite poorly. I am not quite sure where this is (I googled. It is Pittsburgh) but the city is well protected – bordered by a river on three of its side and by a fence that keeps away the zombies. The camera goes around and we see that humans are using the zombies for fun: there is some sort of amusement park where they can shoot the zombies, or they have zombie cage fights. In one of these cage fights, Simon Baker’s Love Interest is trapped with two zombies and he saves her. But Oh, the humanity. The poor , poor zombies. THEY ARE PEOPLE TOO.

Oh-oh. Big Daddy zombie , he is intelligent. He is like a leader and he is taking the zombies towards the city! I swear it is like watching The Evolution of the Zombie, live. They use tools now , you know?
Meanwhile Simon Baker is out to get John Leguizamo who has gone rogue. By the way, just how old is John Leguizamo?

I have been watching movies with the dude for aaaaaaaaaaaaaages and he looks exactly the same! *googles* He was like 40 when he did this movie. Doesn’t look like it. Anyways, I digress.
There is a horrible sense of desolation in this movie when Simon Baker and his Love Interest go outside the city to find Cholo who decides to run and DOOM! He is bitten! I am not sure what to think as he is not the bestest of people ever but he is also not That Bad.

And then, what an amazing scene: the zombies are crossing the river!

And they invade the city and it is Fiesta de Human Beings. Later Zombie!Cholo! has a face –off with Corporate dude who created Fiddler’s Green and who was trying to flee as the city is overtaken by zombies.
It ends with the zombies leaving……and Simon Baker not killing them and saying: “they are looking for a place to go…same as us. ”

Awesome.

Verdict: Well this movie is quite interesting. Once more I am faced with the fact that I actually don’t fear the zombies as much as I fear the freaking, stupid human beings who are capable of despicable acts. I liked the evolution of the zombie – maybe something between human and something else new? I wonder where else could this be leading to. I didn’t think this one was a gruesome as it could have been which I think I am grateful for. Kudos, Mr Romero.

Next!

Dawn of the Dead is a remake. Of .. Dawn of the Dead. The one where a group of humans barricade themselves inside a shipping mall after the zombie apocalypse starts.It was my least favorite of the previous marathon, but one I still liked. It was the lightest of them all, I think, with a lot of humorous parts. The remake is by Zach Snyder, the guy behind 300 and Watchmen. And I can tell straight away. The opening credits are awesome and remind me a lot of that of Watchmen.

But I am ahead of myself because the opening credits are like ten minutes into the movie, ten minutes that were positively brilliant yet….WRONG, in so many levels.

It begins with a nurse Ana, going back home at the end of her shift, going to bed with her husband, only to wake up to find a zombie girl inside her room. The zombie kills the husband , who immediately becomes a zombie and pursues her. Like….he runs. Really , really fast.

I pause. Wait a minute. These zombies are different! Even more different than the ones from Land of the Dead. They are stronger and faster! Noooooooooooooooo nonononononono. NO. This is wrong. I email Thea to rant. Because wouldn’t you know…it turns out, I am not only a new zombie lover, I also seem to a zombie purist. Zombies are slow, Zach Snyder, SLOW. I am quite incensed by these wanna-be zombies. I am also, quite terrified because, there is no way, NO WAY, we (as in human beings, we) can survive a zombie apocalypse with THESE zombies. NO WAY.

Zombies. RUNNING. The Nerve.

Anyways, I resume watching. Ana, who by the way, doesn’t seem t be grieving her recently deceased husband, runs away and joins a group of people who decide to hide in the mall. Inside there are three security guards who run the show and give them refuge.

There are QUITE a few people here. Including a petty criminal and his VERY pregnant wife and a guy who lives in another building across the parking lot. Then, MORE people arrive in a truck and all of a sudden, there are more characters than I can count or care about. Just to prove my point this one guy is infected and they have to kill him and do I care? NO. There was not enough time for me to care. Instead of the small group of characters like in the previous movies, where we get to learn about them as they live through months inside the mall. Me no likey. Plus hello Ana and this other dude, whom I really like by the way, start to develop a romance….but didn’t her husband just die????

There is this one scene where they are in the roof and there are loads, shit loads of zombies coming to the mall and they are all like, why? Why are they coming here? One of the characters say: “Memory , instinct, coming for us”. Nothing else. He doesn’t say the most important thing! Memory and instinct of WHAT. And with this just like that, they completely fuck this up because this scene should have had social criticism! NO. I don’t like the mindless, zombie for entertainment movie. I don’t like gore and blood for gore and blood. I want something else.

Then, the pregnant lady goes into labour and she has been bitten but her husband has gone mucho loco and keeps her alive and the baby is born and it is a Zombie!Baby! ewww gross! Scary! Wrong! The guy is a total psycho yo! He and the baby are killed, praise the lord. And the others decide to leave the mall and go to a marina and take a boat and honestly? Blah. I lost interest! I mean, the ending has some thrilling sequences with the Super!Fast!Zombies! Then some sacrifices are made and the remaining dudes including Ana (I like Ana, she is kick ass, maybe it’s the name?) …

….sail away only to find themselves in a zombie-infested island with no chance of survival. How could they really? The End. Really.

Verdict: No, I am not a fan of this one. I mean, I am sure there is fun to be had somewhere, the opening was cool, the ending too but it lacked something else. Maybe the humor of the original, definitely the Something More that Romero infused his zombie movies with. Not once did I want to kill the humans because they were stupid, mostly because they were boring. I also admit that these zombies scared the shit out of me. *shudders*

What about you? What do you think of Zombies? Do you like The Traditional Zombie or the New!Fast!Improved ones?