So, for our last day of Halloween Week, we decided to save the most popular horror invocation–The Slasher.

When you ask someone about a Halloween horror movie, chances are high that you’ll get a Jason Voorhees, Mike Myers, or Freddy Krueger mention in there. And why not? The slasher is an integral part of the genre–though, as I hope we’ve made a case for over the week, it’s not the only form.

Here’s a list of my favorite slasher films, from Mario Bava to Alexandre Aja!

The Precursors:

Twitch of the Death Nerve

A Mario Bava film, which translates directly to intensely high body counts, crazy camera angles and lighting, and an all around fun time. Countess Federica owns a nice piece of property but is wheelchair-ridden. At the onset of the film she is strangled by her husband, who is then killed by someone else. In a struggle for her inheritance, thirteen other characters are killed one by one. This remains Bava’s most controversial film, for its brutality, it’s convoluted plot, and excessive gore. And…it’s one of the first real slasher-splatter films.

Black Christmas (1974)

Often cited as the first true Slasher film, Black Christmas is a treat. A sorority house is terrorized over Christmas break–someone keeps calling their phone, and moaning, breathing heavily into the mouthpiece. The mystery phone moaner, sneaks into the house by way of the attic, and stealithy strangles one of the girls. One by one, the killer picks off each of the girls, also continuing to call the house. Black Christmas also marks the first traced-call-coming-from-upstairs movie/urban legend. Make sure to watch the original and not the recent (complete crap) remake.

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre

Leatherface has become a household name due to the recent remake (listed further down on this list), but before Explosions!American Flags!Michael Bay, there was this cult classic–which surprisingly isn’t as gory as you’d expect. There’s actually little to no onscreen blood–the horror is generated by the wonderful directing skills of Tobe Hooper, from the sound of the chainsaw, the implied violence, and the mounting tension. A classic horror film–truly one of the best independent horror films ever made. Certainly one of the most iconic. Which brings me to…

The Golden Age:

Halloween

As with the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Halloween was an independent film, made on a small budget by a clever director that relied more on simmering terror over copious amounts of gore (like Chainsaw Massacre, Halloween is actually not gory or bloody). In many ways, Michael Myers in his white mask is the father, the harbinger, of the modern slasher film genre, for better or for worse. The film opens with one of my favorite ever horror sequences–the camera is in the first person, from behind a mask looking through the eyeholes, as an unknown character goes into a girl’s room. We see that she knows the masked figure; it is her brother, named Michael. And then, Michael stabs sister Laurie to death with a carving knife, and walks downstairs and outside. Two parents are coming up the front stairs–at this point, one parent unmasks the killer, and the camera angle shifts. We see that Michael is a boy of only six years old…

And that’s just the opening sequence. This movie is still one of my ultimate favorites, and probably my favorite straight slasher film–it is a defining horror movie in every way, from the brilliant directing, Jamie Lee Curtis’ acting, the CLASSIC score, and good god is it just scary. Closet wire hanger scene, anyone?! The franchise would continue, growing from this huge success (although only Halloween II and III are associated with Carpenter–and III is not even about Mike Myers, it’s about killer masks, and one of my favorites!).

Friday the 13th

Ki-ki-ki-ki-ki….ma-ma-ma-ma-ma…. (<---That was my lame impression of the Jason music). Jason Voorhees. Camp Crystal Lake. Need I say more? Jason stormed on the scene in 1980 as an unabashed attempt to cash in on the Mike Meyers market--which it did. The first movie is actually significantly different from the later films, in that the killer isn't Jason (Jason had died at Camp Crystal Lake in the '50s, drowned as a consequence of two camp counselors having sex in the woods as opposed to watching the kids). Twenty-years later, the camp is reopening, and someone is picking off the counselors one by one. The franchise, cashing in on the huge success of the first movie, shifts to Jason's murderous rampages--and no longer confined only to camp Crystal Lake. (He goes to Manhattan, Hell, and outer space. Yup. And somehow...it's still fun, if ridiculous) Plus, a cool crossover with the next guy on this list...

A Nightmare on Elm Street

One, two Freddy’s coming for you
Three, four better lock your door
Five, six grab a crucifix
Seven, eight better stay up late
Nine, ten never sleep again…

Freddy Krueger is certainly an icon, and one of the most recognizable figures for horror–or cinema, for that matter (even moreso than Jason and Mike Myers!). Again, cashing in on Halloween’s success, A Nightmare on Elm Street examines the urban legend that if you die in your sleep, you die in real life–only the death is attributed to a blade fingered, burn scarred maniac, who hunts teens in their dreams. My personal favorites are the first and third films (the third, Dream Warriors probably being my ultimate favorite of the franchise). Bloody, surreal, and at least initially terrifying, A Nightmare on Elm Street remains THE iconic ’80s slasher.

Freddy vs. Jason

So, this should probably be filed under “guilty pleasures”, but whatever. What happens when you get two old great slasher icons together in one film? They get pissed off and try to kill each other! Personally, I was rooting for Freddy. Yeah, this movie is pure ridiculousness, but it’s AWESOME ridiculousness. (And yes, I’m one of those people that goes to the theater to watch AVP)

Child’s Play

One of the first horror movies I can remember watching at the ripe age of…oh, probably 6 or 7. Chucky is a Good Guy doll, the hottest toy to hit shelves that year, and Karen Barclay is determined to get one for her son Andy’s birthday. The doll she buys off the street, however, has been possessed by the late spirit of Lakeshore Strangler, Charles Lee Ray (by means of a voodoo ritual he performed shortly before his real body was killed by the police). This movie by all accounts shouldn’t be scary, but somehow, it is! Also, upon watching it as an adult, it’s clear that though scary, Chucky is at times hilarious (even before going the Bride of Chucky route)–i.e. in the elevator scene when Chucky is heading back up to the Barclay apartment, an elderly couple remarks “That’s a hideous doll!”. As the elevator rolls away when the couple gets off, you hear Chucky go “Fuck you lady…”. Aaaaa! I love it!

Prom Night/April Fool’s Day/Sleepaway Camp

So I had to throw in at least a few of the slashers spawned by Mike, Jason and Freddy. The ’80s truly were the golden age–there are many, many more films of this ilk, but here are my favorites of the rest. Prom Night, starring Jamie Lee Curtis, follows a group of teenagers that guard a terrible secret from when they were children, and on prom night, one by one they are murdered by a masked killer. April Fool’s Day, a horror comedy inspired by Agatha Christie’s And Then There Were None, follows a group of friends as they go on spring break to one friend, Muffy’s, mansion on an island. Muffy has prepared each room with different gag gifts and pranks, and has a very elaborate party set up for all of them…

Sleepaway Camp…well, there are no words. At first, it appears to be a Friday the 13th ripoff, as camp teens are murdered one by one. But believe me when I say, the twist ending is effing insane.

The Slasher Revival:

Scream

Wes Craven, creator of Freddy Krueger, brings back the slasher in 1996 with his horror-comedy Scream. Sidney Prescott is a damaged young thing, struggling on the anniversary of her mother’s raped and murder. Someone, clad in black, wearing a scream mask, is killing Sidney’s friends and trying to murder her as well. Scream is a delight, not just because of the tongue-in-cheek approach it takes to slasher films and the self-mocking it employs, but also because, underneath all the inside jokes and slasher cliches and references, it’s actually a damn good, scary movie!

I Know What You Did Last Summer

Following on the heels of Scream’s success, I Know What You Did Last Summer jumped in to cash on the revived genre. Loosely, loosely based on the young adult novel by Lois Duncan, IKWYDLS (I’m not typing out that title again) sensationalizes and amps up the blood and body count. A group of high school friends–a jock, a beauty queen, a studious brunette and the boy from the wrong side of the dock but with a golden heart–are celebrating their last summer together before going their separate ways. They get drunk, get into rich jock boy’s car, and end up hitting a boy on the dark road. Terrified, they toss the body and make a pact to never speak of what happened–but, a year later, someone leaves them that ominous note that they know, and comes after each of them wearing a slicker, a fisherman’s hat, and wielding a gutting hook. This movie spawned two sequels, each more ridiculously titled than the previous: I STILL Know What You Did Last Summer, and I’ll Always Know What You Did Last Summer.

The Remakes:

Texas Chainsaw Massacre/Halloween

Two of the granddaddy iconic independent films discussed above were recently re-made with huge budgets, hi-tech special effects, and story updates. While I have to say neither remake even comes close to the originals, both are enjoyable films. Michael Bay (who has been going on a classic horror film remake-athon, with the rights to Friday the 13th, Rosemary’s Baby, and A Nightmare on Elm Street–I shudder in fear, really I do) came out with his take on The Texas Chainsaw Massacre in 2003. Starring Jessica Biel, this revival of Leatherface includes a whole lot more gore, relying on blood, torture and shock scares. While I don’t think it’s anywhere near its source material, it’s a fun film to watch, popcorn in hand–and about the same nutritional value as said bowl of popcorn.

Halloween was released in 2007, reimagined by Rob Zombie. It’s effectively a prequel–showing Michael’s growing disturbed nature, his reliance on masks, his sociopathic behavior–leading up to the murder of his older sister, which happens at the halfway mark of the movie (as opposed to the opening of the original). It also includes a lot of blood, gritty camera work and settings, and gore. I really like Rob Zombie. I love his original movies. But I think Halloween was just ok–it almost had TOO much gore, too much of the same with Michael lumbering around and killing people left and right. By around 2/3 through the movie I found myself just wanting Laurie to shut up and die already (does that make me a bad person?). It was so much of the same shock that I felt desensitized to it…but still, the first 1/2 of the movie is so strong, and it’s still a good film. Just, not as good as what I’ve come to expect from Mr. Zombie. Speaking of which…

The New Gems:

House of 1000 Corpses & The Devil’s Rejects

Rob Zombie made his directorial debut in 2003 with House of 1000 Corpses. Four college kids are driving across the country and decide they want to learn more about the villainous Dr. Satan, trying to find the site where he was hanged. Instead, they find the Firefly family–deranged, deadly murderers. The film is by the book in terms of conventions, but with a whole lot of blood, and some cartoonish characters. House I felt was good but not anything to write home about, but still a pretty strong debut from Mr. Zombie. I totally jumped onboard the bandwagon, however, with The Devil’s Rejects in 2005. A sequel to House, Rejects opens with a police raid on the Firefly’s farm. Only two members escape with their lives, Baby Firefly (played ridiculously well by Sheri Moon Zombie) and Otis. They hook up with Baby’s father, Captain Spalding, to try and bust out Baby’s mother from jail. There’s a lot of weirdness along the way as the Firefly’s seek aid and shelter, they discover that Mama has been killed, and ultimately it all culminates in a powerful, brilliant ending. What I love so much about this film is that it is told from the perspective of the Firefly family–we learn about them as people, and deranged killers that they are, you actually sympathize with them. It’s all very dirty and grainy in what is becoming Rob Zombie’s trademark style, and reminiscent of those true Grindhouse films of the ’60s and ’70s.

Hatchet

Largely unnoticed, Hatchet is pretty freaking great. The tagline: “It’s not a remake, it’s not a sequel, and it’s not based on a Japanese one.” HAH! They had me at hello. A group of tourists heads out to a haunted Louisiana Bayou, and they learn the story of Victor Crowley:

Once there was a boy named Victor Crowley. He was born hideously deformed, and sadly, folks weren’t too kind to him. So he spent most of his life hidden in his Daddy’s house out in the bayou. One Halloween night, the local children came throwing firecrackers at the house to tease and scare him. And the old Crowley house caught fire.

When Victor’s Daddy arrived home, the house was in flames. He went to the barn, grabbed himself a hatchet, and started chopping down the front door. But what he didn’t know was that Victor was pressed up against the other side, trying to get out. He hit him square in the face with that hatchet…

…and poor Victor Crowley died.

The old man went into mourning and became a recluse after that. Never to leave the house. Never spoke to anyone. He finally passed away about ten years later.

And that’s when the stories started.

They say people tend to disappear in that swamp. And if you get close enough to the old Crowley house at night, you can still hear Victor Crowley. Still roaming in the woods. Still crying for his Daddy.

Guess what happens to the tourists?

Hatchet features an all-star cast (from Robert “Freddy Krueger” Englund to Tony “Candyman” Todd), a morbidly funny storyline, and in a recent genre mired in soulless sequels or ripoff remakes, it is delightfully original.

High Tension & The Hills Have Eyes

My favorite new horror director has to be Alexandre Aja. Both of these movies are awesome, in my opinion. In High Tension, college friends Marie and Alex go to stay at Alex’s family’s rural home. That night, Marie lies awake and witnesses a man entering the home and brutally (and I mean BRUTALLY) murder the entire family, and abduct Alex. Marie, desperate to help her friend, follows the murderer’s truck, and tries to find help for her friend, only to witness more murder and bloodshed–with a twist at the end which perhaps isn’t very original, but still effective.

The Hills Have Eyes is Aja’s remake of the 1977 film by Wes Craven. Given that I loved High Tension (for reasons I’ll explain shortly), I went to the theaters to see this remake–and holy crap, I was not disappointed! A family drives westward to California for vacation, but gets trickedinto taking the wrong road, and are systematically picked off by a family of mutant cannibals.

What gets me about both movies is the directing–Aja has an incredible, unflinching way of making a movie. Both films are incredibly graphic (I highly recommend watching them as they were intended–get the unrated versions)–but unlike say the Saw movies or the Hostel films (Hostel 1 is decent, but still lacking that…I dunno…OOMF), Aja imbues a sense of true dread in every frame. In the aptly titled High Tension, I could actually feel my heart rate skyrocketing–and it was in French, on my tv at home, with all the lights on. In The Hills Have Eyes, this is more pronounced with a bigger budget and better actors (the scene with the burning outside, distracting most of the family while two sisters inside are being attacked is incredibly effective). I don’t think I can say enough good things about Aja’s style. He is the only reason I would dain to watch Mirrors (which looks stupid) in theaters (although due to the boyfriend, who does not share my enthusiasm for horror, I will have to wait for the dvd release).

PHEW. So there you have it, my list of influential and favorite slasher movies. Have any favorites I’ve forgotten? Make a case for or against the list? Post away!

**Note–I know I promised another list of international horror films, but I’ve run out of time! That’s ok–we’ll save it for next year.**

I was just checking out Graeme’s blog (which is awesome, by the way), where he had a link to this:

The Outbreak

It’s a Choose Your Own Adventure, but for the Zombie Apocalypse. AWESOMENESS. The trailer is below…

Do you think you’re ready? Think YOU can outsmart the walking dead? I survived after 3 tries. Yeap. Probaby safe to say that should the zombie apocalypse strike, for all my love of the movies, I’d die pretty quickly!

Now it’s your turn! See if you can survive…THE OUTBREAK!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

Thea: So, now you’ve read one of my Desert Island Keepers! What was your first impression of the novel?

Ana:

Astonishment.

I started reading it with not a small amount of trepidation. Not only this was my first full length Stephen King novel (not counting The Gunslinger which is so short – I loved it by the way) but hailed as one of the scariest books in the known universe.

But to my surprise, the opening chapter was scary yes, but it was so touching with the relationship between Bill and his younger brother Georgie, who dies right there and then, setting things in motion. I was expecting pure, unabashed horror and all I got was heart. Pure and simple heart. I was hooked as I felt my emotions leaping into the book and connecting with the kids’.

From there on, my amazement only progressed and grew tenfold as we get a glimpse into the adult life of the characters and once again, I was surprised that the writing was so good and in a few pages, Stephen King showed me who these people were.

THEN, the horror starts as each of them starts remembering their forgotten childhood, and there was this sense of mystery about the why or how but also this beautiful flowing back and forth between now and then until all comes into place. It is a tour the force, an ambitious project that pans out until about ¾ of the novel when it all comes crumbling down like a sand castle washed by sea waves.

Thea: Which of the “Losers Club” was your favorite and why?

Ana:

Easy peasy: Ben. You know how much I love romance – so this bias of mine probably account for Ben being my favorite because out of all the kids he was the knight in shinning armour – the one that was always protecting and thinking about Bev. The way he loved her, how he felt about her, it was so sweet and tender. Plus there is the fact that he was so smart and the library was his favorite place. And my heart was swelling with tenderness as this fat, bullied, lonely kid finds solace in the friendship with the others.

I don’t get the overstated special allure of Bill – I mean he was as cool as the other kids but the story and memory I wanted to read the most was always Ben’s.

My second favorite was loud-mouthed Ritchie!

Thea: What was the scariest part of the novel for you (if any parts at all)?

Ana:

The scariest part? It was not all the times “It” showed up. Oh no. Although that was pretty scary, with the clown, the ghosts, the voices * shudder *. ( I haven’t been able to sleep for over a week now)

No, the scariest part of the novel was actually all the showdowns between Bev and her father and between the kids and Henry Bowers. Because these people were so bad and so cruel and mentally unbalanced but also so very real and within the realm of possibility – the abuse and the bullying can happen anywhere, any time, in REAL life and that is such a horrendous thought- that they scared the shit out of me. I felt Henry Bowers could kill and hurt any of them more even than It. But if was even worse because Henry himself was bullied by his own father in a vicious circle that is, unfortunately, so believable.

Thea: What things did you love the most about this book? What did you hate the most?

Ana:

What I loved the most – Of course, the friendship between the kids – it is the heart and soul of the novel. The moments where they are still so innocent playing together or talking, or just making fun of each other. Each scene when they were together was great – and I burst into laughter as much as they did in the book. I connected with them in such a way, I was terrified at the ugly, scary things that kept happening to all of them. I wanted to protect them, to nurse them, to play with them. I was in pins and needles worrying that any of them would die and it was terrible, terrible to feel so.

What I hated the most – The ending. More on that below.

Also I thought some of the interludes were boring and pointless – in fact, I thought the novel was unnecessarily long.

Thea: What do you think is the strongest theme of the novel? What affected you the most?

Ana:

I would say that the strongest theme of the novel is the bond of friendship and the horrors of real life – more so than the loss of innocence, although that is very present as well. But without the friendship they shared nothing would have been possible.

What affected me the most -would you believe if I said it was the relationship between some of the kids and their parents? Like Eddie when he realises that his mother has been giving him placebo medicine to control him? Or how Bill’s parents shut him off after Georgie’s death? Or the worst of all, Bev and her parents? That was terrifying beyond comprehension.

They were alone dude, alone, they could not rely on anyone except themselves and so we are back to the theme of friendship. And how towards the end, Stephen managed to DESTROY every wonderful he created to that point with a turn of events that was stupid beyond belief.

SPOILERS FOLLOW HERE–Ana talks about the ending and why she was so disturbed by the novel.

Thea: So, let’s talk about the ending. You hated it–what exactly turned you off to the book?

Ana:

It started somewhere around the 1000th page – up to that point, I had the clear impression that I was reading one of the best books of my life.

Then, they went into the smoke tent to have the vision and lo an behold, Ritchie and Mike have the vision of what It was – and how It had come…..from outer space or from the macro-universe or whatever as we learn later on. That was the first signal of alert. I rolled my eyes and I was sad that this was the explanation for It – (I had created this theory in mind that It was actually a creation of Derry’s rotten citizens) . But later on it gets worse – because It happens to be a primordial being that exists since the dawn of time and there is a turtle and the turtle is older than It. And we get a glimpse into Its mind and It was SCARED. Of a bunch of kids. The thing that has been terrorising Derry for such a long time and is hands down of the scariest shits I have ever read about, is scared. That killed any terror I have felt up to that point. Talk about absurd.

But that was not the worse, oh no. That first sign of alert was not enough to put be me off.

I trotted on and then GODDAMN IT Bill and Bev have sex. I started to cry, because it felt so so soooo wrong, I wanted Bev and Ben to be together, to have a real adult conversation, to learn about each other , etc. Ok, so this is my romantic self speaking so I still could have lived with it. But in the middle of the sex scene, Bev remembers something else from their first showdown with It when they were kids – that she, as a way of saving them all, decided that: SHE HAD TO HAVE SEX WITH ALL OF THEM.

It was like a jolt of pure electricity. I was like, “I did not just read this”. I read it again, then again, then again. Then I emailed you and asked if what I read was true. But it wasn’t enough, I broke my rule of not looking for spoilers and went to wikipedia and yes, it was true. I was stupefied, shocked, mystified. NO WAY.

The book died for me there and then. I didn’t even need to read the rest because everything I felt for the kids, all of a sudden, is all gone. I didn’t care anymore, I felt like quitting altogether. But I kept on, skipping huge chunks, feeling bereft once more when I read about the freaking spider and then, and then the absurd sex scene.

Thea: Despite the obvious tastelessness of adolescent sex, I felt that it served a place in the story, not only as Beverly’s way of saving her friends, but as more symbolic of their complete loss of innocence and the end of childhood. Is there a point of no return? Did this scene mean an automatic deal-breaker for you?

Ana:

Absolutely, yes. I don’t even know where to start.

First there is the obvious absurdity of the scene itself. So, they are on the run, lost in the underground passages , they are losing the bond with each other (why? Why were they losing the bond with each other AFTER all they have been through?) , then Bev decided the way to brind them together is to have sex with all of them.

Can I reiterate the fact that we are talking about 11 year old children? That is absolutely inappropriate and it irked me out entirely.

Then what REALLY bugs me the most is the very idea that only sex will bind people – not love, not care, not friendship, but sex. But if you have sex with someone, it stops being simple friendship and turns into something else – friendship can still be a part of it, of course.

But the premise is ridiculous and preposterous and sexist. One girl – six boys, all around 11 years old. Come one Stephen King are you freaking kidding me? I am not one to play around with “what ifs” but can we play around with the idea here?

This principle should hold in any scenario – now you tell me if there were six girls and one boy would he have to have sex with all of them? What if two of them were brother and sister? What if there was more than one girl in the group – would the boys have to have sex with both of them? Would the two girls have sex with each other? Furthermore, by having sex with Bev they are all connected to HER, but they are not connected to each other. They should have had sex with each other as well. But no, it is the girl who makes the great sacrifice.

AND, and you can’t tell me that this is not ridiculous – she hardly feels any pain, even though she is an 11 year old virgin, who up to that point didn’t even know that the penis would go into the vagina, even though there are no preliminaries, no lubrication, and Thea, she comes. SHE COMES, TWICE. After having been beaten up, almost raped by her own father, after facing the primordial evil being, after having sex with 4, she orgasms when she has sex with the last 2 boys – I can’t believe this. I am sorry, I just don’t.

The sense of absurdity is so great I can’t even begin to describe my despair. It hurts even more because for 1000 pages I was completely fascinated with this story.

But this ending was a stupid, pathetic, irrelevant, contrived way out and all the sense of wonderment I had with this novel went up like smoke in the air.

Thea: It confronts you and takes on the form of your greatest fear–what is it?

Ana:

You. Coming after me after you read the above.

Thea: How do you rate it?

Ana:

Up to page 1000 I would have easily rated it a 9 missing on a 10 because of the unnecessary length of the novel and some pretty boring passages. After the breaking point – the sex between Bill and Bev – it is a 1. My completely visceral reaction to that one scene of gang bang may seem completely blown out of proportion but this is really, in all honestly, how I feel. Couple that with the fact that the the last third of the book never lives up to the high, impossible expectations created by the first AMAZING 2/3 and there you have it: a 1. Our first ever. It hurts to say so, as I did really really loved most part of it but I felt betrayed in the end, so I want the hours I spent reading this book, back.

I wonder how other people feel about this. Am I the crazy one here?

**THEA’S NOTE: SINCE it is Halloween Week and Thea has assumed control of the blog, she is totally rebutting Ana’s way-harsh comments.**

REBUTTAL: I really can’t let this go undefended (certainly not on ‘my’ week, either!) *straps on Commando vest and puts on war paint*

Ok, I get that the sex part will ick out some readers. Especially readers of the romance persuasion such as dear Ana. BUT, if you have read this far into the novel (we’re talking around pg 1000 here), you will know that Bev’s character is in large part defined by her shitty life at home. Her father beats her, abuses her almost to the point of sexual abuse–he constantly accuses Bevvy of being a bad girl, fooling around/sleeping with ‘those boys’–when nothing could be farther from the truth. How many times do we see this in her little flashbacks? I think then it kind of makes sense that this is her way of saving her friends, in addition to being that very strong–and yes saddening–way of ending her childhood. *Note: As to the whole not hurting and orgasm thing, I don’t know what to say(this is getting to be a weird conversation!)–they are all eleven years old, so theoretically they all wouldn’t be very…big. And she does hurt. Moving on!*

I’m not a fan of the sex, but I don’t see it as being a deal-breaker for the novel. It was important to the story in that it saved them and allowed them to find their way together (as to Ana’s claim that the loss of their bond after everything they had been through together is silly, I say that clearly they hadn’t fully defeated it, and the evil wasn’t over–since they had to return 30 years later!). And I disagree about the sex being meaningless–going past the grossness that these are 11 year olds (that have seen more disgusting things in their lives and have battled an ancient evil), their bond was always based on their love and friendship. It’s not as though Bev just pulled her pants down and said let’s have at it ‘cuz I’m horny! They close their pact with sex and then with a blood oath, to promise to return to fight It should It ever come back.

Regardless, even if the sex part is wrong and gross–is it enough to derail your entire reading experience with the novel? It’s a teeny tiny part of the story that can be skipped or skimmed over. And it’s not even the end of the book, as Ana’s reaction would suggest!!!!

If you keep reading past the ONE SCENE, the book ends on hope. It’s a book about sacrifice as well–not just Beverly, but more importantly with Eddie using his inhaler to stop It once again and dying in the process, with Mike in the hospital near death after stopping Henry Bowers, with Bill finally finishing the ritual of Chud for the second time.

And the final ending!!!!! With Bill riding his bike again, helping Audra, to outride and beat the devil one last time…these all are factors to me that outweigh any misgivings about that one, tiny scene.

And dude, a ONE?!?! Really!??! A ONE!??!! I’ve never even given a book that ultimate low rating. Wow.

So far as to what IT is and where it comes from, the importance of the Turtle, etc–all I can say is, if you read the Dark Tower books, this all makes a whole lot more sense. And again, in my opinion the important thing isn’t where It came from, but the fact that it is there, in the town, fed by fear and awakened by the depravity and horror that resides in people.

So there you have it. Opposite ends of the spectrum. Ana gives It the lowest grade ever given on this blog, while Thea hands out one of her extremely rare 10s. If you’ve read the book, or want to comment, we’d love to hear from you. Where do you stand?

Title: It

Novel by Stephen King

TV Movie directed by Tommy Lee Wallace; teleplay by Lawrence D. Cohen & Tommy Lee Wallace; Starring Tim Curry, Richard Thomas, John Ritter, Annette O’Toole, Jonathan Brandis, Brandon Crane, and Seth Green.

It is one of my all time favorite novels, and remains to this day one of the scariest books I have ever read. When I get stranded on a desert island, It is one of the five books coming with me. Adjectives like graphic, powerful and emotional come to mind when trying to describe this novel. For me, It is King at his finest hour, writing about what he does best–a small Maine town, wracked with ugliness and hate, the endurance and strength of youth, and the loss of innocence, when faced with unspeakable horror.

“The terror, which would not end for another twenty-eight years–if it ever did end–began, so far as I can know or tell, with a boat made from a sheet of newspaper floating down a gutter swollen with rain.”

Thus opens the novel, with a story of two brothers–Stuttering Bill Denbrough and his younger brother Georgie. On a rainy afternoon in Derry, Maine, Bill makes his brother Georgie a paper boat. With Bill too sick to go outside and sail the the ship on its maiden voyage, Georgie plays by himself, setting it afloat in the rainwater flooding the street gutters. But, as boats afloat in street gutters are want to do, Georgie’s precious new toy falls into a storm drain, and Georgie is crushed…until a clown appears in the sewer, holding the boat. The figure in the drain introduces himself as Pennywise the Dancing Clown, and offers Georgie a balloon, and his boat back. Innocent, curious Georgie accepts, and pays dearly for his brother’s boat with his life.

It follows a group of seven misfits, the members of a self-proclaimed “Losers Club”, as they discover that some thing is very wrong in Derry, terrorizing and killing the town’s children. Bill Denbrough becomes the leader of the group, sharing his strength and determination to stop the murderer of his brother, no longer hidden by his stuttering. Eddie Kaspbrack is best friend to Bill, and by way of his domineering, manipulative mother is an asthmatic hypochondriac. Ben “Haystack” Hanscom, overweight and the new boy in town, joins up with Bill and Eddie after they help him evade local bully Henry Bowers. Richie “Trashmouth” Tozier is the joker of the group, doing impersonations and reeling off wisecracks; he has an impulsive, defiant streak as he mouths off to just about anyone. Beverly Marsh is the darling of the group, a beautiful girl but ostracized by her classmates because her family is poor, and her father works as a school janitor. Stan Uris is a very logical, methodical boy, who is bullied because he is studious, reserved, and Jewish. The last member of the club is Mike Hanlon, singled out by bully Henry Bowers because he is black. When Mike tries to escape their taunts, the seven ‘losers’ come together for the first time, standing down Henry and his gang, throwing rocks and landing blows (one of my favorite scenes of the novel). Mike, cataloguing and photography enthusiast, takes a picture of them that day–and the Losers Club is officially formed.

The seven soon realize that they have more in common than just being outsiders–each of them has had a first-hand encounter with something terrifying, and together they figure out that It is the same being, some kind of shapeshifting monster that feeds on children, assuming the form of their worst fears. It is the same creature that ripped Bill’s brother Georgie’s arm off as Pennywise the Dancing Clown and that devours Patrick Hockstetter as a swarm of leeches…and Bill is determined to fight and kill It.

The book is told in two parallel stories–one that follows the children fighting It back in 1957-1958, and then as adults in 1984-1985. The adult seven find out that they did not end up defeating It back when they were children, and they must return to Derry, to the nightmare reunited, and finish the job they started nearly thirty years before.

It is such a powerful book, not just because of the terrifying and graphic horror sequences with Pennywise (the drain scene, the photographs, the house and the sewers, etc), but because of the characters. Meeting the seven characters, both as adults and as children, learning what they had faced together, seeing them as successful adults, and the numbing horror that they physically could not remember their pasts in Derry–it’s strong stuff. I came to love each of these characters, fearing for them, hoping for them, rooting for them each step of the way. Who says that horror has no soul, no appreciation for intelligent characterizations and and emotions? I dare any one of those critics to read this novel and not be moved by it.

Not to misguide anyone, however, into thinking this is a book without its share of gore and horror–because it is. Pennywise the Dancing Clown, with his silver eyes, multitude of floating balloons and his sanity-stealing deadlights scares the crap out of me. Always has, always will. It isn’t just the monster that scares, though. It awakens only when cataclysmic events, of intense hate or pain or depravity occur–and in 1984, the story begins with the senseless murder of a homosexual man. The people of Derry, from folks like Beverly Marsh’s abusive father to the neighbors that simply look away from the violence and murder before their very eyes, get as good as they give. Racism, homophobia, and self interest drive the small town–as Don Haggarty says at the beginning of the novel, “[Derry's] a lot like a dead strumpet with maggots squirming out of her cooze…It’s a bad place.” Above all else, It is a story about the loss of innocence, and one that I love wholeheartedly.

Years later I would read The Dark Tower series by King and, having amassed quite a few King novels under my belt by this time, be amazed by how many of his different novels were related to the Dark Tower nexus. As Roland would say, all things serve the beam, and It (especially the origins of It and the importance of the Turtle) ties in beautifully.

In 1990, a television movie was produced based on the novel, titled Stephen King’s It. I have to confess, I first saw the movie before reading the novel (I was around 12 years old the first time I saw it, and pretty quickly afterwards I sped off to the library to find the book). Perhaps this makes me slightly partial to the film adaptation–I believe this to be (easily) the best Stephen King small screen adaptation, and one of my favorite television movies, period. Certainly, I think it is the scariest tv movie I have ever seen–as a kid the same age as those in the book and in the film, it held even more meaning for me.

The movie is pretty loyal to the source material, at least, as loyal as it can be given time, budget, and ratings restrictions. The homophobia is cut out, some of the more graphic scenes (Henry cutting Ben’s stomach, for example) are deleted, as are certain portions of the book altogether (the whole Patrick Hocksetter character, the entirety of the scene in the decrepit house, the scene with Beverly after they defeat It for the first time as children). But, where it does stay true is capturing the camaraderie of the seven “losers”, tempering the fear of It with the strength of friendship, balancing horror with the happier aspects of young kids on summer vacation, finding strength and happiness with each other. And, for all that it cuts down on the gore and more graphic nature of some of It’s violence, the film proves that it doesn’t always take buckets of blood to terrify–relying on it’s awesome score and soundtrack, strong acting performances, and more ominous symbolic methods (bloody footprints, a lone balloon that explodes with blood). I’ve always been a proponent of claymation and stopmotion, as well as more hands on make-up and prop methods for special effects (as opposed to a lazy reliance on CGI) so far as horror movies are concerned, and It does this very well, also by relying on atmosphere and acting over costly (and often ineffective) effects. *Although I think the film could use an update, especially for that last battle and the visualization of the deadlights.*

Casting-wise, It strikes solid gold with Tim Curry as Pennywise.

His voice, his maniacal smile, his laugh, his delivery, the way his eyes get all red from the thick layer of makeup…holy crap, Tim Curry scares the shit out of me with his Pennywise! His script also sticks very closely to many of Pennywise’s lines from the book (“They float, Georgie. They all float.”; “You’ll die if you try to fight me. You’ll die if you try…”), and perhaps I have been spoiled by his performance. Certainly I cannot picture Pennywise any differently than Tim Curry in terrifying makeup and costume.

So far as the rest of the cast, I like the child actors they picked, in particular Stuttering Bill, Ben, and Richie (Bill played by Jonathan Brandis–who I used to have a crush on; Richie by a very young Seth Green). I would have chosen a different Beverly, but the young actress who plays her still does a great job. The adult actors for the children, however, are not so great. Annette O’Toole is a fine adult Bev, and the other actors for Mike, Stan, and Eddie I think are well selected. John Ritter as older Ben is fine by me, but not my ideal choice. I think Bill is the biggest miss–not that Richard Thomas (of The Waltons fame) does a bad job, but he’s just not Bill. Still, Tim Curry’s excellence is enough to overshadow any casting shortcomings!

The only other huge notable change from the book to the film is the nature of the battles with It, including the ultimate adult showdown–and if you’ve read the book, you have to admit there really isn’t much you can do to translate that more metaphorical, dream-like confrontation to film. The ritual of Chud is not an easy thing to visualize on screen–especially not in a relatively low budget tv movie. The special effects could use some work, as I mentioned earlier, but for the most part, I am pleased with the way both confrontation scenes are handled.

What else can I say about the book and the film? They are both superb–and I hope that everyone gives It a try.

Verdict:

Movie: 9 Damn Near Perfection, suffering only from some off-kilter casting, dated effects, and PG rating

Stick around as later Ana gives her take on the book–I get to grill her about her opinion! But for now, I leave you with a clip.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

So, The Evil Dead movies . I am so ignorant in terms of horror that I hadn’t even heard of these until I met Thea and she started her campaign for me to watch them. When time came for Halloween Week, it was item number one on her infamous list of essentials and I decided to man-up and bought all of them.

I am a firm believer in the benefits of ripping the band-aid at once so I made a call for a Marathon. But being the wimp that I am there was no way I would watch these by myself, so I begged convinced Dear Partner to watch them with me. Now, Dear Partner is not a big fan of gore and it took me a lot of bargaining and promises to make him say yes (take your mind out of the gutter, will you?) which include the prospect of seeing my dreaded ironing board again – an item that hasn’t been spotted inside the house for oh, 3 years? Some back massages may or may not have been included in the deal. Needless to say, I start the movie already in the red. But Dear Partner is a happy camper, oh yes he is. The bastard .

So I bring out the beer, the popcorn (also part of the deal), coffee and chicken + thyme flavoured potato crisps. Let the marathon begin!

Evil Dead

Five (supposedly) students are going to spend a weekend at an isolated cabin (I am already rolling my eyes right here – cliché scenario number 1 – why must it be an isolated cabin in the middle of the woods of doom?) – whilst they are driving there something is following them and the eerie music is already giving me goosebumps. Something is clearly out to get them , it is only a question of when and how. At the house (seriously, who rented this place? I would so ask my money back) they find a book-( the Necronomicon , the Book of the Dead) and they discover in the basement an old tape recorder which they play. In the tape the former owner of the house, an university professor tells how the book is a book that summons demons and of course HE READS THE TRANSLATION OF THE SUMMONING SPELL. Come on. Hell breaks lose, scary things start to happen (I close eyes, peek through my fingers, grab Dear Partner’s hand over and over again) and one by one the students get possessed. First one up is Cheryl who somehow, thinks that IT IS SAFE TO GO OUTSIDE TO INVESTIGATE A NOISE. In the dark. Alone. In the middle of the wood. AFTER strange, scary things happen. Let’s pause here. Isn’t that stupid??

This scene just cements the fact that I don’t get horror and it is clearly not for me. The weirdest thing is: I like stupid. Some of my favourite TV Shows and movies are in reality, stupidity fiestas. Proof:

The thing is these are funny-stupid , and not please-kill-me-now stupid.

Play again.

The woman is raped by the woods and I finally learn what tree sex mean.

I wish I hadn’t though. Her brother Ash , who seems to be hero of this trilogy but I have no faith in him so far, does the first intelligent thing and decides to drive her home. Of course, the way is blocked they have to go back and more strange-scary/stupid things happen, one by one the demons possess them (close my eyes! Close my eye! Aaaaaaaaa) and then they all kill each other and it’s very violent and very graphic and dear lord how much fake blood was used in the movie?

In the end: Ash is the sole survivor. Do I care? No. Was it scary? Hell, yes!

I have rolled my eyes more times than I care to count; I ate far too much fattening finger food and it’s only movie # 1; and the acting, omg the acting! It’s ridiculous. Although this is rather scary and atmospheric which I am guessing it’s good when it comes to horror, I am firmly standing on the “what a load of crap” camp. So far, I do not see the appeal.

I am not too excited about watching the others right now. But a promise is a promise (damn you , Thea!!!). I look at Dear Partner and ask if he is ready to proceed, he just shrugs and gives me The Look. Bugger. I Press play.

Evil Dead 2

It starts and I can already see that the special effects are much superior. There is a rundown about the Necronomicon and there is Ash and his girlfriend inside a car driving through the woods of doom, again. Towards the isolated cabin. Again.

And I am like WTF? Why is he going back to a cabin in the middle of the wood???? Hasn’t he learnt anything??????? Five seconds later he finds the book again, listens to the tape and five seconds after that, the girlfriend is possessed , killed, buried , resurrected as a skeleton ballerina in what has got to be the quickest death-recovery in the history of cinema. I am confused.

Dear Partner wants to quit watching. I decide it’s time to bring out the Secret Weapon. I say: if you go , I will have to eat that whoooole pot of Ben and Jerry’s Cookie Dough ice cream aaaaaall by myself. He says he doesn’t believe I would be able to deny him his favorite ice cream *snorts * it’s hard to be with someone that knows me so well. I decide to use Secret Weapon #2 and make my cute widdle Ana face and that does it. While I go to the kitchen to get the ice cream , I ask him to google Evil dead 2 and it turns out that Sam Raimi did not have the rights to the first movie so instead of showing shots of the first movie, he does it again only different. So, basically the first few minutes are a re-rash of the first movie, but not quite. As soon as Ash is alone, it is a whole different thing. Evil dead 2 is really Evil Dead 1 AND a sequel at the same time. Genius. I am calling it Evil dead 2.0.

We resume the movie.

Now, Ash is trapped in the cabin of inevitable ruin and little by little, he starts to be driven mad. A lot of cliché tricks that get me.every.time like the piano playing all by itself, the empty chair that rocks. I am scared all over again. But this time…it’s good. This time, I actually like Ash. And I like him even more as he gets possessed, then de-possessed, then the head of his girlfriend attacks him like a freaking piranha fish and won’t let go his hand. Then the HAND gets possessed and he is beating himself up all over the kitchen floor – holy guacamole he may not be the greatest actor ever, but there is great physical comedy here. This is supposed to be funny right? Because I am really enjoying it now.

Then he chops his own hand! Blood spurts all over ewwwwwwwwww. Ash is clearly going insane!

Then he is joined by a bunch of idiots, a trailer trash chick and her boyfriend, the professor’s daughter and her man. They learn that the professor’s wife is buried in the cellar – where they just locked Ash thinking he is bad. The woman in there is much creepier than the ones in the first movie and yet, still camp. One of the women decides that it’s safer alone outside in the dark and runs. Tree sex again!!!

Best Ash quote from this movie:

Lets get down to that cellar and carve ourselves a witch

There is the return of the Chainsaw which is put to good use this time. This is a vaste improvement over the first one. No doubt about that – it is less scary though. And less atmospheric. There are still loads of blood but this one is way cooler. And I begin to really like Ash.

In the end, Ash is sucked by a time warp and taken back to the 14th century. I have eaten more shit and am feeling sick to my stomach. I can’t eat anything anymore but I guess I can still find some room for more beer. The cliff-hanger takes us directly into the next movie. This time, we don’t even have to think. Bring it on.

Army of Darkness

It opens and Ash is a prisoner of a lord and is being taken to his castle. He starts to remember his life before going to the cabin – how he had a job and a girlfriend Linda OMG I have a moment of befuddlement – the girlfriend is Bridget Fonda? But she was not Bridget Fonda before! Was she? NO, she was NOT. Anyways, he has been captured as a member of the army of Henry the Red who presents himself

Duke Henry: You’re not one of my vassals… who are you?
Ash: Who wants to know?
Duke Henry: I am Henry the Red. Duke of Shale, Lord of the Northlands and leader of its peoples.
Ash: Well hello Mister Fancypants. Well, I’ve got news for you pal, you ain’t leadin’ but two things: Jack and shit… and Jack just left town.

I laugh hysterically at that.

I am really enjoying this one so far.

He is thrown into the pit of Destruction and fire of hell and puts quite a fight and wins the possessed witch inside! When he comes up again, he shots his gun and gives quite the speech:

Alright, you primitive screw-heads, listen up! See this? This… is my boomstick! – [continuing nonchalantly] – It’s a twelve-gauge, double-barreled Remington. S-Mart’s top of the line. You can find this in the sporting goods department. That’s right, this sweet baby was made in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Retails for about $109.95. It’s got a walnut stock, cobalt-blue steel, and a hair trigger. That’s right… shop smart. Shop S-Mart… You got that?!!

I email Thea as we watch the movie to tell her that somewhere between movies 1 and 3 Ash had built quite a body and has become a badass! She tells me it’s because he is pissed off. Well. Thank god.

(Side note: I am no gun expert but how many rounds will he have?)

So an old wise man , tells him he must go and find the Necronomicon bring it back so that they can vanquish the Army of Darkness and Ash can go back to his time. He goes and stops by a mill where several mini-Ash (yeah really) and then Evil Ash shows up and things are very farcical and ludicrous.

Ash: What are you? Are you me?
Evil Ash: What are do? Are you me? HAHAHAHAHAH! You sound like a jerk!
Ash: Why ya doin’ this, huh?
Evil Ash: Oh, you wanna know? ‘Cause the answer’s easy! I’m BAD Ash… and you’re GOOD Ash! You’re a goody little two-shoes! Little goody two-shoes! Little goody two-shoes!
[begins to sucker-punch Ash]
Evil Ash: Little goody TWO-SHOES! Little goody TWO-SHOES! HEHEHEHEHE!
[honk honk honk]
Evil Ash: LITTLE GOODY TWO-SHOES! HEHEHE
Ash: [cocks shotgun and points it under Evil Ash's nose]
Ash: [fires shotgun] I’m not THAT good.

Sure, I could have stayed in the past. I could have even been king. But in my own way, I am king. [grabs girl close] Hail to the king, baby. [Ash kisses the girl]

Title: Marvel Zombies

Author: Robert Kirkman, Sean Phillips

Genre: Graphic Novel, Horror

Stand alone or series: First Graphic novel in what is now a collection of 3 Marvel Zombie specials

Summary: (From amazon.com)
Torn from the pages of Ultimate Fantastic Four! On an Earth shockingly similar to the Marvel Universe’s, an alien virus has mutated all of the world’s greatest super heroes into flesh-eating monsters! It took them only hours to destroy life as we know it – but what happens when they run out of humans to eat?! Follow their search for more food, and witness the arrival of the Silver Surfer! Collects Marvel Zombies #1-5.

Why did I read the book: I had this book since Thea reviewed it a few months ago and the time has come to read it since it’s Halloween Week and all.

Review:

When Thea waswe were organizing Halloween Week, Bossypants Darling Thea gave me a list of essential movies and books I had to catch up with. From ghosts to demons, from werewolves to zombies, the freaking list was a complete nightmare of gigantic proportions to a coward like me who doesn’t do horror – specially NOT ghosts and zombies. And gore. And demonic possession. You get the drift.

So I said no way, Jose to some of the stuff in the dreadful list (Thea was delusional if she thought I was going to watch the Exorcist – HA!) but ended up caving saying yes sir to most of it. With one exception, every single item on the list represented a major challenge for me. This one exception, the one item I was actually looking forward to reading was Marvel Zombies. It has been sitting on my TBR pile since Thea’s awesome review a few months back and finally FINALLY I was able to pick it up.

I mean, it’s Marvel heroes….turned into zombies. What could be more ludicrous than that? Truth be said, I don’t have much experience with zombies, I avoid them like the plague and I think I only have watched ONE zombie flick so far and ONLY because it was a comedy with these guys:

Notable Quotes/ Parts: Just to show how crazy, warped this book is. Zombie Giant- Man keeps the uninfected Black Panther prisoner in his lab, keeping him alive as food source – unbeknownst to the other Zombies. He has been feeding from him little by little, first fingers, then hand, then his leg until Black Panther manages to escape with the help of Giant-Man’s wife’s AKA The Wasp, talking bodiless’ head. Yeah. Really. Cool.

Additional Thoughts: I found a recipe book at the Marvel’s website:

Galactus Pie

Ingredients
1 teaspoon shortening
1 pound ground Galactus thighs and biceps
1 pound diced Silver Surfer breast
1 pound green onions, chopped
1 pod garlic, minced
1 bell pepper, chopped
1 onion, chopped
1 tablespoon flour

Melt shortening in heavy pot. Add Galactus and Surfer meat. Cook until pink is gone (Surfer meat may take longer, melt off shiny cosmic shell). Add vegetables and season for taste (season well, as meat will lose seasoning during frying). When meat is done and vegetables glazed, remove from heat and preserve excess liquid. Stir in 1 tablespoon flour.

Sift dry ingredients together. Cut in shortening. Beat egg and add to milk. Mix gradually into dry ingredients until proper consistency. Break into small pieces and roll.

Cook in fat until golden brown. Drain and serve hot.

(Warning! Cosmic powers may develop after consumption)

Verdict: Cool and funny, with a way-out-there premise that is both gutsy and creative.

Rating: 7. Very good.

Reading Next: It by Stephen King.

As I believe I have mentioned before, I am a zombie enthusiast. Really. Peruse my dvd collection, and this quickly becomes apparent. On the regular, I have zombie dreams. I even have a mock-zombie escape route from work and my apartment, should the apocalypse ever strike. (No I don’t really believe in an impending zombie apocalypse…but it can’t hurt to be prepared, right?)

So, needless to say, I’m a big fan. In honor of our ZOMBIES ATTACK! day for Halloween Week, I present you with my essentials list of zombie literature and movies!

BOOKS:

The Zombie Survival Guide by Max Brooks

Max Brooks, son of legendary Mel Brooks, writes this hilarious, and shockingly comprehensive guidebook. The reason why this book works is because it takes its subject material dead serious–planning for every conceivable location of an attack, the best weapons to use, the best vehicles to procure, etc. For example, he discusses the merits of a flame thrower versus a revolver, and those of a motorcycle versus a hummer. Should there ever be a zombie apocalypse, I’ll be thanking Max Brooks for this book! Really, it’s just a good, fun read. Highly recommended!

World War Z: An Oral History of the Zombie War by Max Brooks

Following up on the success of The Zombie Survival Guide, Max Brooks tries his hand at fiction with World War Z. Instead of a formal novel, this book collects fictional memoirs of survivors of the zombie apocalypse. Not only is Mr. Brooks a master at characterizations of the different survivors and capturing a different ‘voice’ for each of them, but he also manages to weave an incredibly smart social commentary with each story–criticizing the ineptitude of government response (in the aftermath of Katrina this critique holds even stronger sway), and the failings of humans in terms of ethnic, political, religious and socio-economic discrimination. While on the surface it is an engaging zombie novel, Max Brooks does for the literary genre what George Romero did decades earlier with his classic films–using the zombie as a means of commentary, to convey the failings of society.

The Walking Dead by Robert Kirkman

Robert Kirkman’s serious, well developed series follows a group of human survivors in the throws of a zombie apocalypse. The monthlies have been in publication since 2003, and are still going strong (although I don’t think the recent issues can compare to the superb first few arcs). Drawing heavily from George A. Romero’s films, Mr. Kirkman tells a compelling tale about a true apocalypse–it’s the end of the world, and this is some serious stuff with real gravity. With each issue we learn a little more about the characters, and they become more–forgive the pun–fleshed out. Definitely essential reading material for any fan of comics, apocalyptic tales, and (of course) zombies.

Marvel Zombies/Marvel Zombies 2/Marvel Zombies 3 written by Robert Kirkman (1&2) and Fred Van Lente (3)

Speaking of Robert Kirkman, The Marvel Zombies collections are ridiculously good fun. The first arc, opening with Magneto on the run from a swarm of ravenous, undead Marvel superheroes completely took me by surprise–and I loved every disgusting, hilarious minute of it. The second arc is still great fun, if somewhat predictable and repetitive. The third arc, however, is pretty damn cool–these issues just came out this month. And a brief word about the artwork–it is, simply put, stunning. I love the zombified imaginings of our favorite Marvel characters, especially with the collection of covers! Each issue of the first two storyarcs is a play on classic comic book covers, and the third arc instead is a play on classic horror movie posters! Really, brilliance, I say! (Later today Ana will review Marvel Zombies 1, so stay tuned.)

Marvel Zombies: Dead Days by Arthur Suydam/Marvel Zombies vs. The Army of Darkness by John Layman and Robert Kirkman

Just because I love Ash so. No, seriously, the one shot and crossover tie in really nicely with the Marvel Zombies collections listed previously. With these two prequels, we learn how the plague was initially spread. Plus…it’s Army of Darkness. With superhero zombies. It doesn’t get any better than that!

The Living Dead anthology with Neil Gaiman, Stephen King, Dan Simmons, George R.R. Martin, Joe Hill, and others

Confession: I was planning on having a review for this anthology for today, but I have not been able to finish it (it’s approximately 500 pages long–I swear I’m not lazy!). What I have read, I have loved. Really–just look at the author list! This anthology is incredibly well rounded, and I am loving each story in here. The editor, John Joseph Adams, does a fantastic job–one of the finest anthologies I have ever had the pleasure of reading (and I’m not even finished with it yet!).

Cell by Stephen King

You knew I’d have to have at least ONE King novel on this list, didncha? Cell takes a morbid look at our dependence on cellular phones and creates a zombie apocalypse-type story. One afternoon, a signal is sent out, and everyone on a cellular phone goes completely balls insane–we’re talking unspeakable, irrational violence. The survivors try to escape the mayhem, but soon the ‘infected’ start displaying even more bizarre behavior. A father tries desperately to save his son, against all odds. I actually wasn’t expecting to like this novel as much as I did–and I wholeheartedly recommend it to any King fans, or any zombie fans (A while back I read Brian Keene’s The Rising which is a pale, pale version of this novel–so any disappointed zombie fans can take solace in Cell)

The Walking by Bentley Little

Bentley Little is one hell of an author. His brand of horror ranges from the slyly humorous to genuinely haunting–The Walking is one of the latter. The story follows Miles, a private detective who gets a new case–and he discovers that the dead have reanimated and begun walking (even when restrained, they continue to walk) westward, to the Arizona desert. This is a very smart zombie novel, and definitely recommended for fans of Stephen King, and of a well-written horror novel in general.

MOVIES:

Night of the Living Dead/Dawn of the Dead/Day of the Dead/Land of the Dead (Diary of the Dead…even if it is sucky)

No zombie–or horror, or even influential films–list would be complete without George Romero and his legacy. Beginning with Night of the Living Dead, when a Venus space probe explodes in the Earth’s atmosphere, the dead re-animate and take to feasting on human flesh, attacking a group isolated in a Pennsylvania farmhouse. Dawn of the Dead revisits the zombie apocalypse, with completely new characters isolated in a shopping mall, while legions of the undead attack. Day of the Dead shifts the location to a subterranean military bunker, whose inhabitants research the zombie physiology, fear they are the only remaining survivors on Earth, and focuses on the human threats in the group over the external zombie threats. Land of the Dead, Romero’s 2005 release, focuses on a fortressed city, ruled by an oh so appropriate devil-in-a-blue-suit Dennis Hopper. Part a critique on socio-economic divides, part a possible criticism of the Iraq War, it’s also just cool to see Romero with high budget, hi-tech zombies at his disposal.

All of Romero’s work uses zombies as a means to examine, satirize and critique humanity–and no one does it better.

**Note–There was also the release of Diary of the Dead this past year–mostly unnoticed, hitting few theaters nationwide. Diary follows a group of film students, and is told through their footage (as seems to be the rage what with Cloverfield and Quarantine, etc). The film’s dialogue is kitschy, the students are narcissistic idiots, blithely refusing to accept the ‘official story’–and accepting this film at face value, it is a huge disappointment. I’ll admit it. BUT, since it is Romero, I don’t know if this all wasn’t completely intentional as a critique of our sort of You-Tube, look-at-me generation. Anyone else seen the film and care to comment? Huge disappointment? Or is Romero once again biting his thumb at us?**

Zombi (aka Zombi2)

Lucio Fulci’s definitive zombie film. Zombie apocalypse strikes New York by means of a seemingly abandoned boat–some crazy research has been happening on an isolated tropical island, and the zombies have escaped to quench their unquenchable hunger. This is an incredibly gory movie, in all the best ways. Plus…three words: Zombie Shark Battle. That’s right.

*Note–if you’re wondering about the title, Zombi and Zombi2 are the same movie. Fulci changed the name to Zombi2 since the film was released in the same year as Romero’s Dawn of the Dead–whose title translated internationally as Zombi.

The Serpent and the Rainbow

Based on ethnobotanist & anthropologist Wade Davis’ doctoral dissertation (yes, his REAL dissertation), The Serpent and the Rainbow takes zombies back to their roots in Haitian voodoo. A Harvard researcher travels to Haiti at the behest of a pharmaceutical company that wants him to investigate the properties of a local drug used in voodoo practices, as it is hoped to be an alternative to anesthesia. Although this film doesn’t get much love from horror fans or critics, it’s one of my favorite Wes Craven titles. The acting is superb (Bill Pullman stars), the tone is serious and dramatic, and the cinematography is pretty cool. There’s a lot of time spent on Haitian and voodoo rituals, which is very interesting. Plus, it’s just so different from most other zombie films, especially for a director like Craven (A Nightmare on Elm Street, The Hills Have Eyes, Scream). Highly recommended.

Night of the Comet

Campy, campy, campy! Deliciously so. A comet passes over earth, and anyone not in a steel encased structure at the time of the comet’s passing turns into red dust. Anyone that was only partially shielded (inside a concrete house, for example) well, they turn into zombies (though these zombies transform gradually, and are still capable of speech and normal thought functions). Two valley gal sisters find themselves seemingly the only survivors in Los Angeles, but they aren’t defenseless, thanks to their military dad’s training them how to shoot with uzis and the like. The girls hook up with Hector Gomez, and then discover the nefarious deeds of a US government agency. YES this movie is ridiculous–but it’s wonderful in its admitted camp fun. I actually saw this rerun on sci fi a few months back–though it’s available on DVD now, so totally worth the netflix rental.

Virus (aka Night of the Zombies, aka Hell of the Living Dead, aka Zombie Creeping Flesh, etc)

A group of commandos go into Papua New Guinea to investigate a radioactive chemical leak. What they discover is a population of zombies. This is by all accounts a terrible movie. The camera is awful, the script is awful, the soundtrack is really cool but totally ripped off. There is a lot of stock footage in here–random shots of animals running around, WTF?!–but…for all that, it’s so much fun. You know, in a sort of Plan 9 or Manos: The Hands of Fate, MST3K kind of way. It’s the kind of movie you watch to get in a few laughs as well as some decent zombie attacks, or have it projecting on the wall at a party or something. Personally, I likey.

*Note: apparently this is one of the most “alternatively titled” films of all time, according to wikipedia. Now that’s an honor! Heh.*

28 Days Later/28 Weeks Later (I think DAYS sucks though)

All cards on the table–I didn’t really like 28 Days Later. I felt it was a ripoff of Day of the Dead, and besides boasting a cool soundtrack and some interesting grainy cinematography, there really wasn’t much to this film (and it irks me to no end that it is constantly heralded as something OMG GREAT AND ORIGINAL. Because really…it’s not). For a “zombie” (I use quotations as they aren’t really zombies) movie that takes itself seriously as a horror film, the premise is pretty lame–monkeys, infected with RAGE (not a drug, but actual rage, having to sit and watch footage of human bruatlity in a lab) are responsible for the outbreak. Blah blah blah, the military is bad and intent on raping girls for fun, yadda yadda yadda.

Still, 28 Days brought us the oxymoronic ‘fast zombie’, and is an important film in the zombie cannon. Any fan worth their salt has to at least watch this film.

Surprisingly…I love 28 Weeks Later! All of the pretentiousness of the first film is done away with in this sequel, and the change in director brings a brutal hopelessness to the film (while still keeping the same cinematography and cool score). Yes, there are a ton of plotholes with this film, but those aren’t as important–this is a more visceral, emotional film, and really worth not just watching, but owning. You don’t need to watch the first film to see this one–I’d definitely recommend Weeks over Days.

Resident Evil/Resident Evil 3 (RE2 never happened)

Based on the video games, the Resident Evil films are blood-splatteringly good fun. Don’t look for any deep meanings or metaphor here–but if you’re in the mood for a kick-ass, highly stylized zombie flick, these are for you. Plus, Mila is made of awesome. (I didn’t include RE2 because…well, frankly it’s BORING! And just…terrible. Just, no. NO.)

Horror Classics Vol. 1: White Zombie

Commonly cited as the first zombie movie ever made, White Zombie stars the legendary Bela Lugosi as a voodoo master who controls his mindless zombies with his evil magic. A jealous man, refused by the object of his affection, turns to Bela Lugosi to turn his would be lover into a zombie to trick her fiance into thinking she’s dead, and then too win her love. This film is very…strange. Not really as ‘classic’ as Lugosi’s other films, but still a wonderful surreal movie, and a must for the mere fact that it is the first zombie film.

Fido

This little gem is hilarious. In an alternate world, the zombie apocalypse has occured and been beaten down, though the world has resultingly resorted to a 1950s Leave it to Beaver type of society. The cause of zombies here is radiation, that causes any deceased (as soon as they die) to reanimate as zombies–so every citizen must be closely monitored. What’s even better is that well-to-do families can afford to hve zombies as pets (domesticated by way of their brain controlling collars). This is really a story of a boy and his “dog”, except his dog Fido is really a zombie. I love this movie–it’s hilarious and completely fresh. It also stars Carrie Ann Moss (aka Trinity) in the lead role, which is always a plus.

Grindhouse Presents: Planet Terror

Oh, The Grindhouse! This film, along with Tarantino’s Death Proof, is so much fun–and it was a steal in the theater with the two films for the price of one. A deadly government gas leaks, turning people into bloodthirsty zombie-like creatures (although some folks are immune to the effects of the gas). Cherry Darling, aspiring stand up comedian who go-go dances by day, is played by the gorgeous Rose McGowan. This movie is a treat–hilarious, disgusting, thrilling, and sexy. A throwback, it’s exploitational and only in the best ways. Love it. If you haven’t seen it yet, you really need to get on board (and get Death Proof while your at it!)

Shaun of the Dead, Return of the Living Dead, Dead Alive, Re-Animator

Since I’ve already written about these films, I’ll just give them another quick mention here. Essential.

The Remakes: Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead

These are both solid remakes–but only to watch after you’ve seen the originals. I’m a stickler about these things. The Night of the Living Dead remake has one huge script change that is all fine and good, but only if you’ve seen the original ending. Dawn of the Dead is loyal in themes and spirit, but introduces fast zombies. Still, I own both remakes, and they are great fun updates.

PHEW!!!! SO there you have it. Thea’s list of essentials. Later on, for zombie appreciation week, we’ll go more in depth with lesser known films, books, video games, etc–but for now, this will have to do.

Any other zombie favorites? Want to make a case for or against any of the works on the list? Let us know!

Title: The Beast Within

Author: Anthology, edited by Matt Hults

Genre: Horror, Short Fiction

Stand Alone or Series: Stand alone anthology, a collection of stories dealing with shapeshifters of all kinds

Why did we read this book: One of the first books we reviewed on The Book Smugglers was the Graveside Tales horror anthology Fried! Fast Food, Slow Deaths. We were contacted by Matt Hults (who had a story in Fried! that we quite enjoyed) who asked if we would be interested in reading another GST antho he had edited with The Beast Within. Having enjoyed Fried! and seeing how well this fit in with our Halloween Week plans, we took this as a sign and eagerly accepted the offer!

Summary: (from GravesideTales.com)
Throughout history they have existed in folklore and nightmares…

From ancient cultures to the high-tech future, nowhere is safe from the shape-shifting bloodlust of The Beast Within.

Review:

Given that this is an anthology of 20 short stories, we decided to approach our review a little differently, offering mini-reviews for each entry.

Ana: I got the first 10 stories.

“Claws of Native Ghosts” by Lee Battersby

We go back in time with the first story in the anthology. Narrated in first person by one George Dawson, a soldier in the 21st Regiment of the Royal North British Fusiliers, stationed in Mandurah, in the colony of Australia. It follows the regiment’s problems with the local natives via George’s warped point of view. Little by little, it becomes clear that George is mentally disturbed and has created an alternate reality for himself in which he is more important than he really is. When a native spirit of a cat-like creature chooses to inhabit George’s body, things come to a horrific showdown. As an opening story in a horror anthology this story is very effective with the added bonus of mixing an aboriginal tale to a historical setting.

“Like Cat and Dog” by Michael Stone

This story is set in a world where were-cats and were-dogs co-habit with the mundanes without problems as long as they keep to themselves and don’t give in to their animalistic habit of feeding from humans. Sophie is a bartender at the local bar that caters for both cats and humans and she observes as the thrill seeker Jade comes on to a cat and tries to seduce him with the prospect of her own blood. When Owen, a local dog, walks in and ends up tasting Jade’s blood, she knows there will be trouble. She takes Jade and flee – but is followed by Owen and some of his wolf-friends. There is a cool showdown but I wonder if a cat would be able to take down so many wolves but I guess it all comes down to her real motivations – which we learn in the surprising twist at the end.

“Gift of the Bouda” by Richard Farnsworth

Captain John Rogers is a veteran of the army trying to cope with post traumatic stress disorder and OCD after a failed Somalian operation. AS the story opens he is meeting with his new psychiatrist who has decided that the course of treatment of simply giving out meds is not effective. The patient who is desperate fort he med that keep him compulsion (as he calls it) then starts to tell what happened on that fateful day seven years and how his team had a face-off with a were- creature and what exactly happened to him. Now, the psychiatrist really wishes he had given him his meds, doesn’t he? I really liked this story and how the author gives little snippets of John’s improved sense of smell and hearing as clues to what he really is.

“Hatchet Job” by John C. Caruso

A story that features a …… were-slug! Wow, that’s new. And very unexpected. It opens with an after-the-fact recount at the police station by David who is an office bully and hates his co-worker Carl, whom he finds stupid and slow. Turns out there is an explanation for that (points to the first line) . But as we hear more of David’s reasoning the more it becomes clear that he is consumed with his own fear of the different and his own prejudices. Who is the Beast Within here, really? The last sentence is very powerful in conveying just that thought.

“Yard Sale” by Norma Lehr

Fred Griswold and his wife Kate are having a garage sale. They plan to move to Arizona where their needs will be different and because of that the sale include Kate’s favourite pot where she has cooked their family meals and Fred’s favourite knifes and coat….a very special coat. The emotional connection that Fred has with his knifes and the coat presented by his grandfather becomes clear as the story unfolds and he hopes someone special will buy them.
But when Fred’s own granddaughter shows up and is attracted to the goods he is more than happy that the family inheritance with be kept in the family. The story had potential but left me wanting to learn …and understand more of Fred’s family special powers.

“Desert Heart” by William D. Carl

A western! Great!

The Sheriff of Small town Cactus Torch is a werewolf. Transformed a few years ago after an attack, he left wife and kid behind for their protection. Aware of the danger he represents he has confided his secret to his deputy, a young boy named Mike who stands guard when the moon is full and the sheriff barricades himself behind silver bars. When a series of attacks happen and the sheriff suspects that they are the work of a were-creature, he decides to go hunting – it is his town and he will protect it even it means to let his wolf lose. This was my least favorite of the stories I read – I thought the Western setting was underused (the story could have happened anywhere at any time) but also the reasoning behind the sheriff’s distance from his family felt contrived – if he felt self enough around Mile barricaded behind bars, couldn’t he have done the same back home?

“Let’s Welcome the New Guy” by Raoul Wainscoting

This is the shortest of the stories I read and one of my favourites with its cynical humour and laugh out loud quirky moments. The story plays with the craziness that Politically Correctness can bring as Employees at Waxman-Wayne are summoned by HR guy to explain the rules of behaviour around the new accountant guy who is a were-wolf , oops, sorry excuse me, a “Transformative American” according to the LAPA, The Lycanthropic American Protection Act. Seriously, the whole meeting is hilarious!

“Beached” By Joel A. Sutherland

The tale is narrated by Sheila, a fisherman’s wife whose husband Eddie, disappeared one day at sea along with his crew mates Jack, Charlie, and Robert. Sheila believes her husband is not dead and as the days go by and other people become certain that they are dead, Sheila becomes more and more certain of the opposite – she camps at the beach day and night staring at the sea waiting for Eddie’s return.

The were-creatures here are strange ones but to say more is to spoil the twist. I thought this tale to be the most emotional of the stories with a realistic portrayal of a woman consumed with grief but also with hope which is rewarded when Eddie comes back 29 days later (and this number is significant), a changed man.

“Needs to be Met” By Mark W. Coulter

Stephen, who works in advertising, takes a night off to pick up a woman, any woman at a bar. In walks this woman , Charlene who is also looking for something out of her night out and is more than agreeable to Stephen’s approach and invites him home. The moment she tells him she is a widow with children to feed, I knew just what sort of the were-creature she was and it was creepy when she revealed herself to Stephen. Hands down, the scariest of the stories I read, even if a bit predictable.

“Some Touch of Pity” By Gary A. Braunbeck

Some Touch of Pity is a complex story of a man who feels he has become a monster and has been living with this self-hatred for years, believing that the actions and emotions of his young self – who appears to him quite often – were to blame for his change into a werewolf. The story interpolates between past and present and with the rich background of a Native American tribe to boot.

I appreciated the layers in the storytelling although at points it was bit confusing and the powerful emotions (the tale of his young self and what he suffered was a punch to the gut, and highly disturbing) but in the end, I was frustrated as it felt like he was rewarded for the darkness of his soul and the bad things he has done.

Thea: I’ll kick off the back 10 stories.

“The Night John Fell” by Rick Moore

This is easily one of my favorite stories in the anthology. Following a fifty-some year old recovered alcoholic named John who works at the local gas station, we see a strange sort of shapeshifter apocalypse take place. Beginning with a regular named Greg, John watches in horror as his erratic behavior actually starts manifesting in a physical transformation. I loved the grotesque imagery of this story, from Greg snorting sunflower seeds and sprouting a beak, to the wolf creatures outside by the gas pumps. The writing style is well paced, engaging and very effective. Plus, it’s just a cool idea, and a different spin on the zombie apocalypse take. Loved it.

“Okie Werewolf Looking for Love” by Steven E. Wedel

“Okie Werewolf” has an intriguing concept and format for a story, taking the form of a “Dear Abby” type of letter…except that Randy, our narrator, is writing in to a mag called “Beasts and Babes”. The voice for Randy is pretty funny–he has recently become a werewolf, and I loved his admission that now that he can lick his own balls (and gets off on it), there’s no way in hell he’d stop even though his ex-girlfriend was tripping out about it. This is a fun, very short story, drawing more on laughs and a damn good mocking characterization of the main character.

“The Marine” by John Palisano

I’m torn with this story. On the one hand, it has great descriptions and an epic battle between a were-shark and were-squid. On the other hand, it felt almost too ambitious for that space allotted. How exactly did Dylan become a shape-shifting marine animal as well? What war were they involved in? I liked the concept of this story and certain elements (such as the action scenes) were nicely handled. But, I can’t help feeling that this would have made a better novella, allowing more time to get to know these characters. Still, a nicely done piece, even if it did bite off more than it could chew.

“Lure of the Wolf” by Belea T. Keeney

This is another story I really liked–in a sort of futuristic urban fantasy setting, “Lure of the Wolf” follows a quiet older woman as its protagonist, a librarian named Vivian. In the year 2045, lycanthropes (and vampires) have been officially recognized and monitored by the government. Vivian suspects that a werewolf has been in her azaleas, but for some reason does not call the authorities on the rogue wolf (as all the wolves stick in packs and are supposed to have migrated north to the mountains by this time of year). Through Vivian’s experiences, we see the reluctant beginnings of a friendship between the older woman and the outcast wolf. As with the previous story, I think this could have been the beginning of an excellent novella–heck, even a full-length novel. I found myself wondering what happened to Vivian and the golden-pelted wolf? The story ends very abruptly, and I yearned for more. Also, there’s a lot of history crammed into the span of two conversations in this short space, and had this been a full-fledged novel, the writing probably would seem to flow more smoothly. Despite these misgivings, I was pulled into this story completely and I highly enjoyed it–it stands apart from other pieces in this anthology as a more emotional, human tale with a very different main character. One of my favorites of the book.

“SQ 389″ by David W. Hill

“SQ 389″ is a trip. Literally. In a futuristic setting, where humans ‘plug in’ to the net (and in essence recreate themselves in their own image), Lieutenant Perusquia of the investigates a man’s murder, by a lobo–a wolf, with a very high Stealth Quotient. Part cyberpunk, part mystery thriller, this is probably the most complex story in the book–which is both a good and bad thing. Reading Mr. Hill’s bio, I see he’s web designer and programmer, and this expertise definitely comes across in “SQ 389″. While it’s a wonderful idea, I couldn’t help but feel lost with some of the concepts–how can people manifesting in the virtual space give things (like meds) to people in the ‘real’ space? Still, I found the concept of the virtual hacker-type ‘wolves’ and the actual existence of a real wolfman very clever, embodying the whole dichotomy of reality versus the simulated reality brilliantly. Even if I’m not quite smart enough to grasp the finer concepts! Very, very clever story.

“Crop Frogs” by Gina Ranalli

“Kermit’s gonna git ya!” Hah! My single favorite line of the entire book. An enterprising couple takes to sneaking around swamps to scrape green slime off rocks to sell to pharmaceutical companies–as it is the newest miracle ingredient in sexual enhancement/erectile dysfunction medicine. But, unfortunately Joe (the husband) gets bitten on the arm by a giant frog. Named Kermit. Soon after, Joe starts changing–he doesn’t want to leave the shower. His skin starts taking on a greenish, amphibious tint and texture…

“Crop Frogs” does everything a short story should do–it hooks the reader in quickly, it doesn’t give extraneous information, the characters are well-developed…and it blends horror and dark humor effortlessly without taking itself too seriously. Definitely one of my favorites of the book.

“Of Silver Bullets and Golden Teeth” by Trent Hergenader

I was hoping to get a western in the book, and “Of Silver Bullets and Golden Teeth” is it (love the title, by the way). Drawing on the skin-walker Native American lore, this story introduces us to Jim Brick, the second-best gunslinger in the West. Richard Craft, a Yalie, propositions Jim for his hired skills, asking for his help in finding–and possibly shooting–his brother Frederick “Goldie” Craft, named Goldie for his golden tooth. Jim Brick’s services are needed because Richard has only one silver bullet, and he needs a man that can aim true and kill with a single shot, should the need arise-turns out Goldie has been possessed by a spirit, and has taken the form of a great golden-jawed bear.

“Of Silver Bullets and Golden Teeth” is a highly entertaining story–the characters are believable, and the plot well paced. The ending especially is a nice touch. Another solid entry–probably one of the best written of the bunch. Mr. Hergenader definitely knows how to tell a story.

“By the Light of the Silvery Moon” by Vince Churchill

This entry is just…cool. Treece Van Dyke is the Lunar, the latest a torch-bearer in a long family line that bears the lycanthropic curse–but the Van Dykes have turned their curse to good, with each member becoming a costumed vigilante. The catch is that each member that dons the cape can only transform to wolf form 100 times, and then, sworn to the Van Dyke family code, they must injest a serum that will restore them to fully human. If the code is not upheld, the beast’s bloodlust can take over–as is the case with Treece’s arch nemesis, Dreissen (aka the Manimal). The story opens with Treece reluctantly giving up his suit having reached the transformation limit, resigned to drink the serum and pass the torch on to his son. Until, however, he receives a call from the A.I.–named Alfred (the last Van Dyke was a big Batman fan)–that Driessen’s den had been discovered by the police, and Treece goes on one last run as the Lunar. As a fan of Batman and other comic book characters of the vigilante persuasion, I was immediately drawn to this story. I love the idea that there’s a quota on the number of times a man can shift from human to wolf, without losing himself forever to the beast. Most of all, I loved the extension of the masked hero/villain theme to werewolves here–Batman and Joker are nemises but separated only by a very fine line, hence why time after time Batman captures Joker and throws him back in Arkham instead of killing him, despite everything he has done (killing Jason, paralyzing Barbara, etc). In this sense, the line separating Lunar from Driessen is even more tenuous, as they are both werewolves, and Treese is at his limit before losing himself completely to his wolf. Very cleverly done, and a definitely in the running for my favorite story of the book.

“Colugo Men” by Michael J. Hultquist

Narrated in the first person, “Colugo Men” begins with Earnest Price, an 86 year old man, telling us his story. A former soldier and former doctor, Earnest rediscovers new meaning in his life with his grandson David. The two are very close, and Earnest would do anything for him. One Halloween evening, however, Earnest walks into David’s room and finds the boy dead, his body mutilated by a Colugo Man (a were-dog), who is still perched on David’s bed, eating. Earnest vows to avenge David, and avenge him he does–in a slow, torturous methodical manner. “Coluga Men” certainly delivers with the revenge storyline, scoring high points on the torture scale. My only complaint would be the bare writing style–Earnest’s voice doesn’t much sound like an 80-some year old man, and the story is very cut-and-dry. It’s still an engaging tale, though, and I enjoyed it.

“The Immaculate Conception” by Matt Hults

The anthology ends with editor Matt Hults’ own story, “The Immaculate Conception”, which transports us back to 1673 aboard the English merchant ship the Immaculate, as it sails for the colonies with a ship full of slaves. On deck, a slave girl has just died giving birth, though the Captain was able to save her child by way of a last-ditch, desperate Cesarian Section. The Captain of the Immaculate as it turns out is an idealist, as is our protagonist, the first mate Eric. Captain Forester tells Eric, in the privacy of his cabin, that he will turn the ship around, back to Africa because of his moral conflict with treating other humans as slaves. Eric agrees–but they are stopped by Rupert Hollis, who owns the ‘cargo’. As the Captain and Eric’s plan is treason, the ship hands do nothing to stop Hollis from taking control of the ship, and killing the newborn infant. And that is when things get out of hand–by means of old magic, the slaves, the dead, even the ship itself undergo a nightmarish, almost Lovecraftian-like metamorphosis, killing the ship’s crew mercilessly.

This is the most cinematic of all the stories–I couldn’t help but compare this story to a sort of Pirates of the Carribean meets Dead Alive sort of sentiment. This was a very cool way to end the anthology–I’m impressed yet again with Matt Hults’ ability to write action sequences in a wholly entertaining story. I had a hard time swallowing the initial premise, with the Captain and Eric being so progressive and equality minded (wavering on preachy) early in the story considering the time period, but barring this characterization, the tale is, for lack of a better word, awesome. What’s more is, I loved this less literal interpretation of the “beast within”, embracing a more metaphorical sense of our inner demons (though, yes, there is that literal metamorphosis with the rat-people as well). Probably my favorite story of the bunch, though it’s a tough call!

Additional Thoughts:

Thea: This is going to sound completely random, but I like the little Hulk-looking guy used as a break design in each story.

Also, as with Fried! the art in this book is good fun. My favorite would have to be Stephen Blundell’s almost Jae Lee style art, especially for “The Immaculate Conception” and “The Claws of Native Ghosts”.

Also, I heard an interesting story about the cover art–apparently the artist (the talented Matt Hults again) took a virtual photo sample of author Mike Stone’s hair, and used that as a brush for the werewolf on the cover! Pretty sweet claim to fame.

Rating:

Ana: 6, good. Some stories are better than others but overall, a good experience for this non-horror reader.

Thea: 7 Very Good – There was a lot of wonderful variety in this anthology, from slave trading ships, to the untamed West, to even a futuristic cyberpunk simulated reality setting. I’ll certainly be on the lookout for some of these authors in future publications. Graveside Tales delivers once again with The Beast Within; it is a true treat for the shapeshifting enthusiast, and I definitely recommend it.

Reading Next: It by Stephen King

We proudly present you with the other popular screen icon monster, with Werewolves, Lycanthropes, and other assorted Shifters Day!

Lycanthropy (or the supernatural ability to transform from human to wolf) and Therianthropy (human shapeshifting to other animal creatures) have been popular themes in folklore around the globe–from the werewolves of Europe, to the kitsune of Japan, to Native American skin-walkers. Prevalent in myth and literature, the shape-shifter has also enthralled audiences with appearances on screen. And, thus, we are proud to give the shape-shifter its Hollywood close-up, and present our list of essential Werewolf/Shifter films!

The Wolf Man

Even a man who is pure in heart
and says his prayers by night
may become a wolf when the wolfbane blooms
and the autumn moon is bright.

The classic Universal Horror take on the werewolf is less horrific than it is an exploration of the human, tortured side of the ‘monster’. Larry Talbot returns to his home in Wales to bury the hatchet with his estranged father, only to be bitten by a wolf one evening, and becomes infected with the curse of lycanthropy. Doomed to transform into a wolf man, Larry struggles with his curse–only to meet a sad, tragic fate.

Silver Bullet

Based on the Stephen King novella Cycle of the Werewolf(do you detect a theme with many of my movie and book favorites?), Silver Bullet doesn’t usually make top 10 lists for werewolf films, or horror films for that matter. Personally, I really like this movie, dealing with a small town being terrorized by a werewolf. A paraplegic boy(played by Corey Haim of all people! Hell yes!) and his burdened older sister investigate as the killings in the town grow worse, and aided by their drunk Uncle Red (appropriately, Gary Busey! Hell yes again!) they discover who the wolf is, and have a classic showdown. Definitely worth a rental at least if you’ve never seen it!

Wolfen

This is a true mystery/suspense film with a great cast–starring Albert Finney, Gregory Hines, and my favorite Adama, Edward James Olmos. A police detective investigates a string of murders with victims that look as though they have been mauled by animals…and the detective soon discovers that there is a supernatural force at play. Based on the book by the same title, this film does a damn good job with making the audience feel what it is like to be in the superwolf skin–with the cool Predator-like infrared/heat sensor sight, and strange distorted noises. Also, it draws on the myths of Native American tribes, which is a cool shift from the usual European lycanthropy backstory.

Teen Wolf

Ok so technically this probably should be considered a horror-comedy. But, I love Teen Wolf, so I had to include it on the list! Scott Howard (played by Michael J. Fox) seems like your average red-blooded, all-American teenager. He seems completely normal, right down to his participation on his average school basketball team. But after a game, he undergoes a dramatic change–finally discovering his family’s unique heritage as werewolves. Seeing how this could change everything, Scott decides to use the wolf to his advantage, coming out at his next school game as a basketball playing werewolf (and he singlehandedly whoops on the other team). Soon, Scott becomes the most popular kid in school with his Wolf persona winning basketball games, and finally getting the attention of his long time crush. Ultimately though, Scott gets tired of playing the cool werewolf and refuses to come to the final game of the season as a wolf, determined to win the game as himself. Which he does. I love the end scene where Scott finally wises up and kisses best friend, the adorable Boof, right in front of the popular chick (who only liked him once he became a superstar baller). Yeah it’s a cheesy ridiculous movie–but it’s so much fun.

Ginger Snaps

Speaking of the teen lycanthropy flick, I don’t think any film does it better than Ginger Snaps. Following two teenage sisters, this Canadian horror movie cleverly uses Ginger’s transformation into a werewolf as a metaphor for puberty, and highlights some of the strains especially placed on young girls going through puberty, becoming sexually active, etc. This was a film that definitely took me by surprise–I honestly thought it looked kind of stupid and probably never would have watched had it not been recommended by a trusted friend. Don’t go for the sequels, but give this gem a try. The acting, special effects, and the writing is all very nicely done. Plus, you gotta love that title.

Sleepwalkers

Stephen King’s first written-straight-for-tv movie, and one that is very, very dear to my heart. Sleepwalkers gets a bad rap, but I’m not sure why. It’s darkly humorous with a healthy dose of wonderful old-school special effects, gore, and a nice ick factor to boot. A mother and son are all they have in the world–they travel from town to town, feeding off the souls of young virgins to sustain themselves (the mother-son relationship is the ick-factor as previously stated). The pair are Sleepwalkers, or were-cats, who can transform shape and make themselves invisible, and are also extremely charming. The son, Charles Brady, has his sights set on the pretty, sweet girl from his classes, named Tanya.

Really, this is a great fun movie–plus, for any Dark Tower geeks, there are a few subtle tie-ins to the books.

Dog Soldiers

We’re getting down to the top 3 werewolf movies of all time (in my opinion, of course). First up, Dog Soldiers, Neil Marshall’s first film. Six British Army soldiers are on a training op in the Scottish Highlands when they run across another team on the exercise…only this team has been brutally ravaged, with only one incoherent survivor. The team and survivor hole up in a cabin with a zoologist, where they are soon under siege by werewolves. Dog Soldiers actually feels more like a zombie movie, or at least reminiscent of The Evil Dead with its cabin under siege in the woods storyline, and it is cult-classic goodness. Essential viewing for any horror fan (especially since Mr. Marshall’s films seem to be heading south with each new release–ugh, Doomsday, anyone?)

The Howling

This is probably my favorite werewolf movie, although objectively it falls second to the next film on the list. The Howling follows Karen White, a tv news anchor who is being stalked by a serial killer named Eddie Quist. The film opens with Karen working with the police to trap Eddie, agreeing to meet the murderer at a porn shop. She enters a small dark theater room where Eddie is waiting for her–he asks her to turn around and look at him. Karen screams, and the police charge in, shooting Eddie dead. Karen cannot remember what she saw in the room, and under the advice of her psychiatrist, takes a leave of absence to The Colony–the doctor’s retreat in the woods for other suffering patients. The Colony is not as picturesque as it seems, however, as Karen soon discovers. The Howling is, granted, a little cheesy. But it balances a witty, darkly and subtly humorous script with crazy cool (granted, dated but still cool) special effects, and a good dose of gore and sex. It’s on cable now, I believe, with a lot of the horror marathons showing (on AMC, Sci Fi, etc)–definitely worth catching if you haven’t yet seen it.

An American Werewolf in London

Which brings me to probably the best werewolf movie ever made (in my opinion), An American Werewolf In London–technically, another horror comedy (and I mean comedy in the morbid sense). David and Jack, two college kids, are backpacking in Europe when they are brutally attacked by an animal. Jack dies in the attack and David survives, transported to a hospital in London. When David awakens, he is greeted by Jack’s ghost (showing the physical wounds he died of) who tells an unbelieving David that they were attacked by a werewolf, and that David should kill himself before the next full moon. Discharged from the hospital soon after, David moves in with a pretty nurse named Alex–and when the full moon hits, David turns into a wolf and goes on a bloodthirsty killing spree. When he awakens in the morning, he’s revisited by Jack’s ghost (even more decayed) along with the ghosts of his victims the night before, who again implore him to kill himself. You see where this is going.

An American Werewolf in London has all you could ask for in a werewolf movie–humor, horror, and kick ass special effects. Two words: Transformation Scene.

Suck on that, CGI!

And, as always, we invite you to share any shapeshifter movies you love! Any we might have forgotten?

Title: Demon Night

Author: Meljean Brook

Genre: Paranormal Romance

Stand Alone or Series: Book 5 of the Guardians series, but the third full-length novel in the series. The books are written such that one could theoretically read them as stand alone novels, but I would highly recommend reading at least the full-length novels in succession to minimize confusion, and to get a better sense of the overall universe and continuity.

Why did I read this book: Leading up to Meljean’s release of Demon Bound on November 4, I vowed to catch up with all her novels–and I have! Next week stay tuned as Ana and I will bring you an early joint review of Demon Bound, with a certain author guest! Plus, as it is our day for Demons for Halloween Week, what better way to celebrate?

Summary: (from MeljeanBrook.com)
Charlie Newcomb worked hard to get her life back together. But all that is shaken when she’s set upon by three vampires desperate to transform her beauty into something evil. But to get to her, they must first get to Charlie, now under the intimate protection of Ethan McCabe. As her Guardian, Ethan is attracted to her vulnerabilities—as well as her strengths. The closer he gets, the more protecting her becomes not just his duty, but his desire. But will it be enough to save Charlie when the demon night falls?

Review:

Demon Night marks the fourth book/story I have read by Meljean Brook–I loved Demon Angel, enjoyed “Thicker than Blood”, but wasn’t crazy about Demon Moon. Following my mixed reading experience with the last novel, I was not sure what to expect with Demon Night, though I was eager to read it. I needn’t have worried. This third full-length novel marked a welcome return to the issues raised in Demon Angel, and nearly all the problems I had with its predecessor were absent here. I whole-heartedly enjoyed Demon Night (though I still think Demon Angel is my favorite novel of the bunch–thus far).

Charlie Newcomb is, in plain terms, a fuckup. She was born with a beautiful gift, a singing voice so pure that even a Guardian can barely discern a flaw. However, Charlie also has something of an addictive, self-destructive personality and a alcohol habit–eventually leading to a drunk driving accident that irreparably damages Charlie’s voice forever. As Charlie’s downhill slide continues, her sister, the strong and intelligent Jane, delivers her an ultimatum–and effectively saves Charlie’s life. She quits the bottle and straightens herself out, spending hours at the gym and choosing to work as a bartender in a cruel sort of self-torture-pennance. And thus is Charlie when we first meet her, rolling her eyes at the d-bags in the bar, waiting for her break to start. On that break, however, in the dark shadows of the alleyway Charlie is attacked by vampires, but saved at the last second by a winged man–who she thinks of as her guardian angel. She’s not far off–her rescuer is Ethan McCabe, aka “Drifter”, her next door neighbor who also happens to be a Guardian–a sort of angelic protector, dedicated to defending humanity. The relationship between Charlie and Ethan is, as per Meljean’s usual, extremely well done. Charlie–needy and yet so strongly opposed to dependency fights an inner battle as she finds herself falling in love (needing) Drifter. Ethan initially warns Charlie that he will be there to protect her but nothing more, as he knows she might take his protection for something more, coming to depend on him and need him in ways he cannot provide. Their relationship grows slowly from fear and a tension of mutual attraction to full blown angst. Watching both characters grow through their relationship is a wonderful thing, and Miss Meljean (Drifter has taken over my vocabulary) shows us again how she can craft a scintillating romance with incredibly deep, layered characters.

As the Demon Night unfolds, we discover that Charlie’s sister, the brilliant Jane, is conducting some important research concerning the properties of vampire blood for a private company (aptly named Legion). Ethan is assigned by the Guardians and the SI (Special Investigations unit, a secretive branch of the Department of Homeland Security) to watch over Charlie, as someone has been orchestrating attacks on the extended family members of those scientists involved in the research of vampire blood. Whoever is behind the attacks has been forcing these family members to transform into vampires, as leverage. And, a new, terrifying creature, neither demon nor vampire nor nosferatu, appears on Earth, causing the Guardians a whole new set of problems.

The one thing that I had the hardest time with in the previous book, Demon Moon, was the confusing plot and writing style. Thankfully, Demon Night managed to avoid this pitfall altogether! I did not find myself confused or needing to backtrack at all. Everything just seemed to flow better than in the previous book, perhaps even more so than Demon Angel.

Although this book had more of a straightforward plot and was much easier to read, I also believe it fits a lot better into the overall continuity of the Guardians universe–much moreso than Demon Moon. The romance angle is superbly developed in this novel, but not to the detriment of the plot–and we see a return to the themes of the first novel, the lasting effects of Lucifer closing the gates to Hell, and the introduction of a terrifying new creature to this universe. I loved seeing the Frozen Field (I had been intrigued with this since its mention in Demon Angel), and the menace of the released nephilim. Most of all, I loved the return to Demons and their bargains. I love how Meljean takes the abstract theme of “Free Will” and viciously tears into it–though demons technically cannot harm humans directly as they cannot restrict a human’s free will, this does not mean that humans will not make decisions based on lies, or bring harm to themselves or others around them. We see a full-fledged return to this concept in Demon Night with the demon Sammael, and the limitations on Guardians such as Drifter or Jake. (In particular, I felt as though Jake–rookie Guardian that he is–would screw up pretty badly and restrict someone’s free will, which would result in him falling back to human form or ascending to a higher plane)

So far as characters go, I have to admit of all those I have encountered in Meljean’s work, Drifter is by far my favorite hero. I’ve always had a soft spot for gunslingers, and Drifter’s softspoken nature and his acceptence of Charlie, scars and all, is touching. Bit by bit we learn about Drifter’s past, his lost brother, and how he became a Guardian. Although initially I thought his “gift” was kinda weak, it certainly makes sense with his character, and I appreciated the later application of his power when combined with Charlie. Cool stuff. Plus, I’m a sucker for the whole “Miss (name)” thing. Very gentlemanly.

And then, there is Charlie. I loved this character. She is so wonderful because of her deep flaws–she has no one to blame but herself for the loss of her voice, and she is certainly more raw than previous heroines in the series. Her nature, compulsively needing things and yet needing NOT to need things feels incredibly real. Instead of a super!genius! Savitri or Demoness Extraordinaire Lilith, Charlie is just Charlie. Maybe not the smartest or quickest gal on the block (as she constantly puts herself down, saying she isn’t very clever), but she has been at rock bottom and fights fiercely for everything she has earned back. If I could have faulted the characters in the universe prior to this book, it would have been because everyone is so very clever (Savi with her programming genius and philosophical questions, Hugh with his multiple languages and degrees)–but Demon Night gives us a look at different, damaged characters, and it is for the better. I also loved the little touches that make Charlie seem more tangible as a person–her phonetic memory, for instance.

The secondary characters in this book are similarly strong and multifaceted–I have to admit that the relationship between Sammael and Jane is wonderful, maybe even more compelling than that between Ethan and Charlie (for me, anyways)! I have seen some reviews or interpretations that remark that Jane is weak for her inability to leave Sammael–but I don’t necessarily think that’s true. I think the scene that best describes Jane is when she explains to Charlie that she does not give up on people, or demons for that matter. Just as with Charlie, Jane issues an ultimatum and for better or for worse she sticks by those she loves. While this can be interpretated as a weakness of sorts, it’s a trait that makes sense for the character–and I loved reading this strange devoted relationship between the two characters. Sammael’s actions, driven by his own twisted love for Jane, also make perfect sense for the character. It might not be a healthy relationship, but love is love–and I give major kudos to Meljean for writing this complicated love story in opposition to the romance between Charlie and Ethan.

While the pros far outweight the cons with Demon Night, there were a few things I wasn’t crazy about–in particular the conclusion of the book, for last fifty pages or so. The final obstacle to Charlie and Ethan’s relationship felt protracted unneccessarily, and a bit silly, all things they went through in the book considered. Also, I’m not crazy about the vampire transformation and storyling, period–though this has more to do with my personal tastes as everything is written very well. I do like the uncontrollable nature of bloodlust for vampires here, but in general I’m just not a vampire kind of gal (of course, this is hardly a fault with the book–it’s just my personal baggage! Vampire fans should be very pleased with this angle to the book). The only other thing that I didn’t like in this book–and to a certain extent, in other books in this series–is the lengthy Architect-type conversations. By Architect conversations, I mean as in The Matrix Reloaded–when Neo finally opens the door and meets the Architect, who proceeds to answer all of Neo’s questions point blank in a drawn-out dialogue. Now Demon Night isn’t in the same zipcode–heck, not even the same state–as The Matrix: Reloaded in terms of data dumping, but I do wish that some of the reveals (such as Ethan’s past, his brother, Sammael’s role in his story, Charlie’s issues) weren’t made in dragging conversations.

Overall, I really enjoyed Demon Night–the characters are beautifully drawn, the romance is well written, and the the book turns back to issues I had dearly missed in the previous novel. Definitely a keeper, and I can’t wait to get started on Demon Bound!

Notable Quotes/Parts: I love Lilith.

“Teleportation,” Lilith said, pursing her lips. “I was sure his Gift would be making rainbows or something equally useless.”

To Ethan, regarding Jake’s newfound gift.

Additional Thoughts: Meljean Brook injects a whole lotta pop culture into her books, which is good fun. Demon Night has my favorite all-time movie, Die Hard, references in abundance. And I love this last speech from Charlie (revealing a lot about her character):

“Jane was nine when she fell in love with…with…his name starts with a ‘B’ and he was in that movie where the terrorists take over the skyscraper and he was just a lone cop against all the bad guys…I didn’t like the same what’s his name actor, though…Bruce, yes–because I liked the bad guy better. Until about a year or so ago, I was alone at home watching movies, and I see Bruce in another film and he’s looking up at this gigantic blue alien, and she’s got this synthesized coloratura soprano, and he’s about to cry because it’s so beautiful. Then the singer gets killed–which isn’t a surprise, because singers always get killed–but then Bruce suddenly turns into this big damn hero and goes after all of the bad guys. And at one point, a bad guy is holding a gun to a good guy’s head. But Bruce just walks into the room, and before the bad guy can react there’s a bullet through his head.”

Die Hard and The Fifth Element–two classics. (Plus, this is just a damn cool speech, in the middle of a twoshooter hostage showdown)

Verdict: I really, really liked Demon Night. Any fears or quibbles I might have had with Demon Moon were assuaged here, and I really cannot wait to read Demon Bound! Definitely recommended reading for any fan of well-written, incredibly smart, romantic paranormal fiction.

Rating: 7 Very Good

Reading Next: The Beast Within horror anthology